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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Archive for EUroweenies
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Archive for the “EUroweenies” Category

(Link thanks to Sir Christopher)

A BBC executive died in mysterious circumstances after stripping off her clothes and walking into the sea.

Kari Boto, 53, was plucked from the water by a helicopter crew and taken to the hospital where her husband works as a doctor.

Nothing mysterious about it. Just another self-righteous, socialist sow convinced that she could walk on water.

Until it turned out that she couldn’t.

Comments 59 Comments »

And, given how almost entirely fact-free the BBC is, we can certainly understand why they’d be mortified to discover that they’d actually reported something correctly for once (via Honest Reporting):

The BBC apologized this week for referring to Jerusalem as Israel’s capital, and promised not to repeat “the mistake,” following a complaint by four British organizations.

And what were those four British organizations whose nutsacks the emasculated neo-Nazis of the BBC are slurping on constantly?

Arab Media Watch, Muslim Public Affairs Committee, Friends of Al-Aksa and the Institute of Islamic Political Thought sent a joint complaint to the BBC after a presenter on its Football Focus program on March 24 mentioned that Jerusalem was Israel’s capital and “historic soul.”

Is there a single one of those that isn’t a terrorist front organization?


Didn’t think so either.

So when will the anti-Semites at the BBC finally give up the pretense and start publishing their screeds in the original German?

Comments 15 Comments »

Imperial Minister of Jackbooted Thuggery, Jackboot, pointed us towards some of the funniest shit we’ve ever had the pleasure of reading.

We’ve taken the liberty of doing in-depth follow-up reporting, including interviews with a couple of participants in this latest show of force by one of the braver & more competent members of the EUnuchistani military juggernaut. Click below to continue reading the hard-hitting reporting from The Imperial Dungeon Game Room™ staff.

Note: If you’re offended by words that rhyme with “clock” & “rum”, don’t click below.

Give us more, O Emperor! »

Comments 106 Comments »

True to form, fwench Socialist Sow Ségolène Royal threatened with violence if she’s not the winner of the election (link via Protein Wisdom):

PARIS — France risks violence and brutality if conservative candidate Nicolas Sarkozy wins tomorrow’s presidential election, his Socialist opponent, Ségolène Royal, said yesterday.

On the last day of official campaigning, opinion polls indicated that Sarkozy was enjoying a commanding lead over Royal, who accused the former interior minister of lying and polarizing France.

“Choosing Nicolas Sarkozy would be a dangerous choice,” Royal told RTL radio.

“It is my responsibility today to alert people to the risk of [his] candidature with regards to the violence and brutality that would be unleashed in the country,” she said.

The darling socialists haven’t changed one little bit since the Germany of the 1930s. “Vote for us or unpleasant things are bound to happen to you.”

Pressed on whether there would actually be violence, Royal said: “I think so. I think so.” She said Sarkozy’s social policies as interior minister had increased tensions in the country, referring specifically to France’s volatile suburbs hit by widespread rioting in 2005.

Of course, Sarkozy was pretty much the only soul in fwance who suggested that something actually needed to be done about the Car-BQs, while everybody else were busy trying to figure out ways of buying off the barbarians.

But now it has nothing to do with the savages that the fwench, stupid that they are, have let inside the portcullis, torching Paris because their primitive mindset can’t allow for the infidels to ever be right about anything, murdering innocents because a couple of their retarded own tried hiding from the law in a power station and got fried in the process.

Oh no, it all happened because the mooselimbs knew, in advance, that Sarkozy would suggest that maybe there’s something fundamentally wrong with dousing handicapped people with gasoline and setting them on fire because two criminals you never knew ended up killing themselves.

And, true to what Socialists are all about, the syphilitic sow are telling fwench voters that the best thing you can do, in fact the ONLY thing you can do in the face of aggression is to surrender immediately or you will deserve the outrages of the barbarian hordes. I’m so very sorry that she and her mindless followers weren’t raped to death by rampaging mooselimb hordes, because not only would it have cleansed the world of useless filth, it would also have made for great entertainment.

Allow us to quote Niccolo Machiavelli, thanks to a reminder from Hot Air:

If you yield to a threat, you do so in order to avoid war, and more often than not, you do not avoid war. For those before whom you have thus openly demeaned yourself by yielding, will not stop there, but will seek to extort further concessions, and the less they esteem you the more incensed will they become against you. On the other hand, you will find your supporters growing cooler towards you, since they will look upon you as weak or pusillanimous.

Or, as His Imperial Majesty likes to put it:

Oderint dum metuant.

“Let them hate you, as long as they fear you.”

Comments 25 Comments »

The Littlest Wanker of the Feckless Fifteen, 12-year-old Arthur Batchelor of the Royal Rubber Duckies, reveals new and hitherto unknown details about the levels of depravity that he was subjected to while in Iranian captivity, details so horrifying that we can scarcely bring ourself to posting them, but the truth must out!

Artsy holds hands with Mumsy and Auntsy after his return from the Tehran Hilton

[Batchelor] revealed that the hardest part of his nightmare in Tehran was when he was separated from mum-of-one Faye - who he said was like a big sister to him - and chucked into solitary confinement.

…speaking of the moment they were reunited, he told how he wept and begged the 26-year-old for a hug. Arthur said: “I missed Topsy most of all. I really love her, as amumand a big sister. Not seeing her and not knowing if she was safe was one of the hardest parts of the whole thing.

“Then on the sixth day, when I was just about giving up hope, I was pulled from my bed in the early hours of the morning.

“They led me down a corridor and into a room, where I saw Topsy in a corner.

“I can’t describe how that felt…just every emotion rolled into one. I ran up to her, threw my arms round her and cried like a baby.

“When I’d calmed down, she asked, ‘Do you need another hug, a mother hug?’ and I said, ‘damn right’.

For shame, what a potty mouth on you, Artsy! Saying ‘damn’ to Topsy-Mumsy! Did you kiss her with that mouth?

“We asked to be put together in a cell, but the guards wouldn’t have it.”

After that display, I can certainly see why. It’s a wonder the poor Iranian guards weren’t barfing up and down the walls.

Meanwhile, thanks to LC Mrs M-IT™, we learn of even more trials and tribulations!

Royal Navy able seaman Arthur Batchelor, 20, said the suits they were given were “tacky”, the CDs and DVDs do not work and there was no sign of his iPod portable media player, worth £160 (R2 229).

Oh no, they took little Artsy’s iPod, and he doesn’t like the goodies in his pink goody bag. Maybe Topsy-Mumsy will give him a hug while he cries like a baby?

The 11 books Batchelor was given were in English and mostly aimed at trying to convert the reader to Islam, with titles like Youth and Morals, The Divine Intervention and Knowing God. He also received some toffees and a bag of nuts.

“They’re a bit pathetic,” Batchelor told the Daily Mirror newspaper of the gifts.

And since he’s speaking as the ultimate authority on “pathetic”, we’ll take his word for it.

“I don’t know what they’re trying to prove by giving us books on morality and their religion. My morals are fine, thank you very much.

That, on the other hand, is very much up for debate, particularly if we’re talking about moral fibre, the which you wouldn’t recognize if it jumped up and stole your pacifier right out of your chubby little pink hands.

“And those suits were an insult.

Hard to tell from the pictures, particularly considering the beaming smiles and handshakes, jokes and laughter and adoring glances at your captors.

Not only did mine not fit,

It’s been next to impossible to find suits in your size since the mullahs outlawed Ken and Barbie.

but it was cheap and tacky and the Hugo Boss shirt was a fake. I could pick up a better outfit at a jumble sale.”

Did it at least button under your botty like the, er, “shirts” that you wear back home at Mumsy’s house?”

The iPod was really special to me as it was a gift,” said Batchelor, an operator maintainer.

“It was in a pocket in my overalls. The guards took everything off us - including cigarettes and watches.

“All we were left with was the clothes on our back. We were told we’d get them back - but I’m still waiting.”

And he shall not know a moment’s rest until his iPod with his Sesame Street Song Collection is returned to him, so you Iranians better beware!

Question: Does this wanker really, for a fleeting second, think that his opening his camel-jizz-filled gob makes him look any better?

He might want to shut up while he’s behind but, then again, think of the prime mockery material that we’d have to forgo.

***UPDATE***: B.C. the Imperial Torturer wins the Funniest Lil’ Arthur PhotoShop Sweepstakes™ hands down with this contribution:

Sir Wetsalot

Comments 124 Comments »

Thanks to LC Gunsniper, who was the first to alert us to this, the latest humiliation for what used to be a proud service:

The 15 British military captives who were released by the Iranians have been authorised by the Ministry of Defence (MoD) to sell their stories.

MoD officials claimed that the move to lift the ban on military personnel selling their stories while in service was justified because of the “exceptional circumstances” of the case. The hostages are expected to earn as much as £250,000 between them.

The story of Faye Turney, 26, the only female among them, is expected to be the most lucrative. She could profit by as much as £150,000 from a joint deal with a newspaper and ITV.

“Exceptional circumstances” indeed. At least they’d damn well better be “exceptional”, because if breaking and pissing all over your uniform and your country after less than two weeks of “mean language, rough handling and undefined ‘psychological pressure’”, followed by kissing a terrorist and pirate’s arse while thanking him most profusely for his act of war is the rule, then the Royal Navy would be better off scuttling itself before it can disgrace its once-proud name any further.

Lt Felix Carman, RN and Cpt Christopher Air, RM prepare to re-deploy in their new Royal Navy uniforms.

***UPDATE***: And while the “feckless fifteen” are haggling with the media over the price for their Tales of Horror and Aggressive Questioning, the BBC decides to yank a story about a Victoria Cross recipient. Because it might offend people who disagree with the war (thanks for the link, alert reader John_R!):

Amid the deaths and the grim daily struggle bravely borne by Britain’s forces in southern Iraq, one tale of heroism stands out.

Private Johnson Beharry’s courage in rescuing an ambushed foot patrol then, in a second act, saving his vehicle’s crew despite his own terrible injuries earned him a Victoria Cross.

For the BBC, however, his story is “too positive” about the conflict.

And to the Haji sympathizers at the most pro-bin Laden network outside of al-Jazeera, that is simply not done. Let not a single positive word be broadcast about the real British heroes of the war. Better to waste hours on hearing about how the “feckless fifteen” went hours, hours without a decent cup of tea.

The corporation has cancelled the commission for a 90-minute drama about Britain’s youngest surviving Victoria Cross hero because it feared it would alienate members of the audience opposed to the war in Iraq.

The Beeb might want to consider just what kind of people they risk alienating by pissing on the sacrifices of a Victoria Cross hero. You know, an actual hero as opposed to the effeminate wankers that just got home with their pink goody bags and cheap suits (and Mahmoud’s jizz dribbling down their chins). We may be going out on a limb here, but we know that there are still Brits over there who revere their heroes and pack a fair punch when somebody tries to take a dump on the flag, and we’re willing to bet that they’re one heck of a lot more scary than the metrosexual, socialist latte-quaffers that the Beeb so loves to pander to.

Comments 20 Comments »

Remember Stuart Lockwood? Stuart Lockwood who refused to participate in Saddam Hussein’s propaganda broadcasts during Gulf War I? Stuart Lockwood who, in spite of being a lone civilian caught in the middle of a war at the mercy of a brutal dictator, refused to budge one inch, crossing his arms and letting Saddam know that “he wasn’t all that” and that there was no way in Hell that he’d help the psychotic mass murderer score a propaganda victory, no matter how scary the situation must have surely seemed to Stuart himself?

Our friends at the Jawa Report remember, and so do we.

By the way, Stuart was, at the time, 5 years old and he didn’t even get a cheap suit and a pink goody bag.

How times have changed.

Comments 2 Comments »

LC Jaybear, that evil genius, once again manages to say everything that needs to be said and we, obviously, once again couldn’t resist stealing it:

We have to admit, though, that the cute little kid in uniform on the lower right would look positively adorable in one of those darling little sailor outfits, sitting on a pony. Don’t you just want to hug him and cuddle him and tussle his hair and give him a bag of Iranian candy?

Comments 45 Comments »

…or, if you’re a Royal Marine, in a cheap Iranian suit with an official Mahmoud Swag Bag™.

Lieutenant Felix Carman confirmed the sailors were in Iraqi waters when they were detained by Iran. “We were 1.7 nautical miles from Iranian waters,” he said.

The sailors and marines said they were bound, blindfolded and lined up against a wall while weapons were cocked, making them “fear the worst”.

Good L-rd! Blindfolds and cocked guns? Goodness gracious me, it’s almost like they were caught in a war zone or something. I’m sure that wasn’t covered in their contract with the Royal Navy.

Apparently responding to criticisms that the sailors and marines surrendered too easily to the Iranians and were too eager to cooperate with their captors, they said that “fighting back was simply not an option”.

Which, coincidentally, sounds so much better in the original fwench.

“We were aware that many people have questioned why we allowed ourselves to be taken in the first place. From the outset it was very apparent that fighting back was not an option. Had we done that many of us would not be standing here today.

…with your swag bags, cheap suits, smiling faces and non-existent sacred honors.

“He who cowers and runs away, lives to cower another day.”

“There would have been a major fight, which we could not have won, and the consequences would have had a major strategic impact. We made a conscious decision not to engage the Iranians.”

Somehow, but we may just be too cynical for our own good here, we don’t think that there would have been a “major strategic impact” from 15 sailors fighting and, possibly, dying whilst defending themselves from aggression. We know, on the other hand, that there already is a major strategic impact from you sodding wankers playing suckup to Mahmoud Ahmadinnerjacket without as much as pretending to resist. Terrorists everywhere are laughing their arses off, knowing that all they have to do to defeat the Royal Marines is to say “boo”, and the Argies are already making aggressive noises about the Falklands again. And, given your recent demonstration of the impotence of the Royal Navy, who can blame them?

Somehow we get the, completely unwarranted and unfair we’re sure, feeling that you weren’t as concerned about hypothetical “major strategic impacts” as you were about the impact of bullets anywhere near your precious personal selves. Which is exactly the kind of primary concern you need in a soldier, of course. If you’re fwench.

Give us more, O Emperor! »

Comments 41 Comments »

Not, not this one, but the whimpering, puling poodle that used to be the Empire upon which the sun never set.

As we’re sure you know, Mahmoud Ahmadinnerjacket just announced that he is going to “graciously” release the 15 British hostages that he grabbed in an act of war and piracy on the high seas, and he’s playing it for all it’s worth:

“On the occasion of the birthday of the great prophet (Muhammad) … and for the occasion of the passing of Christ, I say the Islamic Republic government and the Iranian people — with all powers and legal right to put the soldiers on trial — forgave those 15,” he said, referring to the Muslim prophet’s birthday on March 30 and the Easter season.

The New York Slimes and various and sundry other Islamofascist scrotum-licking “news” outlets praising Ahmadingdong as a “great statesman” and a “peacemaker” in 5…4…3…

The results of the standoff are in, and Mahmoud won.

  1. He has proven, beyond a reasonable doubt, that Britain doesn’t even rise to the status of “paper tiger.” Their personnel were abducted in an open act of piracy, an act of war, and Tony the Toothless Poodle didn’t, not once, find it in himself to do anything about it. Nothing. Not even a thinly veiled threat. Britain is not a “paper tiger”, it’s a “candy floss chihuahua.” From here on out, he and his terrorist allies know that they can get away with anything.
  2. He has proven, beyond a reasonable doubt, that the U.N. is every bit as useless as anybody with a brain has known for ages. Heck, they couldn’t even get themselves worked up enough about an unprovoked act of war to “deplore” it, much less actually do something.
  3. He now gets to parade around the world stage, presenting himself as a magnanimous leader forgiving his enemies for their “trespasses”, not to mention the chutzpah he’s showing in calling himself “generous” for handing back victims of a hostage situation that he himself instigated.
  4. His terrorist allies will be wildly emboldened by their idol sticking his finger squarely in the eye of the West and getting away with it. Not only getting away with it, but scoring an enormous propaganda victory as well. As a result we will see more, not less of the same in the future. Why wouldn’t we? Our enemies now know that they can abduct our citizens at will with absolutely no consequences at all.
  5. As a side bonus, this crisis of Ahmadinnerjacket’s own making caused oil prices to rise significantly, making him and his terrorist regime richer in the process.

We are, of course, happy for the 15 who will soon be heading home, but at what price?

We’ll see soon enough, and sooner than we’d like too.

The West had war declared on them, and the West surrendered without firing a shot.

Even the fwench aren’t that cowardly, spineless, worthless and utterly without merit.

Shame on us, shame on all of us and G-d help us.

We’re going to need His help, seeing as how we obviously don’t have anything resembling leaders to look to here on Earth.

Comments 94 Comments »