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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Archive for FRED! in '08, Idiotarians, Politics, RINOs
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At least that’s what Rod Dreher seems to ineffectually argue in this cosmic crapheap of an opinion piece.

His Imperial Majesty can’t possibly do a better job of incinerating that nonsense than LC & IB Ace does, so go read that one if you don’t mind being left with the mental image of Rod Dreher dangling from a coat rack by the elastic of his Hanes, crying uncontrollably about his lost lunch money.

We know we don’t.

But we do want to add this: Take your “you don’t like Huckabee because he’s a Christian” and shove it, pal.

We’re a Christian, about as Christian as they come, and we bloody well hate his guts. It’s not because he’s a Christian, no matter how much blathering buttskates like Rod Dreher would like to avoid addressing the real issue by donning the thorned crown of martyrdom instead, it’s because he’s a flipping nanny-statist, liberal, illegal alien-loving, murderer/rapist-pardoning, “hasn’t heard about the Cuban crises” imbecilic heap of incoherent, inexperienced, corrupt, flip-flopping sack of particularly nauseating codswallop.

In fact, that he’s a Christian (if, indeed, he is by any reasonable definition of the word) is his only redeeming feature.

But note this, Rod Dreher and Dreher wannabes, and note it well: THIS Evangelical Christian does NOT believe that that, and that alone, makes him qualified to be President. It certainly doesn’t disqualify him, but if that’s the only thing on his resume that doesn’t make us want to pull the lever for the trapdoor and feed him to the hungry tiger, then he can go get bent as far as we’re concerned.

If that makes us a card-carrying member of an “anti-Christian” Right Wing Conspiracy dreamed up by clowns such as Dreher, then so be it. That would make a religious fanatic out of Dreher, then, a fanatic of the sort that would make any Haji feel like a sinner in dire need of repentance.

As to ourself, it’s still Fred and Fred all the way, seeing as how he’s the ONLY candidate with some actual specific policies in place, conservative policies mind you, which we always found somewhat appropriate for a candidate running for an allegedly conservative party.

Also, he’s the only one of the candidates, with the exception of Hunter, that doesn’t make us want to vomit.

UPDATE: And now, via Hot Air:

Comments 17 Comments »

Another Great Moment in Journaljizzm, as an inanimate object is given free will and the ability to fire itself while the ClueFucked Journalijizzmer sits around scratching his pointed noggin (via IB Classical Values):

Yesterday afternoon, Nahdirah Jaamar dropped by a rowhouse on Salford Street to pick up her younger brother and ran into her 4-year-old cousin, Dyshon Boyd, a boisterous toddler that family members called “Pooh Bear.”

Dyshon gave Jaamar, 15, a big hug and a kiss, and ran off.

Roughly a half-hour later, the 4-year-old lay dying from an apparently self-inflicted bullet wound, another young victim of Philadelphia’s gun epidemic.

“Gun Epidemic?”

Try “Parental Stupidity Epidemic”, and couple it with “Journalistic ClueTardedness Epidemic” while you’re at it.

“Oh NOES! We’ve become infected by feral guns roaming the street, committing random acts of mayhem!”

Give us more, O Emperor! »

Comments 69 Comments »

Just a quick update on the state of our dear Imperial Tech Wizard, Deej, since a lot of y’all have been concerned and asking about him.

I can’t offer much by way of detail (and wouldn’t if I could unless given permission), but I want you to know that he’s currently in the hospital and getting better. Not as quickly as we (and he, I’m sure) would like, that’s never the case when you’re recovering from anything, but recovering nonetheless, which is the main thing here.

I also want to thank you all for your concern. We all miss him, and if you have any prayers/good thoughts that you can spare, please don’t hesitate to send them to the Appropriate Authority™. They’re all appreciated and, as we know, they work rather well too.


Comments 34 Comments »

…although, so far, we’ve yet to actually spot a dark cloud anywhere near the Writers’ Guild strike, so we guess the saying isn’t all that appropriate. So sue us.

Protein Wisdom brings us these horrible, HORRIBLE news:

LOS ANGELES - Two of Hollywood’s most glamorous events are now caught up in the entertainment industry’s ugliest labor dispute in two decades. The Writers Guild of America, West, will not allow its members to write for the Golden Globes on Jan. 13 nor the Academy Awards on Feb. 24.

Whatever will we DO?

There. Now that His Rottieness has the snark out of his system, he feels all better. We can only say one thing to the Writers’ Guild: Stay strong! Don’t give in, don’t cave, don’t yield an INCH! We’re counting on you to stand up for what is right, and keeping the annual circle-jerk festival off the airwaves is so right that it just makes us tingle all over.

What? You really thought that anybody were going to give a damn about your temper tantrums?

Think again.

UPDATE: As we think about it, the strike may have yet another silver lining. We mean, if the writers won’t write for the Limousine Socialist Circle-Jerk Awards of ‘08 and Hollyweird insists on putting on a show anyway, that would mean that the (badly) trained monkey presenters would have to go on and deliver their own lines for once, wouldn’t it? Sorta like [Insert random name of music industry trained seal who couldn’t carry a note in a bucket nailed to his/her forehead and only sounds bearable because of the wonders of studio equipment] getting so carried away with his/her own hype that he/she decides to do a show without lip-synching.

Now THAT would be TRULY hilarious. Unintentionally so, yes, but hilarious nonetheless. Heck, we might even tune in to watch it.

Comments 52 Comments »

LC Darth Bacon sends:

A cancer patient yesterday condemned health chiefs as immoral for threatening to stop her free NHS care if she buys a drug to help her treatment.

Former nurse Colette Mills was told her health authority would not provide the “wonder drug” Avastin.

It also rejected her offer to pay the £4,000 a month bill for it herself.

Now, we know that you HillaryCare supporters will be screeching about how insurance companies over here won’t automatically pay any sort of medication/treatment that we can come up with either, but that’s not the point. Here’s the REAL kicker:

But the 58-year-old, who is having chemotherapy after breast cancer spread through her body, was shocked to discover if she bought the drug privately then she would be liable to pay the entire bill for all of her care - likely to reach £15,000 a month.

Mrs Mills and her husband Eric were forced to back down because they could not afford this.

Sweet, isn’t it? “Not only will we not pay for your treatment of choice because we, your socialist slavemasters, don’t consider it worthy of our support, we also won’t pay a penny of the REST of your treatment if you dare go out and buy it YOURSELF!”

Their “justification?”

Ministers justify the policy by arguing that a two-tier NHS would be created, with those who could afford additional treatment paying for it while others in equal need having to cope without.

“It’s not fair for you to be able to afford something that others cannot, so if you go ahead and buy it, we’ll just have you executed for anti-social behavior.”

Interesting for a country that takes great pride in abolishing the death penalty, isn’t it? “We won’t execute murderers, child molesters and the like, but we most certainly will issue a death sentence if “anti-social” behavior is the issue. In a heartbeat.”

Just remember that the next time some socialist fuckwit here at home starts growing all misty-eyed about “one payer systems” or whatever the fuck they’re going to come up with next to camouflage the fact that they want to control every little bit of your life, including your health.

Every. Little. Bit.

Comments 20 Comments »

We’re all about tradition here in the Empire, and one of our most cherished ones is sending a Christmas card (or several) to the commie, Christian-hating fuckwits at the ACLU. Sure, they’ll go directly into the shredder, but that’s not the point. How much fun can you have for a few cents nowadays?

And if making the bastards at the ACLU go “eeeewwwww” and fear getting the Christian Cooties for even touching a picture of a nativity scene isn’t fun, then we don’t know what is.

Comments 12 Comments »

Will somebody, for the Love of G-D outfit those moronic goons with a GPS or, failing that, perhaps sticking handles on their helmets might help? (Link via LC & IB Bill Quick):

A Minneapolis police SWAT team kicked in the wrong door yesterday during an early morning raid,

AGAIN? Will we ever see a week pass by without a bunch of cluelessly lost ninja-clad chimpanzees kicking in the wrong door? Is there something in their genetic makeup, perhaps one of their three Y chromosomes, that makes it impossible for those police state fuckups to accomplish a simple task that thousands of pizza delivery drivers carry out without a hitch day and night in all kinds of weather?

Really. I seriously want to know. What the fuck IS it with those dense knobs?

prompting the man of the house to grab his gun and open fire on the officers who entered the house.

Good for him. Or not, as the case might turn out to be:

Police haven’t decided whether they’ll try to charge Khang with a crime. KMSP-TV says the Khang family is consulting with a civil attorney.

Charge him with what, pray tell? Protecting his wife and six kids, none of whom were hurt, thank G-d, against unknown intruders kicking in his door in the middle of the fucking night? The only one with legitimate grounds for a lawsuit here is Mr. Khang, who ought to sue the fucking city until they have to declare bankruptcy and start peddling miniature screwdrivers on street corners for a living.

Of course that’s never going to happen. The gummint can do whatever the fuck they please to us peons and they will never, EVER have to face the music for it.

KARE-TV reports that Vang was detained at the scene and released a few hours later. Police say there may have been a “language barrier” between the residents and the officers.

Oh sure. Blame the fucking victim, why don’t you, you flatfooted gumshoe piece of pig shit? The only “barrier” here is the one stuck permanently between the sensory input apparatus of your fuckheaded stormtroopers and whatever it is that resides between their ears in lieu of an actual brain. If that barrier hadn’t been there, then perhaps they’d have been able to read a fucking map.

“It was some bad information that was received on the front end that kind-of trickled all the way through,” police Sgt. Jesse Garcia tells the station. “It’s unfortunate because we have officers that were hit by gunfire

Pardon me if I don’t rush out to get the Kleenexes just yet, officer cocknozzle. Kick in somebody’s door in the middle of the night and whatever the fuck happens to you is your own damn fault, says I.

and this truly, truly could have been a much worse situation.”

You’re damn straight it could have. Your SS goons could’ve managed to hurt Mr. Khang or his family in the shootout that ensued once your marmosets found themselves under fire.

Fortunately, their marksmanship is as deplorably fucking pathetic as their ability to perform simple tasks such as getting to the right address.


Comments 97 Comments »

Sorry about the light posting, but thankfully the Imperial Staff (hush, you perverts, that’s not what I meant!) has been busy putting up excellent stuff while I’ve been otherwise occupied.

Such as B.C.’s brilliant post about the Environmentalists Socialists, thanks to which I found something that really says all that needs to be said about the snake oil salesmen and the even BIGGER imbeciles who follow them. Thanks to LC Mrs M-ITT™ for her comment in which she points out a picture she saw of the Goreacle in Norway, surrounded by his adoring Gorebeciles (also sometimes referred to a “Gorecolytes”), right beneath a banner saying “STOP CLIMATE CHANGE!”

We’ll take that one once again in case some of you either missed it or just couldn’t get the logical disconnect past your mental barriers:


Good fucking luck with that, you slobbering, sub-retarded protoplasmatic walking landfills. We’re sure that if you could build a time machine as your next science project, the dinosaurs and woolly mammoths would be ever so grateful if you could go back and share your secrets with them. Yeah, let’s all make the climate stop changing. Would you mind terribly fixing it at a comfortable 78 degrees or so with just a sprinkle of rain in the afternoons right after tea and a slightly heavier downpour, yet not so heavy that it disturbs sleep, between 3:30 AM and 4:30 AM every night? Oh, and having the wind in your back when you’re bicycling would be ever so wonderful as well. Going both ways, if it’s not too much of an inconvenience.

What’s next? Do you realize how much CO2 is produced as a result of our need for electricity every damn night? Yeah, that’s right. If it wasn’t for that damnable, Gaia-unfriendly nightfall, we could cut back our CO2 “pollution” even further!

So what the fuck are you waiting for, you easily fooled nincompoops? Get the papier-mache dolls together, unfurl the childishly spelled banners and get ready to “STOP THE SUN FROM SETTING!” What? It’s no more mind-breakingly idiotic than your demand to stop the climate from changing. How about changing the directions of the currents, ending death, reversing gravity and making Rosie O’Donnell have a coherent thought? OK, so that last one probably IS a bit more ridiculous than the rest, but still.

And we’re supposed to take anything that a bunch of barely literate clowns thinking they can stop the climate from changing are saying seriously?

Pull the other one, McDuff.

I’m sorry, but once an individual has demonstrated a disconnect from reality that profound, I’m done taking anything they might have to say at face value, including the time of day.

Come to think of it, I’m not sorry about that at all. Not one little bit.

Life’s too short to waste it on imbeciles.

Addendum: As a fun little exercise in “No Shit, Sherlock?!?!”-ism, do a quick search (using your preferred search engine) of the term “biofuel dream over” and watch the fun as some of the Enviro-Fascists™ smack their foreheads and go “Oh SHIT!” when they start actually thinking about the ramifications of taking our food crops and turning them into fuel. Grab some adult beverages and your favorite snacks, folks. It’s gonna be a fun show to watch as the GreenPissers® start feeding on themselves.—B.

Comments 72 Comments »

Indeed I will.

But Carol Sue Shields won’t.

Thanks to Mike Huckabee, who pardoned the scumbag who then, fresh after being let out of jail at Huckaclown’s behest, murdered her less than a year later.

Give us more, O Emperor! »

Comments 20 Comments »

So three Evil Jooos™ dare wish people on a Noo Yawk subway a Happy Hanukkah and are rewarded with a bunch of insults and assorted other abuse from a gaggle of anti-Semitic fuckwits, and who steps in to defend them?

A righteous, upstanding Muslim student from Bangladesh, that’s who.

We tip our Imperial Crown to that fine young man. Once for doing the right thing in spite of being badly outnumbered, and once more for giving our faltering beliefs in the human race a much-needed boost.

Mazel tov!

Comments 42 Comments »