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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » “First, We Kill All The Lawyers”
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…a series with an unknown series of installments covering everything from how interrogating terrorists became illegal, over how Mullah Omar owes his life to a bunch of brass-covered peacock desk jockeys with the combined combat experience of Shirley Temple to this:

Take the question of targeting bomb makers: There may be an unlimited supply of explosives in Iraq, but there is not an unlimited supply of people who know how to wire the detonators. In 2004, CIA operatives in Iraq believed that they had identified the signatures of 11 bomb makers. They proposed a diabolical — but potentially effective — sabotage program that would have flooded Iraq with booby-trapped detonators designed to explode in the bomb makers’ hands.

Brilliant! Which explains exactly why a gaggle of fuckheaded metrosexual staplers with a license to file in Langley just had to shut it down:

But the CIA general counsel’s office said no. The lawyers claimed that the agency lacked authority for such an operation, one source recalled.

One can only wonder how many of our young men and women have died because of those REMF suits.

25 Responses to ““First, We Kill All The Lawyers””
  1. LC FIAR Comment by LC FIAR

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    Well, they do want to see the body count of our side rocket as high as possible. All those Grim Milestones™ are just part of the agenda.

    Two prongs, turn Americans against the war effort. “How many must die?” Part two, help the enemy. That’s a whole goal in and of itself.

    First!

  2. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    One can only wonder how many of our young men and women have died because of those REMF suits.

    I dunno, but I wonder if it would be possible to file suit against them for wrongful death? (I know, I know, fantasy land again…)

  3. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

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    Can we kill them with kindness instead?

  4. sig94 Comment by sig94

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    Sure, let them beat their swords into plowshares while we beat their balls into pita bread.

  5. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    What I want to know…since when did the CIA give a rat’s ass about what anyone said? They’ve been used to being a law unto themselves for decades. Guess Hitlary not only locked up Bill’s balls in her jewelry case but the CIA’s as well. But then I guess they never have been in a hurry to do anything that would actually be beneficial to the Military or the Country.

  6. SoCalOilMan, LC Comment by SoCalOilMan, LC

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Lawyers fear the “Exploding Pen”. A device that would automatically detonate if it detected the writing of “the party of the second part”, or other such stupid lawyer jargon.

    Don’t ever stereotype the practices of the target (the bomber) you are going for, that would be racist and against some stupid ass law that looks for the reason that some asshat made the the bomb, rather than justice for the innocents killed by it.

  7. TJ's Anti-Contrarian Blog Comment by TJ's Anti-Contrarian Blog

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Now THAT truly pisses me the fuck off.

    These ragheaded fucktards violate every one of the precepts of the Geneva Conventions of War, but we can’t jimmy some detonators that will be used by the same ragheaded Mooselimbs practicing the religion of Piss.

  8. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    LACKED AUTHORITY FOR SUCH AN OPERATION!

    Yumpiny Yimminy man thats exactly the type of fucking operation the CIA is SUPPOSED TO FUCKING DO!

    Where does the CIA hire it’s “Counsel”, directly from CAIR, or just the ones too stooopid to make it onto the short bus.

    Do you know what they call a person who graduates first in his law class? A lawyer

    Do you know what they call a person who graduates dead last in his law class? A lawyer.

    P.S. BiW, you know you’re exempt from all the merry lawyer bashing about to ensue. You’re one of the 1% still giving you’re profession a good name.

  9. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    This isn’t lawyer bashing (but the CIA has done covert things for decades! Including trying to assasinate Castro).

    But what I was going to say is that you guys finally got me motivated to look up CAIR in Wikopedia. I thought this would be good news:

    “On June 12th, 2007, it will be reported that the membership has dropped 90% since 9/11, 2001″

  10. Deathknyte Comment by Deathknyte

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    Do it anyway!

    Sure, let them beat their swords into plowshares while we beat their balls into pita bread.

    ROFLMAO!

  11. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    “On June 12th, 2007, it will be reported that the membership has dropped 90% since 9/11, 2001″

    Good news indeed PC, thanks for the warm and fuzzies.

  12. Princess Natasha Comment by Princess Natasha

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    So, there was this great plan to make the dumbass Hajifucks send themselves off to collect their 72 raisins, and some cock-smoking pansy-asses decided against it? WHAT THE FUCK?!!

  13. Unregistered Comment by thefrollickingmole

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    Do you blokes have a freedom of information act to get the reasoning behind that decision? Or would it be “classified to protect the guilty”?

    Close the CIA, what does it actually do apart from give the moonbats nightmares??

  14. Unregistered Comment by mindy1

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    Could anyone with the right background sya why this is wrong? Collateral damage fear, geneva conventions? Why??

  15. LC&IB Vulcanrider Comment by LC&IB Vulcanrider

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Asking a lawyer(spit, BiW excluded)in the CIA to approve an op is liking taking Safety and JAG to the war zone…it defeats the purpose.

    Hey, BiW, please tell me you didn’t attend school with any of those asswipes on the CIA payroll!

    You have a member of the Taliban, a leader of Al-Qaeda, and a representative of the Paleoswinian government in a room with an attorney. You also have a high caliber revolver, but only 2 bullets. What do you do?

    Shoot the lawyer twice so they can’t get off on a technicality.

  16. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

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    thefrollickingmole

    what does it actually do apart from give the moonbats nightmares??

    Yer after sayin’ that like it’s a bad thin’, mon.

  17. LC Old Dog Comment by LC Old Dog

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    Crunchie is right! If not for an operation like this, what the hell is the CIA for?

  18. AyUaxe Comment by AyUaxe

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    Uuggghhh! This crap just digusts me. As a lawyer, my job is to make my clients’ ideas work to the fullest extent of the law. As a human being, it’s my job to be sure when I do that I don’t transgress God’s laws and to advise my clients accordingly on that, too. It is never my job to hobble my client and prevent them from doing what they are supposed to do. How is it that gummint lawyers don’t seem to get this most basic, driving concept of our profession? Especially, how is it that attorneys in the CIA are removing viable, effective tactics from a battlefield? Try as I might, I can’t find any authority for that.

  19. AyUaxe Comment by AyUaxe

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    Uuggghhh! This crap just digusts me. As a lawyer, my job is to make my clients’ ideas work to the fullest extent of the law. As a human being, it’s my job to be sure when I do that I don’t transgress God’s laws and to advise my clients accordingly on that, too. It is never my job to hobble my client and prevent them from doing what they are supposed to do. How is it that gummint lawyers don’t seem to get this most basic, driving concept of our profession? Especially, how is it that attorneys in the CIA are removing viable, effective tactics from a battlefield? Try as I might, I can’t find any authority for that. One more thing–sometimes my clients don’t listen to me. They act on their own assessments and take some risks. Sometimes that works out fine, sometimes not and I try to help them clean up their mess; but going forward on their own is always an option. Coulda been for the CIA/Army Intel, too.

  20. Kristopher Comment by Kristopher

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    Too many Clintonistas in the CIA.

    That organization desperately needs a good purge.

  21. Unregistered Comment by Mark6591

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    Given the various oversight laws passed by our idiot legislators after Viet Nam, the shysters may be technically correct. Such action might require a Presidential Finding and reporting to several legislative committees, with subsequent front page exposure in the NY Slimes.

    Targeting the bomb makers is worth doing. If GWB cannot pull his head out, the British SAS is much less squeamish about such matters and their security better.

  22. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    Too many Clintonistas in the CIA.

    That organization desperately needs a good purge.

    Don’t forget to add Foggy Bottom to the list of “Things to Do, Soon”.

  23. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    That organization desperately needs a good purge.

    More like a lead enema or a sulphuric acid emetic.

    I’ll be happy to supply both.

  24. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    Can we kill them with kindness instead?

    I’d rather kill them with flensing knives, if it’s all the same.

  25. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

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    I’d rather kill them with flensing knives, if it’s all the same.

    Woodchippers, anyone?