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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Great Moments in MSM Illiteracy
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Just out of the corner of our eye while working, we noticed FOX News putting up a blurb for an upcoming story about students ripping off material from the Internets™ rather than doing their own work. Sort of like the way that all the news agencies out there get their stories from Iraq. All they need is the hyperlink to CENTCOM’s press release section, a vivid imagination coupled with a metric ton of creative license, and all of a sudden they’re “serious reporters.” But we digress…

The thing is, the headline for the spot, as proudly advertised at the bottom of our TV screen, was, and we swear we’re not making this up:

PLAGERISM?

Er, excuse us, but we’d strongly suggest that you tell your ticker monkeys to plagiarize a copy of Merriam-Webster’s at their earliest opportunity.

OR you can hire us. At least we can spell.

21 Responses to “Great Moments in MSM Illiteracy”
  1. Sir Christopher Comment by Sir Christopher

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    that’s redickulus

  2. Unregistered Comment by TGregg

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    Ahbeously, sum membirs uf da pres speant two litel tyme en skuul.

  3. Unregistered Comment by TGregg

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    From some time ago:

    The reason people say, “Welcome to America, now speak English,” is because they are to dense to learn any other languages. Pity them and their children. — From a t-shirt vending page at http://www.cafepress.com

    They had hats, t-shirts, buttons, coffee cups and bumper stickers embossed with this bit of wisdom for sale.

  4. Unregistered Comment by Perpetual Student

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Okay! I confess! It was I who misspelled “homecoming” as “homecomming” during an inter-segment title sequence of the “video yearbook” fifteen years ago! I can carry the burden of shame no further!

    Aw, fuck it. I hated high school.

    Anyway, it’s not as though they mis-spelled Niger Innis’s name again.

  5. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    Anyway, it’s not as though they mis-spelled Niger Innis’s name again.

    Hey, I’m cool with the fact that the new generations of graduates are slightly less literate than the average 2nd grader when I was their age.

    For one thing, it means that there’ll always be a market for old coots like myself, for the very simple reason that we actually speak and write English and, for another, I know that my kids will run circles around their contemporaries, for that very same reason.

    And they won’t even have to put in an actual effort.

    In the land of the publik skooled dolts, the guy who can spell his own name is king.

  6. Ten-Ten Comment by Ten-Ten

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    Thear wuz a tim in this grate kuntry, that peepel took pried in thear grammur an spealling. Nohw, eny won with a cumpeter kan rite reel purdy lihk me. This is ahl thancks to Speal Chec. Ah gess the idjits at Fox gut lazee.

  7. Unregistered Comment by DukeFenton

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    Guess they’ll be stuk en Irak soon. :laugh_tb:

  8. Nixcell Comment by Nixcell

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    the new generations of graduates are slightly less literate than the average 2nd grader when I was their age.

    Not if they make it out of my class. If they can make it past me…IF.

  9. Unregistered Comment by Perpetual Student

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Hey, I’m cool with the fact that the new generations of graduates are slightly less literate than the average 2nd grader when I was their age.

    As an old fart who is ever closer to finally attaining his B.S. in computer science, I must concur. As a requirement of my technical writing class taken shortly upon my return, we would routinely perform peer reviews of works in progress. Those works were consistently horrid.

    In the land of the publik skooled dolts, the guy who can spell his own name is king.

    Perhaps I’ll have a chance at landing a job post-graduation despite a lack of intimate .NET experience. heh heh

    P.S.: For those who didn’t get my Niger Innis reference, I present to you the MSNBC titling faux pas. For some reason, I had mistakenly attributed it to Fox News.

  10. juandos Comment by juandos

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    Spelling correctly is part and parcel of getting one’s facts correct and we know how the MSM seems to have an allergic reaction to facts…

  11. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    Not if they make it out of my class. If they can make it past me…IF.

    HEY! Quit making the competition for my kids harder by doing such a good job! Dammit! :wink_ee:

  12. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    As an old fart who is ever closer to finally attaining his B.S. in computer science, I must concur.

    Tell me about it. Hardly a week goes by without me reading something supposedly written by people with at least a college degree, wondering if they’d talked their 6-year-olds into writing it for them. And I’m just sitting there thinking ‘what the FUCK?’ And I’m a damn FURRINER for crying out loud! It’s not even my first language!

    No, I don’t mean honest typos, we all make those (I make ‘em all the time), nor am I disparaging anybody with dyslexia or other conditions clearly outside of their control, I’m talking about college graduates that obviously haven’t the first fucking clue about the language that they pretend is their native one.

    Jesus WEPT.

    When we finally fix the Constitution so I can be elected President for life, one of the first things I’ll do is to hit 99% of “learning” institutions with the RICO Act, demanding every single fucking cent they’ve ever received back. If there is an example of a worse, organized scam in the history of this nation than them charging for the fucked up product they deliver, I haven’t heard of it.

  13. Unregistered Comment by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant

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    Do I really  have to re-tell the story about how I, with nothing more than a “hah skrewl edumacation” (a little Rush lingo, there) can out-spell my supposedly degreed and  teaching-certified 2nd ex (aka Stephanie Dawn Stewart Crager, the Doublewide Bitch Supreme)?

  14. LC MoMinuteMan Comment by LC MoMinuteMan

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    Has anybody seen Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?

    From what I’ve seen, these kids are either from excellent Private Schools, or the fix is in, because some of the questions they ask could not be answered by pubelick skool kids.

    And the contestants are largely pathetic examples of the rot of stupidity that has this country circling the drain… :flush_tb:

  15. Unregistered Comment by TGregg

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Has anybody seen Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?

    Yeah, I saw part of one show. The contestant gave up when faced with the overwhelming question of “How many square inches are in one half of a 12 inch square?”

    He was going to guess 44 or 42 or some other crazy answer.

    On another show, they asked a funny question. How many instances of the letter I in illiterate?

  16. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    When we finally fix the Constitution so I can be elected President for life, one of the first things I’ll do is to hit 99% of “learning” institutions with the RICO Act, demanding every single fucking cent they’ve ever received back. If there is an example of a worse, organized scam in the history of this nation than them charging for the fucked up product they deliver, I haven’t heard of it.

    errr, Social Security, perhaps? All I can think of.

  17. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    Another strong contender, LC Wil.

    It’ll be next.

  18. Unregistered Comment by Uchuck the Tuchuck

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Last Fall National Geographic advertised some adventure documentary they had coming up, in which the announcer breathlessly asked if I had what it took to “forge a raging river.” Not only did he say it, they had a graphic at the bottom of the screen that spelled it that way.

    Well now, come to think of it Skippy, I don’t have what it takes to forge a raging river. My anvil keeps getting rusty and the fire went out every time I tried to heat the river up.

  19. Unregistered Comment by Perpetual Student

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    “Health and Human Services” is an even bigger waste of money than Social Security.

  20. NCLivingBrit Comment by NCLivingBrit

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    As to the ‘plajerizm’ thing, you should see some of the papers my wife gets (10th Grade English teacher).

    They don’t even TRY anymore. They copy and paste the wrong subject, print the paper with the web address appended to the bottom, or my favourite: they leave an ad for amazon.com in the body of the text!

    We just laugh our asses off sometimes. But they don’t even get disciplinary action for this, just a 0 for that item of coursework. If you got caught cheating like that in my school, you got the cane.

  21. Brian the sailor Comment by Brian the sailor

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    Misha, you do spell very well for a furner. When I see immigrants who speak and spell better than college grads here, it makes me despair for the future. I have a friend who’s the one German who spoke almost no English when she arrived here. She taught herself English in a matter of months because she APPLIED herself.

    Oh, and she’s gorgeous. Yeah, it has nothing to do with the subject, but DAMN!