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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Archive for Useless Swine
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Archive for the “Useless Swine” Category

The Senate voted on an amendment expressing their support for GEN Petraeus and condemning sewer-dwelling bottom-feeders (that would be, to those of you who have spent the last decade on Neptune) slandering a highly decorated member of the Armed Forces, and the result of the vote was very… informative.

Please keep in mind that this is the same general who was confirmed unanimously by the same backstabbing lunatics voting against today’s amendment.

Also keep in mind that one of the 25 NAYs belongs to the Hildevermin, the beast from the darkest corners of Hell who wants to be Commander-in-Chief of the armed forces that she obviously has no problem with impugning the honor and integrity of at every turn.

No surprise, really, after all she already called GEN Petraeus a liar to his face, but certainly something that needs to be repeated again and again.

As to the other 24 NAYs?

We’ll remember you as well.

We’ll remember you very well indeed.

Comments 100 Comments »

We couldn’t be happier if we tried. One of the fraudulent land shark leeches, robbing companies of billions of dollars every year with fraudulent, manufactured lawsuits, is about to go to the big house.

We completely agree with LC & IB Sithmonkey when he says:

I hope this guy gets mounted like a breeder cow while serving his time (or lack thereof).

All we’d add is that we hope that the breeder stud is unusually and frighteningly well “equipped.”

Comments 20 Comments »

We just read about the Cankled Hildebeest telling GEN Petraeus that believing his testimony requires “a willing suspension of disbelief.”

Now, we know full well that a large proportion of adults today were “educated” by the publik skool sistem and, as a result, have less of a grasp of the English language and the meaning of words than King Tut (and he had an excuse, since the language hadn’t been invented yet), but some of us are still quite capable of translating that artfully disguised slander to its Plain English meaning.

She is, in short, saying that GEN Petraeus is lying, and the fact that he was under oath at the time only makes the slander worse. Actionable, we’d say, if we happened to live in a country with an actual justice system, one that applied equally to politicians. But we don’t.

It doesn’t change the obvious fact that the Hildebeest is a lying, slanderous, filthy bitch who ought to have been taken to the vet ages ago, but we knew that already.

The only comfort lies in the sweet, sweet, miles-thick irony of a Clinton accusing anybody of lying.

Oh, Hildebeest: Those dirty funds you got from Hsu that you’re now sending back, not to return them but to let the donors re-launder them so you can have them back again, not to mention your recent hire of known felon, spy and traitor Sandy (Pants)burglar as a senior national security advisor…

How’s that all working out for you, you malodorous sow?

Thought nobody would notice, did you?

Comments 56 Comments »

(Via LC & IB Tim Blair)

Original Big Brother contestant Gordon Sloan has died in Beijing after collapsing in mysterious circumstances 12 days ago.

Sloan, who starred in the first series of the reality show in 2001, died at 1pm (AEST) yesterday at a city hospital.

ninemsn understands the 34-year-old architect was admitted on September 1 and was in a coma when he died.

Sources told ninemsn drugs were suspected in the death and that Sloan might have taken an overdose or been deliberately drugged by another person.

“Mysterious circumstances” my arse. Obviously, having failed his hero Saddam Insane years ago, he decided to follow him into Hell to act as his human shield there instead.

Note to Sloan: Running for the hills won’t be an option down there, but you probably know that by now. Mheh.

Comments 12 Comments »

Found this at The Imperial BlogSis’ place, and though she covers it most excellently, we have to let off an Imperial vent as well, if for nothing else, then to get our Imperial Blood Pressure under control.

Schools Chancellor Joel Klein yesterday vowed to investigate a Queens high school policy that may have cost a teen girl her health.

Stand by, LCs, and remove any and all weapons and heavy, throwable objects, because you’re not going to fucking believe this:

The Daily News reported yesterday an official at Jamaica High School barred school deans from calling 911 in an emergency - just weeks before 14-year-old Mariya Fatima suffered a stroke her family says could have been less devastating.

Former Jamaica Assistant Principal Guy Venezia sent a memo to school deans on April 12 banning 911 calls “for any reason.”

Mariya began to vomit at school on April 27 and collapsed in the hall, but her family says help did not arrive until 90 minutes later.

So just how devastating was this outrage to be poor girl’s health?

Since her stroke, Mariya has had trouble walking. She has no use of her right hand, and her family says the 10th-grader is reading at a fifth-grade level.

So let’s recap: The subhuman ASSistant Principal, for reasons so far known only to his diseased, end stage syphilitic brain, bans 911 calls “for any reason”, leading to a poor young girl suffering a stroke having to wait for an hour and a half before help arrives. Summoned, presumably, by use of a carrier pigeon, smoke signals or semaphore from the school roof.

By now, we’re sure that you’re as dying to find out what inane, craptastically submoronic reason the ASSistant Principal had for denying medical aid to students in a medical emergency as we were. Bring on the Dumb Excuse Brigades™:

Mariya’s lawyer Gary Carlton blamed the pressure on principals to improve school safety - or at least to give the appearance that they had.

A 911 call leaves a paper trail that can’t be covered up, and Jamaica was already on the city’s list of most dangerous schools.

“This happened because statistics are more important than anyone’s life,” Carlton said.

And the Publik Skoool “Teachers’” Union, of course, concurs:

Teachers union President Randi Weingarten made a similar allegation. “This is a tragic result of what happens when everything comes down to data,” she said. “If there’s only a hammer when people report crime, then people are going to continue to hide their incidents.”

No, you stupid c*nt, this is a tragic result of what happens when subretarded wastes of skin who shouldn’t be allowed near any job requiring an IQ above 40 are instead hired on as teachers because such jobs don’t exist. But no, instead of placing the blame squarely where it belongs, namely on the shoulders of that simian sucknozzle ASSistant Principal, it’s time to “blame the syyyyyyyyyyyystem.” Fuck you, cow, and fuck your complete and utter lack of morals and professional ethics.

Is it any wonder why more and more people won’t trust you drooling, overpaid and underworked bipedal organisms of unknown usefulness with their children?

The city, most likely because parents have an interest in the subject, decide to run statistics of how many calls to 911 are placed by individual schools. I know, how horrible is that? It’s like the NSA rifling through your library records and spending all day listening to your phone conversations with your senile aunt Maple. But hey, who knows, maybe parents do have a right to know whether their children’s prospective school is home to cops on a more frequent basis than the local police station?

So the ASSistant Principal, hoping to cover up his cesspool of a “school’s” similarities with pre-Surge Anbar, decides to lie and game the system by banning 911 calls “for any reason”, presumably because he knows that parents don’t like sending their kids to Beirut for their education, and that if they don’t send any kids, then he’s out of a job. In other words, he made a choice between his paycheck and the safety of the children entrusted to his care, and the paycheck won.

And you, you inexcusably horrid bovine, immediately scream “it’s not his faaaaaaaault!, Blame the SYYYYYYSTEM!!!”

Is the ban still in effect? If so, I assume that, were a particularly enraged citizen to show up on school grounds with an AK-47, intent on conducting a little staff “review” with an eye to “relocation” of particularly daft staffers (downwards, to someplace very nice and hot, if you must have a hint), then “no 911 calls for any reason” would still apply?

Great. Sounds like fun.


I found a copy of the second memo where the second line had been changed from

“All Deans are prohibited from making 911 calls for any reason”  


“All Deans are sanctioned to make 911 calls”


Comments 51 Comments »

Now I’m openly questioning their right to continue breathing, and no, that’s not hyperbole (be sure to check your BP before clicking the link, provided to me by LCs Crunchie and Rurik).

Seriously, you fucknuggets, do you have a death wish? If so, I’m reaching the point where I’d be more than happy to help you out.

Is that how you express your “dissent?” By pissing on the graves of fallen heroes?

It’s time to put you in yours, so that we may return the favor, because I’ve had it way past “up to here.” Perhaps it’s time to establish citizen vigils around memorials, vigils made up of heavily armed, seriously pissed off citizens with absolutely no compunctions about smashing your filthy faces into the concrete and doing a jackbooted Mazurka on the back of your necks.

I, for one, volunteer.

UPDATE: As we were going through the Imperial mailbox, we found an email from LC Mithglin related to this subject. First of all, we apologize that we didn’t get the update up sooner, but here it is. The above desecration may have been a cleaning accident and not a desecration at all. The source is certainly credible, and we hope that it’s true, since it would mean that our nation hasn’t completely lost its mind yet:

Correction on Vietnam Wall Defacement

Patriots and Comrades All:

After several attempts, I was able to contact SGT Booker
of the National Park Service (NPS), to check on the facts
about the defacement of the Vietnam Wall last weekend. He
explained it was a cleaning accident by a Park Ranger and
NOT a defacement as was originally reported by the Vietnam
Veterans of American (VVA). The NPS is regarding this as
an accident instead of an act of vandalism or terrorism.

Our National Commander Patriot Henry Cook III has the
direct phone numbers for SGT Booker of the NPS, and can
verify these facts with him directly. A copy of this
correction is also being sent the VVA for their follow up
and verification. My apology for the error, as sometimes
it is not always possible to reach the NPS immediately.

Any future report of attempted or actua l vandalism will
be verified with the NPS in advance, even if that means a
significant delay in reporting the incident.

Yours in Patriotism,

Steve Cobb
Region I, MOPH
NE/Mid-Atlantic USA
Military Order of the Purple Heart

It would also explain why security hadn’t noticed any acts of vandalism in progress, since there would have been nothing to notice in the first place.

Comments 55 Comments »

This one caught my attention. There is just no way to overestimate STOOPID.

Oversalted Burger Leads To Charges

A McDonald’s employee spent a night in jail and is facing criminal charges because a police officer’s burger was too salty, so salty that he says it made him sick.

Obviously Ronald McDonald is working in the kitchen now, besides entertaining the kiddies at the Playland.

Kendra Bull was arrested Friday, charged with misdemeanor reckless conduct and freed on $1,000 bail.

Yes Virginia, stupid can be illegal in the right context. Call me confused here, the headline stated she spent a night in jail, but now you tell me she made bail. The idea of setting bail (or a bond) is that by surrendering some moolah, you don’t stay in the bucket before an arraignment. I’m certainly not familiar with local procedures, but up here, that $1000 could be in the form of a 1) Promise to Appear signature, with no cash money actually surrendered, 2) a bondsman could post 10% of the set bail or 3) A cash bond that is the full amount.

Law enforcement officers have quite a bit of discretionary powers normally and I just can’t see why he would go out of his way to make a custodial arrest for a minor misdemeanor charge unless something said really pissed him off.

Bull, 20, said she accidentally spilled salt on hamburger meat and told her supervisor and a co-worker, who “tried to thump the salt off.”

This has to be a joke right? The three stooges trying to get a shit-load of salt off a lump of ground beef. Having worked with ground beef on rather more than a few occasions, it’s not very practical to ‘thump’ it once you’ve dumped something onto the sticky mass. Perhaps they were drawing on ‘life experience’ dealing with thumping-off meat. Why in bog’s name the idiots didn’t throw it out is beyond me. Guess we’ll add dumber to the list along with a super-size side of stupid.

On her break, she ate a burger made with the salty meat. “It didn’t make me sick,” Bull told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution.

Kendra obviously has a refined taste for sweaty salty meat and her digestive system’s response to it’s side effects.

But then Police Officer Wendell Adams got a burger made with the oversalted meat, and he returned a short time later and told the manager it made him sick.

Bull admitted spilling salt on the meat, and Adams took her outside and questioned her, she said.

No doubt the outside conversation and attitude by the accused, led to the arrest. Something just tells me the latter constituted about 80% of the decision. Note to Idiotarians Everywhere: Polite goes a long way with pissed-off police, big-balls gets you something that won’t be pleasant, trust me.

“If it was too salty, why did (Adams) not take one bite and throw it away?” said Bull, who has worked at the restaurant for five months. She said she didn’t know a police officer got one of the salty burgers because she couldn’t see the drive-through window from her work area.

Thus displaying the exact attitude that got her pinched. Silly Sow. As an aside, if you’ve ever seen a cop on a busy night trying to get some chow, eating is an event that occurs at world class Olympic speed. My first wingman could mange a Triple Quarter-Pounder with cheese in three bites in under 60 seconds without a belch in between.

Police said samples of the burger were sent to the state crime lab for tests.

Smart move, any bets that the meat was dropped onto the floor during the ‘thumping’ process?

City public information officer George Louth said Bull was charged because she served the burger “without regards to the well-being of anyone who might consume it.”

Reckless endangerment fits quite well into Bull-Shit-For-Brain’s, little meat thumping stunt. Let’s hope the city health department gets out their inspection proctoscope to visit that place a few times. I’m surprised the supervisor and co-worker weren’t charged as well.


Comments 75 Comments »

John Edwards showing the size estimate of his “My Little Dream Pony Testicles.”

Edwards’ Cabinet list includes GOP names

The inhumanity of it all…say it isn’t so, the Democraps’ first metro-sexual candidate couldn’t possibly have even a RINO in his cabinet. Don’t worry citizens of the Empire, I’m sure he’ll clarify this shortly, it was a day-dream he had whilst having his latest coiffure. He dreamt that big, bad Fred was hiding in his closet [not cabinet], right next to the year’s supply of hair-spray, waiting to shout boo !!!!

Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards carries a running list of people he might put in his Cabinet, and it includes “more than one” Republican.

Ron Paul and Olympia Snowe?

“I want to be ready for when I get sworn in,” the former North Carolina senator said between campaigns stops as he dug into a travel bag for the list.

Looking for his little dog, Toto.

“I might have it with me,” Edwards told The Associated Press. “I wouldn’t show it to you, but I could have it with me.”

Show me yours and I’ll show you mine, but I have to run home and get Elizabeth first, her’s is bigger and I still haven’t found mine anyway.

He didn’t hand over the list, nor did he commit to putting Republicans in his Cabinet.

So why in the name of Fidel’s Lice Infested Beard™, does the headline make an affirmative declaration that it does?

“No, because the test for me is not whether they’re Democratic or Republican. The test is how competent they are and whether they’re the best person for the job, and to make a decision about who’s best to choose you have to spend time talking to them,” said the 2004 Democratic vice presidential candidate.

Absolutely, you positively must be sure a potential cabinet member agrees with you on haircare and personal hygiene products. After all, the cabinet meeting restroom can only stock one variety of tampons.

Would he name a Republican vice presidential nominee?

“I don’t think so because my view about Cabinet positions is different than the vice presidency,” Edwards said. “I think the vice president needs to be someone who shares my vision for the country and that’s much more likely, obviously, to be a Democrat.”

Of course not, a republican, any republican would highlight my utter lack of testosterone.

Edwards didn’t go as far as rival Bill Richardson, who has said that as the Democratic nominee he would give voters a preview of his Cabinet before Election Day.

Only because the Village People weren’t available for a photo opportunity.

“It would have independents, Republicans and Democrats. Don’t worry, I won’t overdo the Republicans,” Richardson told a Democratic audience in July.

Richardson? Presidential Cabinet? Bill, you do know that will give you warts and make you go blind, right?

Also on Saturday, Edwards dismissed critics who question his sincerity and point to stories about his pricey hair cut, big home and hedge fund job.

They are such bruuuuthes aren’t they Johnny?

“They’re look for something to criticize about. It’s what comes with running for president. If you’re not ready to be criticized, you shouldn’t run for president,” Edwards said. “I mean, I know who I am. I know I haven’t changed at all. I’m the same person I’ve always been.”

No disagreement there at all. None. You’re still a two-bit malpractice shyster that channels dead babies and panders juries into millions of dollar punitive damages, at the cost of good doctor’s careers. A left-wing socialist, frothing moon-bat that plays every class divisive card in the book without shame, while hiding behind the skirts of your wife’s unfortunate illness for insulation.

Do us all a favor, drop out now, get yourself a nice manicure, pedicure and even some new frilly thongs from the Victoria’s Secret catalog. You’ll feel much better.

Comments 33 Comments »

Here’s the full, uncut version of Keith Olberdouche Osama has-been Laden Lookalike’s latest remix.

Of course, if you’re familiar with the talking points of the KosKidz, the DNC and various and sundry liberal anchors/politicians, you won’t learn a thing from watching it, as it’s pretty much a verbatim transcript of anything they’ve ever said, only in the original Arabic.

Comments 23 Comments »

This just in, thanks to Sir Christopher:

WASHINGTON - Chuck Hagel will announce Monday that he is retiring from the U.S. Senate and will not run for president next year, people close to the Nebraska Republican said Friday.

Dammit. Dammit, dammit, DAMMIT!

Why, in the name of Alexander the Great’s abused sphincter, do I have to learn about this at this time of day, with several hours left before I can, in good conscience, pop open a bottle of sparkly?

Goodbye, Chuck Hagel Schmekel, and good riddance to bad rubbish.

Comments 11 Comments »