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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Oh, THOSE WMDs!
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(H/t LC Cheapshot911)

Proof of cooperation between Iran and Syria in the proliferation and development of weapons of mass destruction was brought to light Monday in Jane’s Defence Weekly, which reported that dozens of Iranian engineers and 15 Syrian officers were killed in a July 23 accident in Syria.

Note to the Jerusalem Post: That’s not an “accident”, it’s called “The Hand of G-d.”

According to the report, cited by Channel 10, the joint Syrian-Iranian team was attempting to mount a chemical warhead on a Scud missile when the explosion occurred, spreading lethal chemical agents, including sarin nerve gas.

That’s horrible!!!

As far as we know, sarin kills quickly and painlessly. Bummer.

(UPDATE: Muzzy informs us in the comments that we may have our data screwed up on that last point:

Initial symptoms following exposure to sarin are a runny nose, tightness in the chest and constriction of the pupils. Soon after, the victim has difficulty breathing and experiences nausea and drooling. As the victim continues to lose control of bodily functions, he vomits, defecates and urinates. This phase is followed by twitching and jerking. Ultimately, the victim becomes comatose and suffocates in a series of convulsive spasms.

Thanks, Muzzy, you just saved our day and put a giant, shit-eating grin on our face! :D )

Syria began developing chemical weapons in 1973, just before the Yom Kipper War. Globalsecurity.org cites the country as having one of the most advanced chemical weapons programs in the Middle East.

Yom Kippur is coming up this Saturday, by the way.

What a nice anniversary present for Pencilneck Assad and his goons.

So, liberals, do those WMDs exist, or are they also a figment of our imaginations? If so, that would make for a really nifty epitaph for the dead Syrians and Iranians: “Here Lie a Bunch of Thugs, Terrorists and Fuckwits, Killed by a Figment of the Neocons’ Imaginations.”

That rascal Assad. Pelosi and Kucinich sure do know how to pick their new bestest buddies, don’t they?

But don’t question their patriotism.

44 Responses to “Oh, THOSE WMDs!”
  1. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    Why do I get this mental image of God setting on his throne, watching all of this unfold, and trying to supress a gut busting laugh?

  2. BigDogg Comment by BigDogg

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    “Hey Akhmed … do you know what the hole in this canister is for?”

    “No Ali, I don’t … I think it has something to do with making a big bang.”

    A big bang, hmmm? …. Ummmm, it does remind me of my favorite goat, Riza …. I wonder what would happen if I …”

    *zzzzzzip* …. *squeak**squeak**squeak* ….

    BOOOOMMMMMMM

    :em99: :em99: :em99:

  3. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

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    It gets better: http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3451415,00.html

    An amazing coincidence

    Proximity of explosion at Syrian plant to site of ‘Israeli air strike’ startling

  4. Rat Bastard Comment by Rat Bastard

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    Damn work Accidents!!!!!!!

  5. Muzzy Comment by Muzzy

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    As far as we know, sarin kills quickly and painlessly. Bummer.

    It may be quick, but it most certainly isn’t painless. From Wikipedia:

    Initial symptoms following exposure to sarin are a runny nose, tightness in the chest and constriction of the pupils. Soon after, the victim has difficulty breathing and experiences nausea and drooling. As the victim continues to lose control of bodily functions, he vomits, defecates and urinates. This phase is followed by twitching and jerking. Ultimately, the victim becomes comatose and suffocates in a series of convulsive spasms.

    Fascinating stuff, Sarin. It causes an acetylcholine buildup in the synapses. Acetylcholine is the enzyme responsible for the transmission of stimulating impulses to the muscles. Without acetylcholine, your brain wouldn’t be able to send the signals necessary to inflate your lungs. In the normal run of things, the body releases a second chemical called acetylcholinesterase to neutralise the acetylcholine, allowing the muscle to relax. Sarin stops the acetylcholinesterase dead in its tracks, causing the aforementioned acetylcholine buildup. The end result is uncontrollable muscle spasms which force suffocation. In some cases, the intensity of the spasms is sufficient to break the victim’s back. Sarin is one of the nastiest chemicals on the planet, but it is rather elegant in its operation.

  6. LC Mike in Chi Comment by LC Mike in Chi

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    More glorious martyrs for allah the moon monster.

    Ali: Aren’t we supposed to use hoses to fill these rockets?
    Mo: Shuttup camel dung and give me a light…this cheap Korean hookah keeps goin’ out.

    Blam-Ooo
    Hey Mahmoud, Nancy, Dennis, there’s an extra hose or two on those things for you to suck on.
    Ahmadingdong should get his visit to Ground Zero like the last Arab touring party…at 500mph with a few tons of jet fuel wrapped around him.

    Always a good day when Iran loses field techs wholesale and shoves shoeleather into the screaching LLLs gob.

    Allah FUBAR!

  7. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    Leaving all joking aside for a moment, Syria could only have two possible targets for those chemical armed Scud’s - Israel, and our troups in Iraq.

    Since the stated policy of both countries is to answer any WMD attack with OUR WMDs, and since we don’t HAVE any chemical weapons anymore, this may be interesting. In the sense of the old Chinese curse, that is.

  8. LC Mike in Chi Comment by LC Mike in Chi

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    LC Elchonon, ICCD sez:

    It gets better:

    Proximity of explosion at Syrian plant to site of ‘Israeli air strike’ startling

    Talk about hangin’ a “Hit Me” sign on your own self!

    “Hey Shlomo, something went bang in Syria and the MoMos are chattering up a storm about it.”
    “Let’s go take a look see for ourselves…it might be a target rich opportunity!”

  9. Unregistered Comment by DukeFenton

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    Not that it really matters, but interesting:

    If memory serves, Saddam declared possession of about 2300 liters of sarin in 1993. This is one of numerous items whose disposition he failed to allow UN inspectors to document. We also know that numerous trucks headed to Syria with unknown cargoes before the US invasion.

    In early 2004, a bunch of goblins (specifically, operatives taking orders from Zarqawi of the al Quaeda that ‘didn’t exist’ in Iraq) were stopped from killing the entire Jordanian government and about 20,000 people with an attack that would have involved about 1500 liters of sarin. (Most folks don’t know this because the MSM started riding the Abu Ghraib hobby horse the *very next day* and for the next 2 months.) Said agent is thought to have been brought in from - you guessed it - Syria.

    Now, following the logical supposition (which DJ and the other pro bono defense lawyers for hadjis will call a ridiculous conspiracy theory), I wonder how much of he 800 or so liters remaining are still in Syria, and how much might have gone up in one of the two recent kabooms?

    Time to send in *OUR* ‘inspectors’ to find out… :em95:

  10. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    …and since we don’t HAVE any chemical weapons anymore,

    I am SO not going to go there. :em93:

    But you are, of course, absolutely right. Yessir, you are.

  11. LC Mike in Chi Comment by LC Mike in Chi

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    I’ll go there.

    …and since we don’t HAVE any chemical weapons anymore, this may be interesting.

    Oh yes we do.

    The U.S. Record to Date on CW Destruction…
    # Have concentrated on destroying our most lethal weapons first, specifically VX and sarin nerve agent, with over 86% of the latter already destroyed. Will finish destruction of binary agents – our most modern stocks – by the end of 2007>.(emp. mine)

    Well, maybe we do and maybe we will.

  12. Hardclimber54 Comment by Hardclimber54

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    I CANNOT wait to see how the media slugs and bleeding-hearts of all ilk and kind will try to blame this on the Western nations :em99: Here is an “non-existent long range missile being fitted with a non-existent chemical warhead” in a country where lefties and bleeding-hearts have used taxpayers dollars visiting their “leaders” for “talks”. You, my American friends, know the “representatives” who were so anxious to associate with these monkeys. We’ve had people daring to call themselves Canadians, snuggling up to these repulsive turds as well. I wonder if they’ll be sending condoleances to the camel-screwing murderous boogers over this..? :em72: Anyway, at least the best part in all of this is that a bunch of officers and technicians have received their just reward and won’t be used to further the political terrorism of both Syria :em72: and Iran :em72: I am with LC Wil on the idea of what precise targets these were intended to be used against. Bet you, the insurgents would have received a load of these weapons, compliments of the Tooth Fairy, with Syria and Iran “vehemently” protesting their origin. And the civilized world is allowing their “representatives” to go and talk to these camel-dropping sickos!?!?!? :em41: I would like to know what the world has been eating since 2001, seems to affect honour, decency, common-sense and courage. :em41: :em38: :em41:

  13. DJ Allyn,  ITW Comment by DJ Allyn, ITW

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    Now, following the logical supposition

    Which in your case is rather subjective, since you get to dictate what is logical or not

    (which DJ and the other pro bono defense lawyers for hadjis will call a ridiculous conspiracy theory),

    Oh, I could think of several conspiracy theories which would make them just about as factual as yours. In other words, a theory is just that: An assumption based on limited information or knowledge — a conjecture.

    I wonder how much of he 800 or so liters remaining are still in Syria, and how much might have gone up in one of the two recent kabooms?

    Well, considering that Syria has been manufacturing these chemicals since the early seventies, what makes you so sure that this 800 or so liters ever made it into Syria? Other than your conjecture, that is:

    We also know that numerous trucks headed to Syria with unknown cargoes before the US invasion. [emphasis mine]

    The thing about “unknown” is that it really means that you don’t know. You don’t know IF there was a cargo, or what it was IF there was a cargo. It leaves itself wide open for speculation, but usually for simply guessing.

    Also, isn’t it convenient that if we were tracking such convoys, that we stopped watching where they went to once they hit the Syrian border?

    Don’t you think that if we seriously thought they contained WMD we would be a little more than interested in where they ended up? We would have been stuck to them like stink on shit if we thought they contained weapons.

    I doubt they even existed. We already know that this administration would cook the books to get their little war started. We didn’t have actual photos of those “mobile chemical labs” so Powell had to use a sketch to “prove” they existed. They relied on faked documents concerning yellowcake from Nigeria (probably from the same person that provided Dan Rather with his documents)

    Hardclimber54: Is there a need for all of those emoticons?

  14. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    But don’t question their patriotism.

    Right up there with Unicorns, Oz and white rabbits wearing waistcoats.

  15. Muzzy Comment by Muzzy

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    You’re quite welcome, Misha :-)

  16. Trooper THX1138 Comment by Trooper THX1138

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    a theory is just that: An assumption based on limited information or knowledge — a conjecture.

    Was science not your best subject DJ? What you described is an hypothesis: A step backwards in deductive reasoning. A theory, on the other hand, is that hypothesis which, after testing, best fits the data.

    Also, isn’t it convenient that if we were tracking such convoys, that we stopped watching where they went to once they hit the Syrian border?

    Don’t you think that if we seriously thought they contained WMD we would be a little more than interested in where they ended up? We would have been stuck to them like stink on shit if we thought they contained weapons.

    Oh my, DJ, are you retroactively advocating invading a sovereign country on merely the suspicion on having WMDs? If it was wrong to merely enter Cambodia while fighting the Vietnam War, why is it not wrong to enter Syrian airspace without permission?

    Of course, that assumes terrestrial or airborne tracking. I’m sure we could have had satellites overhead, but do we REAAALLY want to advertise our full capabilities to our enemies? Might be better to hide certain assets and sacrifice short-term gains to maintain long-term advantages, and to have our enemies underestimate us. Might not be kosher in a court of law, but then, warfare, both overt and covert, doesn’t exactly follow Queensbury rules.

    Don’t waste time trying to guess what your enemy WILL do, (that’s better left to geniuses like the Chiss Grand Admiral Mitth’raw’nuruodo) but instead plan for what your enemy CAN do. Sounds better when Fat Tony reads it from Sun Tzu.

  17. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

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    DJ,
    Maybe syria did / does mnfctr chemical weapons, however Israeli inteligance experts all said that sadam was trucking his goods to syria before the US invaded.

  18. TheBoid Comment by TheBoid

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    The link Mike provided says that the US has the 2nd largest stockpile of chemical weapons. Who has the largest?

  19. Dick Comment by Dick

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    Misha, just to make ya feel even better. Depending on the agent involved, and I never was trained on Sarin, so I don’t know about it.
    The spasms and convulsions can be so extreme as to snap the victim’s spine. Sometimes, in more than one place.

    Happy Thoughts!!!

  20. Dick Comment by Dick

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    The link Mike provided says that the US has the 2nd largest stockpile of chemical weapons. Who has the largest?

    Probably the Soviets still have the largest stockpile. Their war doctrine against the US was built around chemical warfare.

  21. Unregistered Comment by Mark6591

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    Hey, DJ, you are rapidly becoming the Stanley Cohen of the Rott.

    http://www.discoverthenetworks.org/individualProfile.asp?indid=627

  22. Hardclimber54 Comment by Hardclimber54

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    If you’ll excuse this comment from the peanut gallery, I heard about “Mr” Cohen and his habit of “only taking a case if he agrees with his client’s politics”. Just curious though, does he get paid in US dollars or in dinars. Client’s politics but US money. Just a thought…

  23. Unregistered Comment by mindy1

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    Oh well, at least they can’t call OSHA. I don’t normally like it when people die, but I can change my mind can’t I :em99:

  24. Radical Redneck Comment by Radical Redneck

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    Hey, DJ, you are rapidly becoming the Stanley Cohen of the Rott.

    Why are the most useful idiots for the anti-semetic Islamofascists always Jews? That is some Twilight Zonishly™ unhinged self loathing there. :em95:

    Liberalism - Philosophy of the Stupid™ :em72:

  25. Mad Insomniac Comment by Mad Insomniac

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    The thing about “unknown” is that it really means that you don’t know. You don’t know IF there was a cargo, or what it was IF there was a cargo. It leaves itself wide open for speculation, but usually for simply guessing.

    Maybe I read “The Little Engine That Could” (”The Little Convoy That Could”?) a few too many times when I was a kid, but I’m guessing that Saddam’s trucks were carrying toys, games, and good things for all the little boys and girls to eat.

    Also, I’m moving to Nebraska, and you won’t believe the deal I got on some ocean-front property - only $5M per acre. The guy I bought it from told me that it would triple in value within 6 months, since ocean-front property is so rare in that state.

    I think I can… I think I can… I think I can….

  26. DJ Allyn,  ITW Comment by DJ Allyn, ITW

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    Was science not your best subject DJ? What you described is an hypothesis: A step backwards in deductive reasoning. A theory, on the other hand, is that hypothesis which, after testing, best fits the data.

    I did very well at science — still do. But DukeFenton wasn’t employing science — he was working from his gut feelings. When I gave my definition of ” Theory “, I used definition number six because it best fit the description.

    Oh my, DJ, are you retroactively advocating invading a sovereign country on merely the suspicion on having WMDs? If it was wrong to merely enter Cambodia while fighting the Vietnam War, why is it not wrong to enter Syrian airspace without permission?

    [in my best Donald Rumsfeld impression…] My stars, why yes! Besides, we supposedly took the pictures of those trucks with satellite, didn’t we? And since when has a mere annoyance such as a border stopped us from flying high overhead of any country?

    but do we REAAALLY want to advertise our full capabilities to our enemies?

    Oh stop it! I don’t think there is a third grade child that doesn’t know we can damn near read a newspaper from space, let alone see a fucking convoy of trucks.

    Heck, even Google can deliver that sooper sekrit technology we don’t want the Syrians to know about:


    View Larger Map

    Yes that is a map of Baghdad. Gee, do ya think I could see a truck convoy?

  27. LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech Comment by LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech

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    Oh stop it!

    Too bad the military intel’ couldn’t be more like nyt?

    Yep, military resolution is much much higher, all the way to classified,,but y’see,,the trucks were baggin’ ass like cockroaches scattered waaay out across the boonies,,towards syria.

    B’sides, whilst wrangling how many nother-nother-resolutions, ‘think maybe we gave them time enough to spirit out the best stuff?

    What’s the risk of discounting that possibility?

  28. Unregistered Comment by big dufus

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    I’m pretty sure the official US response to any state actor using any WMD is nuclear.

    We’ll probably keep a quantity of chemweps if only for testing possible antidotes.

    We definately keep bioweps at Ft Dietrich near Frederick, MD.

    Neither of those would be used in retaliation for a variety of reasons, but mostly we would nuke so the rest of the world could see bright and clear that this is the wind they would reap if another state actor committed that crime against humanity.

    Debka has a post that Syria’s statement on 9/18 could signal an attack on Israel or other Jewish targets outside of Israel during Yom Kippur.

  29. cmblake6 Comment by cmblake6

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    But don’t question their patriotism.

    My only question there is…To Whom? :em12:

  30. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

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    Why are the most useful idiots for the anti-semetic Islamofascists always Jews? That is some Twilight Zonishly™ unhinged self loathing there.

    Hardly, jews tend to be apologetic by nature because we are mercifull, me personaly i’d spid on the arab after killing him.

    It was the west however and the east that has always presured israel.

    The spineless cunts here are actualy being such because they are scared of the US.

  31. Unregistered Comment by jmon

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    They blew up one of their own Baby Milk Factories? Cool.

    …and since we don’t HAVE any chemical weapons anymore,

    There’s a Shitload of that nasty crap about 50 miles West (Upwind) of where I’m at right now. The friggin’ Hippies complain that the site and it’s infrastructure are deteriorating, but have campaigned against the Military destroying it.

    It may harm the environment after it’s incinerated, Ya’ know.

  32. Ralph Gizzip Comment by Ralph Gizzip

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    It’s too bad Pelosi and Kucinich weren’t visiting the facility when the imaginary WMD’s went off.

  33. Serious Sean Comment by Serious Sean

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    Attempting to give a fuck…

    Serves ‘im right- killing two birds with one stone here.

  34. Unregistered Comment by DukeFenton

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    First of all, I’d like to thank DJ for living down exactly to my expectations. :em93: The amusement provided by your predictability almost makes me sorry to know that the blood of the second Shoah will be on your hands (among others).

    Anyway, in answer to Trooper THX1138:

    Oh my, DJ, are you retroactively advocating invading a sovereign country on merely the suspicion on having WMDs?

    Despite DJ’s pretense of knowledge, it is not ‘known’ with certainty what Syria’s chemical weapons stockpile or production capacity is. (It is, after all, a closed nation run by a murderous totalitarian government, a fine point lost on DJ and Pantsy Lugosi alike.) Any such claim is mere conjecture - officially anyway; I would suspect, hope in fact, that our intel knows more than they’re telling. Ergo, DJ is either presenting mere conjecture as fact; or revealing classified information.

    See DJ, two can play that game. :em71:

    Of course, that assumes terrestrial or airborne tracking.

    Most info about trucks leaving for Syria come from ground witnesses in Iraq before the US invasion - who, one might consider, didn’t exactly have a hotline to report such things, and would have risked their lives if they had. And even with a satellite view, you can’t see what’s in a truck.

    What’s curious is DJ is willfully stultifying himself for the benefit of people who want to kill us all. Even infants learn early that if a thing isn’t where it was before, it must be somewhere else. Considering the recently discussed difficulty the US is having in destroying its CW, does anyone seriously think Saddam got rid of his? And we all know - because the libs repeat the mantra 1000 times a day - there are ‘no WMD’ in Iraq.

    If a chemical weapon is declared to exist, and it’s known that large numbers of trucks went to Syria, and then the same type of chemical weapon shows up in the hands of terrorists from Syria, the logical conclusion is obvious. Proven? No. But how many lives do you want to risk to defend a bunch of mass murderers?

  35. xenophobic Comment by xenophobic

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    mobile labs?

    Might want to compare to Powell’s drawing DJ.

  36. LC Robohobo Comment by LC Robohobo

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    DJ-

    We already know that this administration would cook the books to get their little war started.

    Prove it! Links? C’mon. And HuffinGlue Toast does not count as real news.

  37. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    Prove it! Links? C’mon. And HuffinGlue Toast does not count as real news.

    Yer wasting yer time. Last time he was asked, all we got was a pile of unsupported allegations, disproven “theories”, and recycled lies from the leftist cowards and socialist scum.

  38. NevadaDailySteve Comment by NevadaDailySteve

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    They relied on faked documents concerning yellowcake from Nigeria (probably from the same person that provided Dan Rather with his documents)

    Sorry to bust yer bubble on that one DJ but the administration did not rely on faked documents about uranium from Nigeria. Super secret agent man’s report actually found that Saddam was asking about yellowcake. And all he did was sit around drinking mint tea and being thankful to get away from wifey Valerie for awhile.

  39. Unregistered Comment by cheatee

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    Just registered here…I haven’t read all of the comments yet,so i may be repeating.

    I have to wonder if these are Syrian Chemical weapons….or Iraqi that came over the border prior to our invasion. Think we have learned our lesson and will stop advertising for a year prior to an invasion?

  40. Unregistered Comment by Mark6591

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    Do a quick search for “Iraq uranium found”. Almost 1.8 tons of low enriched Uranium FOUND IN IRAQ.

    http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=iraq+uranium+found

    No WMDs here. The prosecution rests. DJ, defend those terrorists.

  41. LC George guy, Prophet of Neofederalism Comment by LC George guy, Prophet of Neofederalism

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    Syria began developing chemical weapons in 1973, just before the Yom Kipper War.

    Yom Kipper: The Day of Herring.

  42. Unregistered Comment by DukeFenton

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    #39 by cheatee

    I have to wonder if these are Syrian Chemical weapons….or Iraqi that came over the border prior to our invasion.

    That’s a legitimate question, and unfortunately the answer is, “We don’t really know.” At least, if there is definitive information it hasn’t been made widely available. Syria certainly *could* be producing chemical weapons such as sarin and mustard gas - both rely of technology decades old and can be made from perfectly legal precursors. It’s known that Saddam *DID* produce both locally - not, as DJ and his ilk will tell you, buy them from Donald Rumsfeld years *after* using them in battle.

    The trick with CW’s, as our splodeydopes so obligingly demonstrated recently, is in the delivery systems - and for that Iraq is known to have turned to both Russia and Fwance for assistance. Syria presumably has gotten at least some technical assistance, if not actual materiel, from their long association with the Soviet Union / Russia.

    Best guess, from available information, is that Syria has both its own CW’s and some windfall leftovers from the Hussein regime. It would make sense to send out (plausibly deniable) foreign agents to use up the latter abroad, while saving the former for … future reference. It’s what I would do in their position.

  43. JeepThang Comment by JeepThang

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    Some of you are wondering what is the US’s policy in answering a WMD attack on allies or selves…
    I have the answer here..

    “The United States will continue to make clear that it reserves the right to respond with overwhelming force — including potentially nuclear weapons — to the use of [weapons of mass destruction] against the United States, our forces abroad, and friends and allies.”

  44. JeepThang Comment by JeepThang

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    OK.. I made it into a new and updated post found at this link to JediMed.

    I figured since it was a year old..