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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » OHNOES! CENTCOM Has PLANS!
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Like LC & IB Allahpundit (from whom we shamelessly, er, “organized” the link), we’re not quite sure whether this “scoop” from the eagle-eyed journaljizzmers at the BBC is the 6th or the 787th rerun, but they sure seem quite pleased with themselves:

US contingency plans for air strikes on Iran extend beyond nuclear sites and include most of the country’s military infrastructure, the BBC has learned.

It is understood that any such attack - if ordered - would target Iranian air bases, naval bases, missile facilities and command-and-control centres.

Somebody give those guys a friggin’ Pulitzer!

The U.S. has contingency plans for attacking a hostile country! Who the Hell leaked THAT? No, no, no, no, NOOOOOOO! All is lost! We’re done for! Our innermost sanctum of secrecy has been penetrated by those all-seeing, all-knowing Einsteins of the EUrinal Press!

Would it be too mean to let those bedwetting wankers know of the contingency plans we have for just about every single other nation and locale on the planet? Because if it doesn’t cause at least one sleepless night over there, it frankly isn’t worth it.

Tomorrow on the front page of BBC Online:

“Sources reveal to the BBC that the sun will rise in the east”

35 Responses to “OHNOES! CENTCOM Has PLANS!”
  1. Unregistered Comment by FredZ

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    US contingency plans for air strikes on the UK extend beyond nuclear sites and include most of the country’s military infrastructure, and include particularly the BBC.

    If only.

  2. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

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    Folks…a quick note from the soldier I help as a soldiers angel. I am worried about him, as I know we all are. From the front…..

    Well its good to here from you and I think you need to slow down and
    enjoy life a little more. I have missions seven days a week and I’m right
    next to Iran. Its a mess and our soldiers are getting killed and for
    the life of me I dont understand it all. I do what I have to do.
    I give money to the NRA at times
    but I’m not a member.
    Getting kicked off the net, Travis

  3. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    Will the BBC find out that we have contingency plans for a war in Upper Volta as well? Oh, the evil conspiracies of the DoD!

    Caveman,

    Its a mess and our soldiers are getting killed and for
    the life of me I dont understand it all. I do what I have to do.

    Sounds like he’s just going through a little down spot. It happens but it needs to be checked before it becomes dominant. Let him know that what it’s all for is the same thing it’s always been for, from 1776 until 2007, so that our descendants, and his, can hopefully live in a little bit safer world than we do.

    He can understand that, as evidenced by his concern for you despite his own situation;

    Well its good to here from you and I think you need to slow down and
    enjoy life a little more.

    “Not for ourselves alone…”

  4. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

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    That’s what gets me, crunchie…he’s getting shot at and he’s worried about me? He is so nice to my wife, kind of a substitute mom in a way. He’s twenty-eight, my wife fifty. He is from the Missouri Ozarks, loves dear hunting, shooting and kick boxing. Even invited me to visit someday. He was in a blue funk once before when his wife left him, she couldn’t handle the deployment. We all have ups and downs, Dear Johns suck. He knows this too, we talked about it. He has a daughter he loves more than anything, just saw her on leave a month ago. His recent redeployment may be part of it too. What magnificient souls they are, and yes, crunchie, I write him often. As I would and will your son if he is deployed over there. I would imagine the rotties would inundate him with letters…count me in on that. I love those guys.

  5. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

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    Dammit, I misspelled deer. Oh well, going to go write a letter and will pass on crunchies words of wisdom.

  6. Dick Comment by Dick

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    Some people need a sharp smack on the forehead.

  7. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    Caveman

    What magnificient souls they are, and yes, crunchie, I write him often. As I would and will your son if he is deployed over there. I would imagine the rotties would inundate him with letters…count me in on that. I love those guys.

    Thanks brother. If the time comes I think a letter or two would be very much appreciated.

    A dear John does hurt, I know. It sounds like he has coped well though. Our troops never cease to amaze me. Tell Travis that he has this Marine grunts prayers as well as yours, and I’m sure all of the LC’s.

  8. Cheapshot911 Comment by Cheapshot911

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    Somebody give those guys a friggin’ Pulitzer!

    I think it’s spelled putzpuller

  9. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    A dear John does hurt, I know. It sounds like he has coped well though.

    Hurt isn’t the half of it. Now couple that with a lonely grunt stuck in Hell for the duration with nothing but coming home to look forward to and you’ve got the makings of a tragedy.

    I feel a rant coming on on that very subject. That and the subject of stateside sluts with crotch itches a country mile wide who can’t keep their whoring knees together for the duration of one lousy deployment.

  10. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    Misha

    I feel a rant coming on on that very subject. That and the subject of stateside sluts with crotch itches a country mile wide who can’t keep their whoring knees together for the duration of one lousy deployment.

    Are you sure you weren’t at the RottFest Sire? BC, Jackboot and I had the same conversation about WestPac widows. You could always tell how many Marines were on float by how many newly “divorced” sluts were crowding the local meat markets. It made the special breed of cat who waited with the yellow ribbon on their flag poles all that more special.

  11. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

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    Misha…his, Travis, daughter is staying with his mother. She was left behind with nowhere to go, abandoned while he was overseas. Disgust doesn’t begin to describe my feelings. My wife sent him a ten pound box of fucking candy, cookies, all sorts of nice stuff. But he says he has what he needs. I sent him a personal hygene kit anyway…with a somewhat ribald note… But when his daughter was left behind. I can only imagine the helpless agony Travis felt. So she is a safe eleven year old. Travis talks of coming back to his restored 74′ Vette, buying a house, living with his daughter, and doing a great deal of deer hunting. But yes, what you mentioned is why I worry. I intend to stand with this man, just finished writing him a letter on line. I will write him daily now. He was down once, perked up, and wonders mostly. And the woman that dumped him will never know what a prize she truly had. It broke his heart. I don’t care how tough you are. But my concern is him, and I make damn sure he knows it………I think he is coming out of it slowly now…….

  12. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    Are you sure you weren’t at the RottFest Sire? BC, Jackboot and I had the same conversation about WestPac widows. You could always tell how many Marines were on float by how many newly “divorced” sluts were crowding the local meat markets.

    I definitely feel a rant coming on. Heck, you know what I’m talking about. There are few things more likely to fuck with the mind of a grunt than that, leading to all manner of accidents and other stupid shit LEADING TO GOOD PEOPLE GETTING KILLED. All because some randy, rancid cunt can’t wait to get her furrow plowed.

    Misha…his, Travis, daughter is staying with his mother. She was left behind with nowhere to go, abandoned while he was overseas. Disgust doesn’t begin to describe my feelings.

    Nor mine. Damn, I’m this close to fantasizing about tracking down the slut and beating her to death with an entrenching tool. I mean, what kind of a deranged BITCH dumps an eleven-year-old girl???

    But of course she wouldn’t be worth it. She’ll get hers, what goes around comes around, and one day, G-d willing, she’ll be hit square in the face with a load of Karma so huge that she cannot possibly enjoy it.

    And G-d bless YOU, my friend, for doing all you can to keep his spirits up and remind him that he’s still got a lot to come home to.

  13. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

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    Part of being a rott, Sire. Thank you. Walking the talk, as best I can. None too good somethimes but…

  14. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    Caveman, I bet Travis would not agree with your modesty. It sounds to me like you are doing him a world of good being there for him. Do not underestimate how important contact with a friend back home can be to a deployed warrior.
    God Bless you for your kind heart man. Not only will Travis be in my prayers, but you as well.

  15. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    Heck, you know what I’m talking about. There are few things more likely to fuck with the mind of a grunt than that, leading to all manner of accidents and other stupid shit LEADING TO GOOD PEOPLE GETTING KILLED. All because some randy, rancid cunt can’t wait to get her furrow plowed.

    Know that story way to well Sire, a little to personal as well. Like I said, the ones who wait faithfully are truly amazing women who deserve every bit of respect as the men they wait for.

    As to the others…I’ll withhold comment right now. Not in the mood to go to my dark place. It’s not nice and I don’t like me much when I go there.

  16. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    As to the others…I’ll withhold comment right now. Not in the mood to go to my dark place. It’s not nice and I don’t like me much when I go there.

    No need to, brother. I went there for you (new post).

  17. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    No need to, brother. I went there for you (new post).

    Well you drug me right along Sire. I just unloaded. Probably the most angry I’ve ever commented. It needed to be said though, thanks for bringing the subject up. To few people ever think about that.

  18. George guy Comment by George guy

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    It is amazing what qualifies as news these days.

    I can pull better headlines out of my ass.

    Al Qaeda Threatens Venezuela–Chavez Baffled: “Hey, we’re on your side!”

    Muslims Harsher than Other Religious Groups on Blasphemers

    Plastic Sporks: They Don’t Work!

    Civilian Armament Effective in Thwarting Terrorism

  19. Unregistered Comment by tradewind

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    Dammit. I’m glad we didn’t let slip our MOST secret-est Plan, the one that Jack Bauer drew up for the brass…..
    Pave Paradise and Put Up a Parking Lot.
    (shhh, don’t let it slip)………

  20. Cheapshot911 Comment by Cheapshot911

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    I copied that “Dear John” line, deleted it, tried again,, couldn’t write, then, naturaly, Sire jerked it back into the keylight in proper fashionL

    I feel a rant coming on on that very subject. That and the subject of stateside sluts with crotch itches a country mile wide who can’t keep their whoring knees together for the duration of one lousy deployment.

    ‘Guess everyone’s hadda heart smashed somehow, somewhere.
    For me, it was years before I realized that the sooner I turned up and chucked a traitor, the sooner you can re-build on a sturdier foundation.

    She never deserved him. PERIOD.
    She’d better hope she doesn’t GET what she desertves.

  21. juandos Comment by juandos

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    US contingency plans for air strikes on Iran extend beyond nuclear sites and include most of the country’s military infrastructure, the BBC has learned

    Hmmm, does the BBC think that there might be a changing attitude towards terrorist towel heads in Euro-Weasel land?

    Can’t have that!

    James Lewis penning the, “Is Free Europe waking up?” over at American Thinker thinks so…

  22. NCLivingBrit Comment by NCLivingBrit

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    Ah, the Beeb. A goverment-funded Leftist organ of sedition and Dhimmitude it is, but their comedies can be pure gold.

    Guess you have to be one funny son of a bitch to be able to come up with the bullshit they spew……

  23. Unregistered Pingback by Inoperable Terran » Red alert!

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    […] BBC is horrified that CENTCOM has contingency plans for invading Iran. Posted by Ian S. […]

  24. Kristopher Comment by Kristopher

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    Ermmmm …. CENTCOM probably has plans for the invasion and conquest of Antarctica in some filing cabinet somewhere … that doesn’t mean we are going to actually do it tomorrow.

  25. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    Ermmmm …. CENTCOM probably has plans for the invasion and conquest of Antarctica in some filing cabinet somewhere … that doesn’t mean we are going to actually do it tomorrow.

    ‘Zactly.

    Contingency plans, as opposed to hastily scribbled notes in crayon when the shit has already hit the fan, are a Good Thing™. Otherwise you end up with the Krauts sipping Beaujolais in Paris for four years.

  26. BC, Imperial Torturer Comment by BC, Imperial Torturer

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    Crunchie sed:

    It’s not nice and I don’t like me much when I go there.

    That’s when Marines are at their best, brutha.

    :guns_tb:

    PS: Have the blood alcohol streams returned to normal for any of the LC’s who attended this past weekend’s festivities? I think mine’s down to about a .25 now.

    :drunk_tb:

  27. BC, Imperial Torturer Comment by BC, Imperial Torturer

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    Otherwise you end up with the Krauts sipping Beaujolais in Paris for four years.

    Isn’t that the German national pastime? Seems that they conquer the *spit* fWench *spit* :surrender_tb: more often than the *spit* fWench *spit* :surrender_tb: win the World Cup.

    :lol_wp:

  28. jaybear Comment by jaybear

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    US contingency plans for air strikes on Iran extend beyond nuclear sites and include most of the country’s military infrastructure, the BBC has learned.

    Well, at least Hillary is on board with uniting the country in a time of war

    Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton said Monday that South Carolina should remove the Confederate flag from its Statehouse grounds, in part because the nation should unite under one banner while at war.

    Gawd, I choked up my Toaster Strudel laughing at that one

  29. BC, Imperial Torturer Comment by BC, Imperial Torturer

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    jaybear, in the famous words of Larry The Cable Guy:

    “I don’t care who you are, that there’s funny!”
    :lol_wp:

  30. Lady Heather Comment by Lady Heather

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    Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton said Monday that South Carolina should remove the Confederate flag from its Statehouse grounds, in part because the nation should unite under one banner while at war.

    We’re still fighting the Civil War?

    BTW, John McCain came by here, just up the road from me, last Sunday.

    No, I didn’t care.

  31. jaybear Comment by jaybear

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    BC sez:

    “I don’t care who you are, that there’s funny!”

    Hey, glad you survived the weekend man…you guys had an impressive arsenal there. I was particularly struck with the Thompson with the drum magazine (Hey Mr. Capone, how many words a minute can you do with that Chicago Typewriter).

    If I thought it would make a difference, I would email this link to all of the revisionists who want to ban the “Confederate Flag”

    These idiots are so ignorant of the history they wish to re-write. The flag they get so up in arms about is NOT the Confederate national flag, it is the battle flag of the Confederacy. Designed because the National flag looked so much like Old Glory that units (in the Fog of War) would often rally to what they thought was the flags of THEIR side…only to realize that they were standing in the middle of the enemy. There is nothing racist about the flag that carries the St. Andrews Cross, if the PC revisionists want to ban a Confederate flag….then let them go after the National Flag…you know, the one that hasn’t flown in 150 years.

  32. Cheapshot911 Comment by Cheapshot911

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    US contingency plans for air strikes on Iran extend beyond nuclear sites and include most of the country’s military infrastructure, the BBC has learned

    I reckon bbc has not a clue that they, as an important part of the propaganda effort, are part of that infrastructure.

  33. Terrapod Comment by Terrapod

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    Ahh - so nice to see kindred spirits on this subject.

    I have been ruminating over why we have not kept up the traditions of our past such as the Monroe doctrine or TR’s “walk softly and carry a big stick”. One has to admit we are capable of walking so softly nowdays that no one knows we are there, and we certainly don’t lack for big sticks. What we lack is the cojones to see something for what it truly is and then act accordingly, “public outcry” be damned!

    Where you may ask, is this guy leading…. well, I have been asking myself for about a year now, since word of Iran’s direct meddling in Labanon and Iraq has become obvious, why we don’t simply return to these clear policies of the past. Tell Iranian leadership, publicly and to their face, the any time a shaped charge metal penetrator goes off in Iraq, one of thir naval vessels will be sunk. When any of our men or assets are hit by 50 cal sniper bullets one or more of their aircraft will be destroyed, any time a car bomb goes off anywhere in Iraq, one of their Quds bases, pereferably full of sleeping soldiers will be levelled and so on. Not a declaration of war, just back to “you mess with me, I mess with you worse” action. Eventually they will get the message, especially if we escalate the math a bit, say 2 for one, then 3 for one and so on.

    Is this irrational? I think not. What is irrational is letting the iranian leadership continue doing what they are doing with NO REPRISALS. These have to be instant reprisals by the U.S. and our allies. I mean, within 10 minutes of one of their actions in Iraq or Lebanon or wherever, something goes blooie inside their country, sooner if possible. Even a mule takes note when you hit it hard enough with a 2X4 on the side of the head.

    QED

  34. LC Guido Cabrone Comment by LC Guido Cabrone

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    Even a mule takes note when you hit it hard enough with a 2X4 on the side of the head.

    Your average mule has a higher “Wisdom” score than the average Splodeydope fer Allah, however…

  35. LC Guido Cabrone Comment by LC Guido Cabrone

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Contingency plans, as opposed to hastily scribbled notes in crayon when the shit has already hit the fan, are a Good Thing™. Otherwise you end up with the Krauts sipping Beaujolais in Paris for four years.

    Hell, if one were to dig deep enough in the Pentagon archives, I have no doubt that there is in existence a set of plans to take out Canada, fer pity’s sake!

    (If you go even deeper, you could probably find the ones for destroying the infrastructure of this country. No, I have no doubt what-so-ever that they do exist, were probably done up during the Cold War, and stashed away in a folder marked “The Russians Are Coming!” Okay, okay, more like, “Contingincies for Soviet Invasion of the Continental United States: ‘Scorched Earth’ Policies”…)