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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Fucking Telemarketers
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This utterly annoying 800 number has been harassing me for a week or so by now, calling multiple times a day and never once leaving a message when I, as I am wont when unknown numbers call me, ignore it. If it’s somebody I want to talk to but don’t recognize the number of, I can always pick up during the message.

Finally I couldn’t stand it anymore and picked up the phone.

I don’t expect the stupid, rude, obnoxious sow on the other end to be calling this number ever again even if her life depends on it, nor do I expect her to go to sleep for the next three months without first checking her deadbolt at least a dozen times first.

First executive order to leave my desk when I become President will be specifying the death penalty without trial or appeal for telemarketing, and I’ll insist on attending every execution in person so that I may get the full pleasure from listening to them screaming in pain and unholy terror as they’re systematically dismembered with a rusty folding knife.

And I’ll enjoy every. last. fucking. SECOND of it.

Here’s a hint for cold callers: If I don’t answer, it’s because I don’t want to talk to you. If, after numerous attempts on your part, disregarding utterly Rule Number One, I DO answer it, make sure your earthly business is in order and that you’ve bid your loved ones adieu.

Die, assholes, DIE.

84 Responses to “Fucking Telemarketers”
  1. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Just like the sorry bastards that don’t “No, I’m not interested” for an answer.

  2. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    Somewhere in the wide, wide universe, there must be something more annoying than Telemarketers.

    But, I completely fail to have a clue what it may be.

    I once popped a .38 blank in the ear of one. Try that.

  3. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Hey, a foist!

    (Of course, my favorite was when I got a call from Sears wanting to sell me vinyl siding and windows. I HAVE vinyl siding and windows. Installed by Sears. I informed the lady calling of this fact, and that I would like to talk to her supervisor. I then explained to the supervisor that I was somewhat less than pleased with the job done, and that I would like to have someone visit so that I could have these issues fixed. And, since it was obviously their poor installation at fault, Sears would have to repair the problems at no charge. Never heard from Sears again….)

  4. Mike M Comment by Mike M

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Misha, I signed up with the National Do Not Call Registry some years ago and it seems to work pretty well. A couple of exceptions though - “Charitable Donation” institutions are not covered and sometimes, like when you buy from Sears, you sign away your privacy rights in the fine print.

  5. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Ooh. I don’t keep blanks around. But I have used an Acme Thunderer

  6. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    We found that dropping our house phone in favor of strictly using our cell phones has cut our telemarketer calls down to just about 0. Once in awhile one of the assmonkies manage to find us…but for the most part our phones don’t ring unless it’s someone we know.

    We decided to drop the house line when we switched from DSL to Cable for our internet. Haven’t regretted it.

  7. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    . . . left over air horn from the Cowboys game, mayhaps?

    “Good Evening Sir, I represent the Acme Vinyl Siding Company, and I was wondering . . . ”

    BbbbbrRRRAAAAPPPPPPPPP!

    Oh, the fun one can have!

  8. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Now you could hand your phone to your three year old and tell them to talk to the nice man……..it works.

  9. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    Try putting them on hold everytime they call.

    With Rap “music” playing as the hold music.

    btw, this is relatively easy to fake with a radio and some patience.

  10. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    Alternate the rap with 1950’s Country (Hank and the boys, Dolly and Porter, etc.)

  11. Mike M Comment by Mike M

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    BbbbbrRRRAAAAPPPPPPPPP!

    Isn’t that the first name of one of those Dems running for President?

  12. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    I thought that was Barrrraaaaffff?

  13. LC MoMinuteMan Comment by LC MoMinuteMan

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Try This…

  14. LC MoMinuteMan Comment by LC MoMinuteMan

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Or This…

  15. LC MoMinuteMan Comment by LC MoMinuteMan

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I think the Postie Monster got me…

  16. Mike M Comment by Mike M

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    LC MoMinuteMan: Abso-fucking-lutely priceless!!

  17. Mike Zeares Comment by Mike Zeares

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Once a telemarketer called my mother, and as she always does she quickly said she wasn’t interested and hung up. A couple minutes later, another call — it was the asswipes supervisor. He yelled at my mother, telling her that BY LAW she had to listen to their entire worthless sales pitch for their useless product and/or service.

    There is no torture too extreme, no death too painful for these bottom feeders.

  18. psychochick Comment by psychochick

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Misha
    It’s generally an auto-dialing machine that keeps calling. You only get a live person when the machine gets through. It won’t realize how often it’s been calling you to know how annoyed you will be.

    I doubt highly that any of you were on our lists, but I used to work for a firm that did telemarketing for liberal groups. I sucked on the phone (took NO for an answer too easily)–I was not one of those people that pestered people to death. I saw one of my evalution slips once: “too accomodating.” How often is that a criticism? I didn’t last long on the phones.

    Since I suck at saying no and have made so many donations, I am on a million lists, (although I did say no the other day!!). We screen all our calls, but the answering machine is temperamental, unfortunately. Now all my friends and doctors have the cell phone number. I don’t dare leave the house phone plugged in. They haunt me. I generally agree with the causes, but that doesn’t mean I want to give constantly. Yes, most of the calls are from the firm I used to work for, ironically.

    Although there are those bogus police/fireman scams. I have no problem donating for the real thing, but these telemarketers only give a small fraction to the causes. And you can tell they are pseudo things–they aren’t for the police dept per se–they are for a police run anti-drug program for kids [not DARE], for instance. And how can you say no for children?

    Question for law enforcement people (and others):

    If an Indian tribe with a very profitable casino has made a MAJOR donation to the sheriff’s dept, is it reasonable to put their logo on the police cars?–caused a huge brouhaha.

  19. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    MZ
    have never heard of such a thing! couldn’t be any more rude and guaranteed to piss off your mother to avoid that product for all eternity

  20. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    He yelled at my mother, telling her that BY LAW she had to listen to their entire worthless sales pitch for their useless product and/or service.

    Ooooooohhhhh….just let some dumbf*ck asswipe like that call me and I’ll make his brain bleed out of his ears for the rest of his worthless life with what I would say to him.

  21. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I sometimes cuss them out, especially after a bad day. But one asshole tells me I HAVE to listen to him? What’s your address, motherfucker? So I can blow your fucking head off! And by the way, what are you selling?……I want to tell all my friends…..
    To my credit though, and my wife still laughs about it twenty years later. I got a collection agent so pissed off he started yelling, screaming he was going to sue me. I yelled back. “GO FOR IT, ASSHOLE!” He hung up on me. When his lawyer called me back later the lawyer started laughing and hung up too.

  22. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I worked in sales about 6 years back… It was a web design firm and we’d call the number on websites offering our design service.. it wasent too bad.. of course it was business numbers, i’d never call a guy’s home.

    Way OT: socaloilman, drop me a email at elchonon1 at juno.com so we can discuss lunch in LA and urinating on diane fein-swine’s office. (i’m kidding!)

  23. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    It’s generally an auto-dialing machine that keeps calling. You only get a live person when the machine gets through. It won’t realize how often it’s been calling you to know how annoyed you will be.

    Not my problem. My mission in life is to make it their problem, and if there’s one thing I excel at, it’s destroying somebody’s entire day and utterly demolishing any self-esteem they might have ever had, all within a few seconds and without even touching them or raising my voice. Heck, I even made one of them cry once. It took me a week before I could stop smiling.

    The best part is: I thoroughly enjoy that part.

    And that, too, is their problem.

    I’m glad you got out of telemarketing, because I would’ve hated to do that to you. But I would have done it nonetheless.

    Trespassing on private property can have serious consequences. My phone and my time are my private property. Telemarketers: You have been warned.

  24. LC NCLivingBrit Comment by LC NCLivingBrit

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Ah the blanks gag. Back home in Blighty the closest I could get to guns was blank firing replicas, several of which I had laying around the house, as you do.

    Answer phone, dipshit sales pitch. I talk, then start babbling about my life being horrible and how I just want to die, but the guy keeps talking trying to sell me insurance….. Sooo I stretch out, grab the blank shooter .45, rack the slide by the phone and mutter goodbye before popping one off right by the handset and dumping the phone onto a tile floor.

    I haven’t laughed that hard in years.

  25. jaybear Comment by jaybear

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I used to have a guy call me every month. He tried to sell me cheap stocks and spoke with a heavy heavy New York accent. He’d call up and call me by name like he knew me for years, then try to hook me with his stock picks. He called every month, always using a different name but was always recognizable by that accent. I would tell him that I worked in the industry and it would be a conflict of interest for me to buy anything…once he didn’t buy my line and asked me what I did in the industry.

    I told him that I worked for the SEC as a securities fraud investigator, he hung up and I haven’t heard from him since.

    Cheapshot
    , my wife and I are currently having a lot of trouble with our 18 year old son (getting arrested this weekend for minor in possession for the second time), our house is an emotional shambles with a lot of anger between me and him, and your Tom Mabes links gave us both a very badly needed laugh…I thank you very much for that.

    wouldn’t mind a few prayers for my son LC’s, he and I haven’t spoken to each other since Saturday night….pretty tense time around here right now. His name is Tommy….you all know my name

  26. LC SkyeChild Comment by LC SkyeChild

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Jaybear,

    I wouldn’t have an 18-year-old son again for anything.

    wouldn’t mind a few prayers for my son

    You got it.

  27. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Prayers outbound for ya Jaybear. Stick to your guns, best thing for him in the long run. God bless.

  28. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    wouldn’t mind a few prayers for my son LC’s, he and I haven’t spoken to each other since Saturday night….pretty tense time around here right now. His name is Tommy….you all know my name

    You got it brother, was a holy terror to my dad from 15 (when I dropped out of HS) and up..

    Thank G-D i havent been arrested or my CCW would be history (still waiting for it)

  29. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Jay,
    You *could* tell him that if he dont behave, your heavely armed buddies at the rot will smack him silly and redo his dental work ;)

  30. psychochick Comment by psychochick

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    JayBear
    So sorry. I’m agnostic, but I’ll send good wishes your way. I have a friend going through that now–she’s just been devastated.

    Misha
    You sound very scary on the phone. I promise never to call you, not that I even know your name. You absolutely would not have been our demographic in a million years, so our paths would not have crossed. That sounds like a good thing!

  31. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Trespassing on private property can have serious consequences. My phone and my time are my private property. Telemarketers: You have been warned.

    Anyone wana furnisdh me with misha’s number and help me call misha ? I am a huge fan of the jerky boys…

    Oh wait better wait till we get to fort knox before pranking misha ;)

  32. jaybear Comment by jaybear

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    Jay,
    You *could* tell him that if he dont behave, your heavely armed buddies at the rot will smack him silly and redo his dental work

    maybe have Crunchie “discuss” things with him Elchonon?

    Regarding re-arranging dental work, that’s what almost got ME arrested along with him. I got the call that he was in custody in the parking lot at the local grocery store. When I got up there, he was sitting in the back of a county deputy’s car. He just turned 18 last week and is on this kick of saying “I’m 18 now, I can make my own decisions”…so I leaned into the car and said “Hey 18 year old, I’m not too impressed with your decision making”. He told me to shut up and that’s when I grabbed him, lifted him out of the car (with one hand!!) and slammed him up against the police car. Funny thing is, the cops backed away and let me do that, but when I cocked my fist back to let him have it..they were all over me. One of them walked me around and said that I was borderline guilty of assault, but that he was grateful that I was acting like a parent should act (that’s a sorry assessment of the state of parenting in this country eh?), but he told me to keep my hands off of my son and told my son not to provoke me anymore. I found out today that he is looking at a maximum sentence of $500 fine and 6 months maximum in jail. He was told that too, but still is blaming me for all of his troubles….hence the silence between us. As a recovering alcoholic, you don’t know how damned badly this hurts to see him doing this.

    Thanks for the prayers y’all, knew I could count on you….sorry to hijack the thread Emperor

  33. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    Misha
    You sound very scary on the phone. I promise never to call you, not that I even know your name.

    Trust me, unless you happen to be a telemarketer, I’m all sweetness and light on the phone. Well, mainly. I just hate telemarketers with a visceral passion, and I enjoy stomping on them.

    wouldn’t mind a few prayers for my son LC’s,

    Incoming, Jaybear. G-d Bless!

  34. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Jay,

    I shoplifted from eckerd at about 10, bought some electronic piece of shit that was broken and they refused to exchange it, was mad pissed as can be understood and poccketed a second but I wasent smart enough to peel off the security sticker so BEEP BEEP BEEP… anyways was only 10 so wtf can they do? they called my parents.. mom picked me up.. when dad came home from work I got a nice spanking on my rear with his belt (multiple times)

    My dad never hesitated to spank me, I got smacked on the face for talking in the synegouge during prayers..

    A thousand times I heard the words “he who spares the rod does not love his kids”

    And its true, I not only love my dad but I respect him more than anyone in the world. Even when I was a alchoholic pot smoking teen it hurt me that I hurt him.

    Took me a few years but I shaped up, havent had a unzivilized arguement with him in 3 years.

  35. LC RobertHuntingdon Comment by LC RobertHuntingdon

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I agree that cold-calls are rude evil and all that, and I wouldn’t be entirely opposed to making them a capital crime, although I say target the boss not the 11-bravo in the trenches…

    It’s one thing for collectors to call. You owe them money. It’s another if you asked them to call and they called you back. It’s also yet another ball of wax if you call a number on the screen for a TV ad (or the like) and they give you a hard sell. (Not that I *like* that, but I don’t — quite — consider it evil.) And if you have an existing relationship and they want to sell you an upgrade it’s (barely) still OK. But if they call you totally cold, even if they’re the ultra-saints of ultimate compassion with whipped cream and cherries on top because they need money for some incredibly important charity work that you even agree with, they’re in the wrong. Period.

    I basically have a two step solution. One, I only have a cell phone. Means I only get calls from people I already have a business relationship with (and very few of those). Two, when they call, I say “I’m not interested” and hang up IMMEDIATELY. I don’t give them time to offer me one of the “recovery” lines, as I’m *intimately* aware of the methodologies they use and I refuse to give them a chance to attempt to employ them.

    Sure it’s not as viciously fun, but having worked on a phone system before as an INBOUND answerer, I sympathize with people a bit more who feel that’s the only work they can get. Even the cold callers, although only VERY slightly in their case. But it’s better (barely) than them being on welfare. I won’t give them the time of day but I won’t make their ears ring either.

    RH

  36. LC Moriarty Comment by LC Moriarty

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Ah… reminds me of my old college roommate.

    Every so often our local liberal rag of a newspaper would call, soliciting for subscriptions. His approach never changed. He’d put on his best, gravelly, slightly nasal and aged New York accent (having lived there for a few years) and you’d hear something like this:

    (RING)

    Hello?

    ahah…

    Ahah…

    AHAH…

    I’M BLIIIIND!!
    (SLAM!)

  37. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Even the cold callers, although only VERY slightly in their case. But it’s better (barely) than them being on welfare. I won’t give them the time of day but I won’t make their ears ring either.

    Bah humbug. They could start panhandling instead. I have more respect for them. Or even go to law school.

    That being said, most of them I’ll just hang up on or ignore, but this particular company belonged to the obnoxious kind that not only persist in calling you at all hours of the day, FOR A FUCKING WEEK, they don’t even have the common courtesy of leaving as much as a message. Heck, even an automated message I can live with, as long as they only deliver ONE.

    But calling me all day for several days in a row in spite of the obvious fact that I wasn’t going to answer, ever, without giving me as much as a clue as to who they were or what they were calling about…

    Nope. No mercy. Fuck ‘em if they can’t take a joke.

    Oh, and another pet peeve of mine:

    I pick up phone and say “hello.”

    Voice on line immediately says “can I speak to XXXXX?”

    Here’s ANOTHER hint to any hapless telemarketing wannabes (and other callers, for that matter) wandering by:

    STATE NAME AND BUSINESS ALONG WITH REASON FOR CALLING, THEN ASK TO TALK TO SOMEBODY.

    It’s called COMMON FUCKING COURTESY, you Neanderthal throwbacks to the most eminently forgettable parts of human history. Unless you’re a relative, close friend or you’re having my fucking baby, you do NOT get to just ask for me right off the bat without an introduction.

    The End.

  38. Unregistered Comment by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    LC MoMinuteMan: Abso-fucking-lutely priceless!!

    The first one got stolen and blogged.

    ROFLMFAOASTC!!!!! 

    wouldn’t mind a few prayers for my son LC’s, he and I haven’t spoken to each other since Saturday night….pretty tense time around here right now. His name is Tommy….you all know my name

    Jaybear, I just inherited a 15-year-old daughter that’s been in a little trouble herself.  I’m saying one for you right now.

  39. Spartan24 Comment by Spartan24

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    My rule is that if they do not know how to pronounce my last name (not pronounced like it is spelled) then they do not know me and I do not answer. About a year ago when my husband was in trucking school his trainer told us he got a free laptop for going on some website. We STILL get the calls.

  40. Unregistered Comment by The Lone Haranguer

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Originally posted by Spartan24:
    My rule is that if they do not know how to pronounce my last name (not pronounced like it is spelled) then they do not know me and I do not answer.

    That’s a good rule. My surname, though unusual, is pronounced exactly like it is spelled, yet they still get it wrong.

    My typical rejoinder is something like, “This phone is for my friends, family and business associates to call me, and you are none of those, shithead.” I haven’t had to use it in a couple of years, owing largely, I think, to using my landline mostly for the Internet (yes, I’m a dinosaur) while at home.

    I’m glad I learned a trade so I will never be desperate enough to have to get a job telemarketing.

  41. Princess Natasha Comment by Princess Natasha

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I have a home phone, still, but it is one of those over the internet thingies, so I am not bothered by telemarketers. I had a land line back in Boston… Had a blast with the stupid wankers. Mostly just cursing at them, but sometimes I would just start speaking Russian… They are obnoxious assholes, and I have no pity for the motherfuckers.

  42. Fuzzhead Comment by Fuzzhead

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I will tell them I’m not interested twice, and if they persist, I go into fun mode, though sometimes when they ask for me, and I know it’s a telemarketer, I’ll say “I’m sorry. He passed away.” That usually gets some type of apology and a quick end to the phone call.

    Most of the calls I get are for loan/debt consolidation, etc. When I say I’m not interested, sometimes they’ll start telling me I can save money, so I tell them that I don’t want to save money, that spending more makes me feel rich. They usually quit then.

    Or, I go into “intellectually handicapped” mode, and ask if they want to be my friend, and stuff like that.

    One of my friends lets them go through the whole speech then says “Sorry, what was that? I wasn’t listening.” Usually they hang up after a few times through.

    The do-not-call list has definitely cut down on the number of telemarketer calls, though.

  43. psychochick Comment by psychochick

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    You know what’s kind of funny? I suck so badly as a telemarketer, but I ended up running customer service at a dot.com. Most of the calls were incoming pleas for help, but sometimes we would call someone to tell them their order was delayed or to see if they wanted an alternative item. I had someone hang up on me, because she assumed I was a telemarketer (I have a very soothing voice). Other people would lie and say they weren’t there (assuming again). Then I would start leaving a message about their order, and they would go “Oh, it’s me,” and I would be confused for a moment. I thought it was funny that I no longer sucked on the phone. I actually was doing data entry and took a few calls to help out during lunch breaks, but I was quickly moved into CS.

    Misha
    I would have difficulty using your preferred approach–just not what I’m used to

  44. Unregistered Comment by LC & IB Random Numbers

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    You should try the Bun-Bun approach.
    http://sluggy.com/daily.php?date=031014

  45. psychochick Comment by psychochick

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    DO NOT CALL ORGANIZATION LIST

    (Yes BC–I”m talking to myself at night again)

    I thought of something that might be useful. The organizations I worked for all had a list you could be put on to never receive calls again. All you had to do was ask, and I used to work IT there–I know the names were flagged.

    Maybe your organizations can do the same thing. I’ve heard complaints here about the RNC calling for money too much. I don’t know if you want to ban them forever–you might like the next president. However, it should be an option.

  46. Deathknyte Comment by Deathknyte

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I consider it a challenge to waste of much of thier time possible. After all it’s them calling long distance.

  47. LCBrendan Comment by LCBrendan

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    It’s 430 in the morning in Texas…wonder what Misha would say to an Australian kookaburra wakeup call??? :-D

  48. psychochick Comment by psychochick

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Brendan

    1) you’re probably ending your life unneccesarily
    –maybe you could survive if you promise to send kangaroo toys for the kids

    2) I think he’s up pretty late–he’s done things for me late, but I don’t remember exactly how late

  49. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    My rule is that if they do not know how to pronounce my last name (not pronounced like it is spelled) then they do not know me and I do not answer.

    Similar to my rule

    That’s a good rule. My surname, though unusual, is pronounced exactly like it is spelled, yet they still get it wrong.

    But this is the way it is.

    Biggest clue is when they ask for my wife with my surname. Despite having been married eleven years, she still goes by her maiden name, so it’s a BIG tip-off.

  50. Unregistered Trackback by dustbury.com

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Personalized wring…

    There’s a Do Not Call Registry, but you drop off after five years, and anyone with Caller ID (and rather a lot of people without it) can tell you that the Registry is more honored in the breach. Which means……

  51. Unregistered Comment by WC Varones

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Fucking Telemarketers

    A good idea. You forgo the KY, I presume?

  52. DJ Allyn,  ITW Comment by DJ Allyn, ITW

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    You answered the phone? Why the hell for? Now they know you are there, and will not stop calling.

    The do not call registry is a good start, but that is only good if telemarketers bother to subscribe to the service. Most don’t because it is pretty spendy. They have to pay for each area code they use.

  53. BauerPower Comment by BauerPower

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I had some telemarketer call and try and sell me a Time Life Series of books, on some revisionist history series. So, I turned it around and offered them a Macabre Books Series of my own (made up of course).

    The titles include:

    Driving Do’s and Don’t by Ted Kennedy
    Clean and Sober by Keith Richards
    Amateur Aviation Made Easy by John Denver
    Defensive Driving by Princess Diana Spencer
    How to Get More Bang for Your Buck by Theodore Kaczynski aka The Unibomber
    All My Children by Michael Jackson
    Faithfulness by Bill Clinton
    Tolerance by Louis Farrakhan

    and many many more…..

    They were begging me to stop. And I never heard from them since. Or, if the TM scumbag calls, I like the mumbling, and going, Que? Que? No halbo ingles, adios!

  54. JanetMae Comment by JanetMae

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I’ve gotten into the habit, after having the SAME FRIGGING 800 numbers call over and over, of answering and hanging up immediately. Stops the ringing.

    If the keep pestering me, I will answer and tell them I’m not interested and hang up. I used to put up with their sales pitches, where they won’t take no for an answer, but no more.

    When we first moved into our house, it was in a brand new subdivision, and we used to have people knocking on our door all the time. I had one salesman that would not take no for an answer, and even kept talking after I finally slammed the door in his face.

    Needless to say, I don’t answer the doorbell anymore, either, unless I know who it is.

  55. Spartan24 Comment by Spartan24

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    When we first moved into our house, it was in a brand new subdivision, and we used to have people knocking on our door all the time. I had one salesman that would not take no for an answer, and even kept talking after I finally slammed the door in his face.

    I actually had some real estate agent knock on the door and ask “when were you planning on moving”. I was horrified, we went through hell to get this house and will be here for some time. My roomate told me that Hispanic real estate agents are common in our neighborhood and are trying to get more Hispanics in the area. I dont know if this is true but her approach was pretty rude and obnoxious. I told her to leave and we were DEFINATELY not moving anytime soon.

  56. Kristopher Comment by Kristopher

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I had a telemarketing tank in Canada decide to bother me once.

    I chewed out the caller, and threatened legal action ( I was on the do not call list ). Then I chewed out his supervisor.

    The owner of the firm eventually got on the line, laughed at me, and told me I could do nothing about him, since his office was in Toronto, and he would direct his people to keep calling me out of spite.

    I took a good look at Canadian law on such matters over the internet, and discovered two things:

    1 ) Canadian law is much more harsh on these assholes.
    2 ) Canadian law applies if one of the ends of the call is in Canada.

    I found the agency in charge, and filed a formal complaint over the phone, and via fax.

    The official who handled my complaint called the next day, and let me know that this telemarketer will probably never bother me again.

  57. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Needless to say, I don’t answer the doorbell anymore, either, unless I know who it is.

    Answering the door with a loaded .45 on your hip does wonders to convince them that maybe they should move on.

  58. Princess Natasha Comment by Princess Natasha

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Answering the door with a loaded .45 on your hip does wonders to convince them that maybe they should move on.

    So is answering the door butt-ass nekkid. Granted, those were Jehovah’s witnesses, but you should have seen’em run!

  59. TheHat Comment by TheHat

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Phone: Put me on your do not call list. Thank you. good by. {hang up}

    I love the ‘answering the door butt-ass nekkid’ idea. But I also love the 45 on the hip idea. Merge the two?

  60. Princess Natasha Comment by Princess Natasha

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Merge the two?

    Splendid plan!!

  61. Rurik Comment by Rurik

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    When I get a call asking for me by first name….

    Is this G….?

    In my most formal voice - “No, the name is Mister. You want to try that again from the top, Jimbolina?”

    On one occasion, some woman called me from the subscription department of the Red Star-Trib (a very bad beginning in itself), and opened with a really cool, laid back, “Hey G…., how you hangin’, man?”
    She got a rather puzzled-sounding, “Do I know you? Who is this? Have we slept together sometime? Oh. Or are you trying to? Oh. Then in that case, show me a little courtesy and address me as Mister”.

    If they want to try again after an unfortunate start, we can progress to an equally unfortunate second act.

    With the police benevolent (isc) calls, I like to point out that this seems very much like extortion and accuse them of a shakedown operation. “You’re going to turn this country into a third world thugocracy.” I once had a guy almost in tears and apologizing by the time I got done.

    Your Emperorship, I know and share your fondness for rusty knives, but for telemarketers, I think the fitting penalty would be pouring molten lead into their ears.

  62. Rurik Comment by Rurik

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    And when it is the Republicans calling to thank me for my years of support (I departed them in mid 1995, when the Newt began punking for Clinton) and asking for a contribution, I tell them to “get your fucking pesos from your beaner base.”

  63. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Merge the two?

    Works for me!

  64. AyUaxe Comment by AyUaxe

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    A rude telemarketer deserves what they get. Most are just doing what the state employment agency sent them to do–the minimum to collect a paycheck. No reason to threaten someone over that. I do routinely ask ‘em for their home number and time zone, so I’ll know when they’re having dinner or heading off to bed, i.e., when to call. Not one has given it out. In the final analysis, these people don’t have any real control over who they call or when–they frankly ain’t worth a bullet. Heap coals on their heads by being polite and brief in telling them never to call you again and may God bless them with a life and a decent job.

  65. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I actually had some real estate agent knock on the door and ask “when were you planning on moving”.

    Misha approach: Draw my sidearm (just clear the holster, don’t be aiming at nobody, but that falls under gun safety, so you all know that, RIGHT?) and say “the REAL question here is ‘when are you planning on moving off my doorstep, trespasser, and will you be moving under your own power?’”

  66. LC&IB Vulcanrider Comment by LC&IB Vulcanrider

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Merge the two?

    Good idea, but my pistol belt and holster chafe…

  67. TheBoid Comment by TheBoid

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Hey Misha, I had a post not show up on the Fred comments.

    Was it something I said?

  68. Unregistered Comment by Rainy

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    jaybear - thinking of you and your son. I’ve had my own troubles with my almost 21-year-old. I can only council and hope that he listens. My sister has had a terrible year with her son - freshman in college. He seems to be the only one who gets caught drinking although the Nazi SAs in his dorm make everything worse. The last incident was when she called the police on his friend, who was just staying to sleep it off (not underage). Ny nephew yelled at her “What did you do that for?” and she called the police on him. My sister has now taken him out of the school and enrolled him in the local community college so he can live at home.

    As for telemarketers, Thank G-d we have a no-call list in Colorado. For about the first 6 months of the list, I still had a few callers. I took the time to get their contact info, informed them about the law, and reported them to the state AG (we have a website). the law applied to out of state companies too. We never get calls now. Unfortunately, charities and polititians are exempt. And it does no good to tell charities to take you off of their list, they never do. We usually just hang up, depends on my mood. But I will never donate to the Lupus Foundation or the Disabled American Veterans - ever. Actually, I will never buy anything from anyone who calls on the phone, so don’t bother. And political calls are usually machines, it does no good to say anything. It does make me less likely to vote for the person or issue though. I already got a recorded message from the McCain campaign!

  69. Unregistered Comment by LC Staci GBOR

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Depending on my mood and which number they are bugging me at, I handle them differently.

    My private line and if in the mood to mess around (if not, cut them off and tell them to put me on the DNC list….companies really do get fined BTW.)

    If it is a guy, I start hitting on him and telling the guy how I’ve been lonely and if he makes house visits. I really go off on all kinds of tangents. Telling them they sound cute/sexy/horny on the phone. How fate brought us together. Usually freaks them out and leaves me in hysterics.

    If not in the mood for above or if it is a female, I make sure I use the word “fuck” in every sentence. “No fucking way” “That sounds like a fucking awesome idea”. It’s pretty funny.

    Or I ask them to hold on. And then put the phone down. Sometimes, I will start to make noises like I’m having kinky sex or something.

    I just figure I should make it fun if I can. At my work number, I’m just the bitch that only I know I can be. It’s good for some of my coworkers to hear it every now and again too.

  70. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    So is answering the door butt-ass nekkid. Granted, those were Jehovah’s witnesses, but you should have seen’em run!

    errr whats your address again? i’m coming by to sell something!

  71. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    So is answering the door butt-ass nekkid. Granted, those were Jehovah’s witnesses, but you should have seen’em run!

    Absent is misha’s “jpg, jpg, jpg!!!” lol

  72. Tom Doniphon Comment by Tom Doniphon

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    “the REAL question here is ‘when are you planning on moving off my doorstep, trespasser, and will you be moving under your own power?’”

    The sound of a shotgun’s action cycling can communicate that much more succinctly, and as a bonus, you usually don’t even have to open the door!

  73. Unregistered Comment by LC Staci GBOR

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I liked how traveling salesmen were handled in that movie Secondhand Lions.

  74. LC MoMinuteMan Comment by LC MoMinuteMan

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    RE: Comment #60 - Princess Nat, Having seen your AK-47 pix, I would say that idea would start an epic struggle between two of man’s most primal instincts, mating and self preservation….

  75. Kristopher Comment by Kristopher

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Stick a black thumbtack in your door sill.

    J-witness and mormon code:

    White = already saved

    Red = hates us, only pester if bored

    Black = biker gang or Jeffrey Dalmer … stay far, far away.

  76. HarleyRace (Uber-enlightened) Comment by HarleyRace (Uber-enlightened)

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    First executive order to leave my desk when I become President will be specifying the death penalty without trial or appeal for telemarketing

    So you a commie who hates commerce?!

    Collectivist swine!

  77. Cheapshot911 Comment by Cheapshot911

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    If you’re bored, add the pesky number or name to the list at whocalledus.
    It’s a handy little toolbox, see who’s screwin’ up, maybe good enough for a class action..
    Sic’ em’.

  78. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I used to answer “unknown name” in my best official sounding, authoritarian, bored Marine on phone watch voice “National Command Center, Nuclear Launch Center, Lt. G… speaking, be advised this is an unsecured line”.

    After a little stammering by the creep asking for me I launch into “How DID you get this number?” If they didn’t hang up by that point, I pulled a Tom Mabe and started talking to “someone” over a partially covered handset, “Got the trace? Good, get the FBI on the line and give them the address..”. They always hung up at that point.

    Crunchie Jr. loved it, bangie thang would just look at me and shake her head, then walk away. She does that a lot. I wonder why.

  79. og Comment by og

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I just want to take the fuckers that RUN these pink collar outhouses of telemarketing bullshit and wear out their pain receptors slowly, one at a time, until they have no nerve endings left, and then deep fry portions of their body and make them eat themselves to death.

    Dang, was that out loud again?

  80. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    My land line rings at least half a dozen times a day now……I use my cell. I find it funny, loan companies and the like, even lawyers as I am involved in a legal controversy at present. But it is generally republicans seeking donations. I am considering changing my greeting, you can well imagine. But by and large I do not use the phone, my wife likes having it around for emergencies and such. As for me…I ignore it.

  81. psychochick Comment by psychochick

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Og
    You sound exciting–tell me more!

    Caveman
    I hope that’s not still from the medical bill issues (not that it’s any of my business)

  82. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Jaybear….I just saw your post, put together and e-mailed you a long letter relating some mutual experiences we share. Perhaps Tommy could read some of them….I found your story remeniscent, for you see, I turned eighteen in boot camp. My big mistake was announcing it to a friend. Those duty belts leave welts good for a month. You cannot outrun eighty dudes, God knows I tried. And nobody else had a birthday either, not one of eighty guns in three months……..

  83. Unregistered Comment by LC Turbotaz

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I know..dead thread, but wanted to share what I found today on the same problem - apparently from Capitol One & JC Penny card holders

  84. psychochick Comment by psychochick

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    C Turbotaz
    Your link is not happy