Lots of nasty stuff has been said about the “holy” Koran, (and that’s just what’s in the book itself), but it’s not completely useless, as these fine gentlemen demonstrate:
Add a log or two, a skillet, a few strips of bacon and a couple of pork chops… Yummy!
Public Safety Notice: To avoid wildfires, it is vitally important that you make sure the fire is completely out before leaving. If you’ve been enjoying generous amounts of cold beer with your bacon and chops (Tuborg and Carlsberg are great suggestions for your imbibing pleasure), your bladder should be more than capable of soaking the simmering remains of the Koran adequately. Vomit works as well, but we wouldn’t advise you to drink that much.
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[…] The Koran can be used if you’re having trouble with your charcoal grill. Misha’s got a picture. Posted by Ian S. in […]
February 4th, 2006 at 1:47 pmPerhaps BC can offer some “Koran Kindling” fire safety tips! :calvin:
February 4th, 2006 at 1:50 pmThe hell? And flushing a Koran down a toilet was considered to be a grave offense? I guess that it is unless you are a Muslim yourself. I wonder why they do it, I guess to start a fire and keep the people warm.
February 4th, 2006 at 1:56 pmI see some coronarys comin’…love it, love it, love it!!!…. :calvin:
:koolaid:
February 4th, 2006 at 2:07 pmIt has also been rumoured that the green book ‘o-lies-n-murder, when mounted securely to a plaque on the wall, and having a spare m-5 bayonet (or any other type will do) driven through at the proper angle, make surprisingly good coathangers.
February 4th, 2006 at 2:09 pmActually, the guys in the pic are Hindus. Very fine and outstandingly nice Hindus. The kind of people who wouldn’t stab a movie director, blow up the London tube or burn an embassy.
In other words: They’re sane, as opposed to the hyperventilating morons of the Religion of Pus.
February 4th, 2006 at 2:09 pmSire, far be it from me to question yer Rottiness’ fire fighting qualifications or *ahem* equipment but perhaps the LC’s should be reminded that a firehose is usually rated at a minimum of 400 psi.
Paper will burn at 451 degress Fahrenheit, thus ensuring that a Koran-assisted/Koran fuel-based fire is more than adequate for broiling and roasting.
While extinguishing this type of blaze, please make sure that: a) a sufficient supply of pressured fluid is available, b) your hose (and nozzle) is rated to handle the pressure, and c) the person handling the equipment has extensive training with that specific item. Do not let an amateur handle issued equipment as this may result in damaged goods.
Once the Koran fuel-based fire has been extinguished, please dry the equipment and return it to storage.
Any “modifications” that alter the manufacturer’s specifications must be inspected closely and submitted for recertification. For large Koran fuel-based fires multiple hoses may be needed to apply sufficient water volume or, if available, a much bigger single hose may be substituted.
February 4th, 2006 at 2:59 pmS,mores anyone? I’ll bring the marshmallows. Yes, good Hindus, indeed.
February 4th, 2006 at 3:07 pmDid you notice? The guys burning the Koran aren’t hiding behind maskes and bandanas. Maybe because they are real men and not the ass backwards raghead retard cowards that have been throwing temper tantrums over the last 4 or so days?
February 4th, 2006 at 4:33 pmBacon an’ pork chops, Tuborg and Carlsberg…unh….. and me a vegetarian! I raise a glass to the Hindus!
February 4th, 2006 at 4:53 pmRadical Hinduism is just as bad as radical (er…I guess I mean “mainstream”) Islam, the difference being that one keeps their shit within the confines of their own border while the other is spread across every inch of the globe.
February 4th, 2006 at 5:27 pmIf the Radical Hindus preoccupy themselves with exterminating the Pedophile Prophet’s followers, then I have absolutely no problem with that.
None.
None whatsoever.
It saves me the ammo.
February 4th, 2006 at 5:45 pmI’d highly recommend NOT using the Pedophile Profit’s Happy Fun Book of Misogyny, Murder & Mayhem™ (Piss Be Upon Him) for cooking ANYTHING.
Think about it… That’d be like cooking an aged, 2-inch-thick Porterhouse over a camel dung & asphalt shingle-fueled fire.
:puke:
February 4th, 2006 at 6:25 pmOh God, BC, don’t do that. Such horrors only happen during nightmares. Now if you were talking say, hickory and no shit, we’d be on to something here… such delicacies are a rare treat.
February 4th, 2006 at 6:47 pmOnly one problem — Due to extremely dry conditions, my outdoor burn permit has been suspended. Therefore, I can’t burn anything until we get some rain here.
I’ll be waiting.
February 4th, 2006 at 7:34 pmMike, if you just make sure to water your lawn before lighting the fire, you should be alright.
Now, the REALLY fun thing to do is to burn a FREE Koran from CAIR.
February 4th, 2006 at 9:00 pmRegrettably Oklahoma’s under a burn ban, the whole place smells like smoke anyway. However, I have one of those stove pipe style briquette lighters designed to run on
February 4th, 2006 at 9:35 pmnewspapersKoran pages so I may just try that this spring. Might grill buffalo steaks over it, though pork tenderloin and teriyaki sauce sounds good now too.I am not, MAWHAHAHA… when the weather improves I am gonna have a Pisslam-b-que, with some Palswinian flags, some Korans, and one saudi flag… Lots of pork and fire.
February 5th, 2006 at 4:08 amFine beers to be sure, but for me, “Bitte, en Bitt’!” … especially now that Germany is showing signs of a return to sanity.
Unfortunately considering where I am it’ll be two or three months yet until my R&R leave rolls around, and I can actually enjoy a Bittburger or Spatenbrau again….
February 5th, 2006 at 6:17 amWe have a burn bad still in effect here in Texas, well, except for my fire pit….hehe. Nothing like a little Ranger TV .
Burn, baby, burn!!
February 5th, 2006 at 9:04 amNational Burn the Koran Day, July 4, 2006….
I really can’t tell you how sick I am of militant radical Islam. Of dhimmitude, and political correctness. Of blind allegiance to the concept of peace, though it not be at hand, is not near. Militant radical Islam is on the march….
February 25th, 2006 at 12:38 pm