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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Another Brother!
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We’re not attempting to run off with the Imperial Firearms Advisor’s idea here, just think of it as expanding the Mission a bit.

The Idea being, of course, to “Turn America back into a Nation of Riflemen, one citizen at a time”. Because, as we all know, the best way to guarantee that our Second Amendment rights will survive is to create more gun owners. Not to mention the societal benefits of having an armed population. As Robert Heinlein put it so perfectly: “An armed society is a polite society.”

Over the years, none have done more to spread the Gospel of Gun Ownership than the Imperial Firearms Advisor. I don’t think anybody, including himself, can count how many new gun owners his excellent site, advice and support has created over the years, but I can state for the record that his influence played no small part in expediting His Imperial Majesty’s journey to the status of full-fledged rifleman and responsible, gun owning American.

Think about it: We have about 80 million gun owners already. Allowing for the portion of the total population that are ineligible for gun ownership (very young children, felons and the infirm, to name a few), that means that if each and every one of us brings just two more people into the fold, then anybody who CAN own a gun in this country WILL own a gun. Of course, that’s not to say that once you’ve recruited two citizens, you have to stop. It’s more an indicator of just how easy it is to do your bit, and Kim has certainly done more than most.

A regular feature of his site, as you know, is sharing with the public whenever the news arrives in his Inbox that yet another citizen has made the step and become a gun owner, something that is always met with much joy and merriment (and the occasional happy nekkid dance in the backyard, but we’re not sure how thrilled his neighbors are about that. At any rate, that’s their problem), as indeed it should be.

So His Majesty was thrilled pink when the following email from LC Uchuck the Tuchuck hit his mailbox this morning:

One of my colleagues at work has been going to the range with me for the past several months. With his tax rebate on the way and the benediction of his good lady wife, we set off yesterday afternoon for the local pistol parlor to peruse the pieces. Now, the boy is a Yankee, but he’s alright–knew enough to bring me along to translate for him and keep the local good-ole-boys from giving him the skunk-eye, the cold shoulder, and the bum?’s rush.

Always a good idea. If you’re thinking about getting a gun, get a hold of one of your gun owning friends. And if you’re one of those gun owning friends getting a call from somebody wanting to join the fraternity, get your arse out of the chair and go. Clear out your calendar if you must, just go do it. It’s your duty.

We lucked into having a very nice gun shop just a few miles up the road and in short order we were drooling at the counter. My compadre had his heart set on a Ruger Mark III .22 caliber, having fired my twenty-odd-year-old Mark II a number of times. He looked over the offerings available, dickered a dicker or two, checked a catalogue to get the specs on what they didn’t have under the glass and ultimately drove home his deal on a brand new Ruger Mark III with a 6″ Bull Barrel and adjustable sights. Within 20 minutes of the purchase, we were on the range and he put the first 200 rounds through the pipe before sundown. It was a Ruger .22, so of course not a single miss-feed.

Yes, I realize it isn’t a Rhino-dropper or a one-shot-man-stopper (unlike my regular carry, Mjolnir, a .45 ACP Colt—you just can’t top the classics), and that’s not what he got it for.

It’s also not important. When you take a friend out to buy his first gun, you’re introducing him to a new hobby as well as a new responsibility. A lot of people seem to forget, however, that shooting is supposed to be fun as well as useful, with an enormous emphasis on “fun.” Because shooting IS fun. It’s not just a dreary duty that you have to perform, it’s also something that you should enjoy. Because, let’s face it, if it starts to feel like jury duty or filling in your tax returns, you won’t be sticking with it for very long. I know I wouldn’t.

There are too many people out there insisting that if you’re going to own a gun, it has to be the biggest, baddest gun in the Valley. Bullshit. If that’s what you want, then yes, but your FIRST priority should be “do I enjoy shooting this gun?” If you don’t, then you won’t be going to the range with it enough, and that’s a Bad Thing™. Not only is it unlikely that you’ll ever use it if you, Heaven forbid, should ever have to, but you’ll end up being a lousy shot with it if you do.

Shooting is fun. If you lose sight of that, then you’re not doing it right.

If you want a .22 “plinker”, then get one. They’re LOADS of fun, ridiculously cheap in ammo and, let me tell you, once you’re hooked, it’s only a matter of time… It doesn’t matter what caliber your first gun is, don’t listen to the twits insisting that you’re not really armed unless you’re waving around a Desert Eagle at the range. The best gun in the world is the one you happen to be holding when you need it, not the amazing death beast that all of your friends insist that you ought to own. And yes, a .22 between the eyes is quite likely to get the attention of a goblin. It’s a damn sight more likely to impress than a .50 round missing him by a mile because you never bothered to go get familiar with it.

He’s not going to be a regular concealed carry (not that he’s opposed to the idea)–he just wanted something with which to put lead on target.

I feel like a pusher handing out free samples to school kids when I say this, but it’s true: Once you taken the first step, the rest will follow. (Evil, cackling laughter). At any rate, LC Uchuck nails it with this:

The important bit here is that it is a gun.

‘Nuff said.

We can welcome another good citizen to our ranks: an educated, rational, thoughtful gun owner. And the really neat thing about the entire afternoon (other than the huge grin on his face) was the talk on the way back from the range, as he looked into the future of going shooting with his boy (currently about two-and-a-half years old), teaching him how to use a weapon safely, when to use a weapon, and setting up another generation in a long American tradition.

You done good, LC Uchuck and, in the proud tradition of the Imperial Firearms Advisor, I’ll now go outside and do the happy nekkid dance to celebrate the addition of another brother to the community of proud, responsible gun owners. Welcome aboard, my friend!

Yay!

33 Responses to “Another Brother!”
  1. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    You done good, LC Uchuck and, in the proud tradition of the Imperial Firearms Advisor, I’ll now go outside and do the happy nekkid dance to celebrate the addition of another brother to the community of proud, responsible gun owners.

    Amen to that Uchuck, good show buddy !!!

    Now as to the Emperor dancing, that is a very good thing of course, but….the nekkid part…ummm….I’ll take your word for it, photographic evidence isn’t necessary, at all.

    I’m sure the Empress would appreciate that (in private), but the world just isn’t ready for Nigel to be displayed in public.

    :flush_tb:

    I think my assignment to 90 degrees, North Latitude just got a lot longer.

    FIRST, but suicidally so.

  2. Cheapshot911 Comment by Cheapshot911

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    Proud Welcome to the newest member of the United State’s Citizen’s Militia.

    May your new piece always be fired in glee, never in fear.

    But, in either case,, don’t miss.

  3. Empress Sofia Comment by Empress Sofia

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    *AHEM* I can attest to the fact that the above picture is NOT Nigel. The “dragon” in that pic is a baby compared to the REAL Nigel! JB behave yourself! *scolds JB strongly* BWAHAHAHahahaha!

  4. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    *bowing and scraping dejectedly*

    Sorry Ma’am. I didn’t check the original date/time stamp. That indeed is pre-pubescent Nigel.

    JB behave yourself!

    I couldn’t control myself…sorreeee

    I’ll report to the Imperial Clinic™ ASAP for another round of electro-shock therapy.

    The Boss did warn me that exposure to BC >24 hrs was usually fatal, guess I’m lucky, eh?

    *packing another layer of warm clothing*

  5. Empress Sofia Comment by Empress Sofia

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    *Touche* Add another 10 layers of clothing JB!

  6. LC HOGHEAD Comment by LC HOGHEAD

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    I remember my dad,who served in the Marines in WW2 ,tell this story. His squad had captured several Japanese soldiers and were transporting them for interogation. During the trip, one of the Japanese soldiers ,who spoke English, conversed with his American captors. Among other things, he told of a Japanese plan early in the war (when they were winning), to invade the mainland USA (california)which was later scrubbed. He said that although the Imperial Army felt confident it could beat the US Army on US soil, they decided that AMERICAN CITIZENS HAD FAR TOO MANY GUNS TO EVER BE CONTROLLED BY AN OCCUPYING ARMY!

  7. Unregistered Comment by dodger_zulu

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    Oh, Great and Divine Emperor…

    …My first post here…please excuse my bumbling to your Divine Goodness…

    This thread of helping a bud out in the confusing purchase of a firearm is indeed the best of advice I have EVER seen on the ‘net. My Lord, this should come up on GOOGLE everytime someone types in “buying a first gun”.

    I Thankith Thee… too smart for words and too right for description…

    Thank You

    /me bows

  8. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    Welcome there Dodger-Zulu !!!

    Always good to see a new victim member of the Empire on the comments threads.

    You just signed-up with a thoroughly despicable, uncouth, brazen and GREAT bunch here.

    to your Divine Goodness…

    buuuuwaaaahaaaaaa….His Vileness has been called many, many names, but I can’t recall divine and good in the same sentence.

    We do expect to see you around regular-like, now that you’ve opened yer yap.

    :clap_tb:

  9. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    We do expect to see you around regular-like, now that you’ve opened yer yap.

    Indeed! Welcome aboard and, really, you’re too kind, good sir dodger-zulu.

    And “good?”…

    No, I can’t recall having been called that either.

  10. DUTCH Comment by DUTCH

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    Your comments earlier plus the strong suggestions of a good friend has resulted in my ordering a converted Russian Saiga-12, which is a semi-auto 12 gauge shotgun built on the Kalashnikov AK action. It has a 10 round magazine. This for close quarters HD.

    Also on the way is a Rock River Arms .223/5.56mm NATO M4/AR-15 carbine with 30 round mags for distance work.

    Gotta get ‘em before the recently introduced re-up of the AWB (Ban H.R. 1022) gets too much favorable attention. If it goes through, you won’t be able to buy a pea shooter without a permit to carry.

  11. LC Guido Cabrone Comment by LC Guido Cabrone

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    And “good?”…

    No, I can’t recall having been called that either.

    Well, not in that sense, at least… The “Pinnacle of Eeeeevvvvillllll”, “TheEpitomeOfTheEvilRRRightWWWingDDDeathBBBeast”, “Terminally Psychotic”, or “A Damned Good Author”…

    Oh, there it is… Yer right, that was “A Damned GREAT Author”!

    My Bad.

  12. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

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    Hey Dodger, welcome! And what a lovely post, left me beamin’ like a searchlight. Yes, I got two hooked so far, Jackboot, my other half loves her .45, especially after her first dead center bull at ten yards. My young collich edukkated boss loves his new Glock .40. Spoke with him a lot about guns. He just wanted to target shoot, but if self-defense is otherwise not possible. I keep working on others, my life membership in the NRA along with the membership I bought for my wife, along with any support I can tender in the form of letters and such. Damn, this post made me feel good. Besides, the apple of my eye in my Marlin rifle, a beautiful machine. Not that I don’t like my .45…I do. We are buddies, mr Gun and I. :guns_tb:

  13. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    To Quote BisW, overheard on the debaucheacast, during the TampaFestO’DoomVer2007™…

    “I want to see the Emperor’s Best Seller, How to Piss Off or Offend Everyone, signed by Shaitan himself”.

    :devil_tb:

  14. LC Mrs. M Comment by LC Mrs. M

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    I love the smell of Cordite in the morning.
    We bought our guns for defense..but we’re enjoying them just as much just taking them to the range and blowing holes in the targets. Helps with stress immensely. Well except for that damn shotgun. OW!!

    but the world just isn’t ready for Nigel to be displayed in public.

    Any more links like that JB and I’m going to have to sell those Cubans to pay for my Eye Transplant. You’ve become BC’s Evil Twin!! :wallbash_tb:

    My first post here…

    Welcome dodger_zulu! Just step over the Troll bodies. They get picked up on Thursdays, but the Sanitation Technicians are on strike this week. Something about the work load getting too much for them or something.

    One word of advice. If you value your Opthalmic Orbs, you will take care to NOT click on ANY link that BC offers up. And it looks like we need to add Jackboot to that list now.

    :nono_tb:

  15. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    WooHooo !!!!!

    And it looks like we need to add Jackboot to that list now.

    :undecided_tb:

    I’m in good company indeed now, stratospherically depraved…LOL

    but the Sanitation Technicians are on strike this week

    And they walked from the bargaining table too, guess who just got nominated as Imperial Trash Technician™?

    Sounds sortof nice: LC Mrs. M ITT™….I like it…..I dub you so…..

    buwwwaaahaaaaaaa

  16. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    Sounds sortof nice: LC Mrs. M ITT™….I like it…..I dub you so…

    Better watch out JB. You guys are going to have to start wiping your bloody muddy boots on the porch now instead of just tromping it in. Do you have any idea how hard it is to clean up all the Troll carcasses without having to hose them off first? Not only that…but I’ve half a mind to switch all the trash bags around here from those bland black ones to some more chic rose or mint green…..hmmmmm…..*runs off to find her Better Castles and Botanic Gardens magazines….

  17. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    You guys are going to have to start wiping your bloody muddy boots on the porch now instead of just tromping it in.

    What??? But madam, that’s part of the ambience of this place! Sure it gets a bit rank around the Palace at times, especially around summer, but can’t we compromise here?

    I mean, if we promise to do our best to clean out any actual body parts at least once a week? And what about all the memories associated with the stains around here. Like that spot on the wall in the lobby from when one of the trolls got past the guard dogs and I decorated the wall in that ever-so-tasteful color, “Hint of Brain…”

    Don’t destroy the very soul around here, I beg you!

    Not only that…but I’ve half a mind to switch all the trash bags around here from those bland black ones to some more chic rose or mint green…

    ARRGHHH! No, nonononononoNO! We’re not tarting up this place a la Martha Stewart, over my dead body. Next, we’ll be tripping over throw rugs and the torture racks will be buried under mounds of superfluous pillows. And no scented candles either.

  18. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    Welcome to the Rott dodger-zulu! I will reiterate the advice of my fellow LC’s, do NOT open any link from BC unless you are at least 18 (21 in some areas), have not eaten in 24 hours, and have a very resilient gag reflex. And it always helps top have a bottle of “BC Brain Bleach” TM handy.

    I don’t know how many people I may or may have not brought to the gun owners club, being a firearms instructor they usually come to my class already decided, but I know I teach em the best I can to make sure they STAY gun owning citizens, responsible, safe and proficient ones at that.

  19. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    ARRGHHH! No, nonononononoNO! We’re not tarting up this place a la Martha Stewart, over my dead body.

    Geeeeez! Get a promotion and try to make some improvements around here and what happens? Hit a brick wall on my first day. Bummer! :wallbash_tb:

    I mean, if we promise to do our best to clean out any actual body parts at least once a week?

    *sigh*….Twice a week. Mondays and Fridays. And I’ll agree to leave everything else as is. Even that big brown stain where Um Yeah met his final Cluebat. It kind of looks like a Welcome Mat anyway…….

    OH…it IS Um Yeah!…I thought you guys scraped him up ages ago!

    *grumbling while retrieving the shovel out of the Imperial Broom Closet*

    And no scented candles either.

    *nonchalantly slides two full cases of Yankee Candles (Macintosh Apple) under the table on her way to the broom closet*

    Absolutely Sire. :innocent1_tb:

  20. Unregistered Comment by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant

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    Always a good idea. If you’re thinking about getting a gun, get a hold of one of your gun owning friends. And if you’re one of those gun owning friends getting a call from somebody wanting to join the fraternity, get your arse out of the chair and go. Clear out your calendar if you must, just go do it. It’s your duty.

    I tried.  You were busy.

    No matter - I got what I’d gone there to get, and I’m still pleased with the purchases I made.

  21. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    ummm ohhh Crunchie !!!!!

    Welcome to the Rott dodger-zulu! I will reiterate the advice of my fellow LC’s, do NOT open any link from BC unless you are at least 18 (21 in some areas), have not eaten in 24 hours, and have a very resilient gag reflex. And it always helps top have a bottle of “BC Brain Bleach” TM handy.

    You forgot to add, have a Priest, Rabbi, Pastor, or Spiritual Advisor of your choice at hand, to the checklist. If only for absolution of the resulting comments post-click.

    Hit the rack, Marine, you’re tired and silly, as well as ugly….not that sleep (or plastic surgery) could correct that genetic defect.

  22. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    JB

    Hit the rack, Marine, you’re tired and silly, as well as ugly….not that sleep (or plastic surgery) could correct that genetic defect.

    At least I’m a young looking ugly! :tongue3_tb:

  23. MasterGuns Comment by MasterGuns

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    Thank all the war gods I’m out here in the provinces……I let my trolls go to the crab pots. I don’t envy you your task Mrs T.

    On another note….Welcome aboard dodger. You will periodically find us almost pleasant.

    NEVER CLICK ON BC’s LINKS!!!

    Semper Fi

  24. MasterGuns Comment by MasterGuns

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    “Mrs T.”

    A deliberate mis-naming of you…….from Mrs M to Mrs T(for Troll remover). I strongly suggest incense in addition to scented candles.

    Semper Fi

  25. juandos Comment by juandos

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    NEVER CLICK ON BC’s LINKS!!!

    :lol_wp:

    Wiser words were never said!

  26. Lady Heather Comment by Lady Heather

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    NEVER CLICK ON BC’s LINKS!!!

    Or (Mr) Dick’s.

  27. Unregistered Comment by dodger_zulu

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    Thank you all for the Welcomes..been lurking in the shadows for awhile until (ok- been throughly corrected here) His Imperial Rottiness posted this Most Grateful Undulgence of Wisdom- it hit home with me as 10 years ago, I bought a .357 for the lowly reason of defending my household. Turned out the gun was more than I could handle… thought about selling or trading it for something more manageable.

    “Hey, these things can take a .38: that ain’t so bad”

    With that in mind, I ranged it out for a couple of days and discovered the True Art of Shooting for Enjoyment. My Second Admendment Right now felt So Right in my hands that I was able to graduate BACK to .357 mode and feel confident about it- the most important ingredient in true gun control.

    I wish I’D had that Buddy to help me out ten years ago… would’ve gone a long way for a short distance…

    Dodger

  28. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Again, a hearty welcome dodger zulu! Look forward to having you around, especially for the first Troll Massacre Clue Batting. They are always a ton of fun!

  29. Michael Comment by Michael

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    *sigh* if .30-06 was cheap and plentafiul as .22, but I can dream.

  30. akornzombie Comment by akornzombie

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    *sigh* if .30-06 was cheap and plentafiul as .22, but I can dream.

    Heh. It could be worse. You could be shooting .303 British.

  31. NCLivingBrit Comment by NCLivingBrit

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Well, talking of the British, a lot of the guests where I work are Brits (as, obviously am I). Just hooked up a quartet of long-termers with little to do with directions and info on the nearest rental range (12 minutes away!).

    You have not seen grins this big. Brits love to shoot guns, it’s that forbidden fruit angle…..

    Doing my best to foster free thinking folks back in the Homeland….

  32. MasterGuns Comment by MasterGuns

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    “You could be shooting .303 British.”

    Ain’t that the truth. That’s why I “roll my own”.

    Semper Fi

  33. akornzombie Comment by akornzombie

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I’m seriously looking into that, MasterGuns, having just dropped 30+ bucks for about ninety rounds of Berdan primed surplus ammo.

    And of course there is the fun of waiting for the next gunshow to roll through for the opportunity to buy more ammo too.