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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » When You’re a pusslim, ANY “Root Cause” Will Do
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Need a justification for terrorism and suicide bombings? A knighthood will do the trick, at least according to the religion of piss (link thanks to LC Rob):

Sir Salman Rushdie celebrates his 60th birthday today in familiar circumstances: he is once again the subject of death threats across the Islamic world.

Once again? As far as we recall, the death sentence issued by Ayatollah Assahollah Khomeini was never annulled. Of course, you wouldn’t know it if your only source for news were the “news” media.

Eighteen years after the Ayatollah Khomeini issued a fatwa calling on Muslims to kill him, a government minister in Pakistan said yesterday that Rushdie’s recent knighthood justified suicide bombing.

A government minister in Pakistan, our “loyal and valuable allies”, no less. You know, the same “loyal and valuable allies and eternal friends” that are currently serving as the R&R headquarters for half of al-Qaeda and assorted other mooselimb terrorist assholes for allah.

The question of blasphemy in The Satanic Verses, Rushdie’s 1988 tale of a prophet misled by the devil, remains a deeply sensitive issue in much of the Muslim world and the author’s inclusion in the Queen’s Birthday Honours last week has inflamed anti-British sentiment.

Inflamed assholes isn’t all that rare in a 7th century “culture” not believing in toilet paper.

Gerald Butt, editor of the authoritative Middle East Economic Survey, told The Times: “It will be interpreted as an action calculated to goad Muslims at a time when the atmosphere is already very tense and Britain’s standing in the region is very low because of its involvement in Iraq and its lack of action in tackling the Palestine issue.”

What a comically apt last name. No, Britain’s refusal to ally herself with Nazi paleosimian ragheads eager to finish Hitler’s job hasn’t done anything to endear her to the goose-stepping, deranged fig farmers, which is something Britain should be quite proud of.

Hardliners in Iran revived calls for his murder yesterday. Mehdi Kuchakzadeh, a Tehran MP, declared: “Rushdie died the moment the late Imam [Ayatollah Khomeini] issued the fatwa.”

Just a reminder, you cockheaded camel botherer: Now, eighteen years later, Rushdie is still very much alive, and Assahollah Khomeini remains satisfyingly dead. Really, if you can’t appreciate the humor in that, then you must be a… mooselimb.

The Organisation to Commemorate Martyrs of the Muslim World, a fringe hardline group, offered a reward of $150,000 (£75,000) to any successful assassin.

The problem here isn’t a lack of money, you fools, it’s a failure to perform. A malady not at all unknown to “males” of the mooselimb persuasion. Just ask any mooselimb woman. Unless she dresses up as a goat with pigtails, of course.

Forouz Rajaefar, the group’s secretary general, said: “The British and the supporters of the anti-Islam Salman Rushdie could rest assured that the writer’s nightmare will not end until the moment of his death and we will bestow kisses on the hands of whomsoever is able to execute this apostate.”

We have a feeling that he’ll die three times of old age before you mewling incompetents ever get close, no matter what parts of would-be assassins’ bodies you offer to kiss.

Effigies of Rushdie and the Queen were burnt in Pakistan, where presidential elections at the end of the year have destablised an already volatile political climate. Hundreds of protesters in Multan, Karachi and Lahore set fire to British flags and chanted “Death to Britain, death to Rushdie” and Islamist leaders called for nationwide protests after Friday prayers.

Those wonderful, wonderful Pakistani “allies” of ours.

Quick question: If you burn an effigy of somebody under a fartwaaaaah, do you get paid in Monopoly money?

Ijaz-ul-Haq, the Religious Affairs Minister, told the assembly in Islamabad that the award of the knighthood excused suicide bombing. “If somebody has to attack by strapping bombs to his body to protect the honour of the Prophet then it is justified,” he said.

How about we strap your body to a bomb, a nuke more specifically, and drop you on Islamabad?

He later retracted his statement, explaining that

…he wasn’t aware that any infidels were around to hear him…

he had intended to say that knighting Rushdie will foster extremism.

Oh. Well, that makes it much better. We thought for a moment there that “if somebody has to attack by strapping bombs to his body to protect the honor of the pedophile prophet then it is justified” meant what it actually said, but then again, we’re not all that familiar with the “nuance” that liberals adore so much. In reality, you were saying that “if somebody wants to murder women and children because somebody who wrote a book we don’t like got a knighthood, then that’s perfectly fine and dandy.”

Huge difference, goat boy.

“If someone blows himself up, he will consider himself justified. How can we fight terrorism when those who commit blasphemy are rewarded by the West?

How can we fight terrorism when those who commit it are rewarded with sanctuary in the mountains and provinces of our so-called “ally”, Pakistan?

We demand an apology by the British government. Their action has hurt the sentiments of 1.5 billion Muslims.”

Why don’t you go burn an embassy or something, Habib? That seems to be all that you bleating butt-pounders can respond with when your pwecious feeewings get hurt.

Pakistan’s national assembly earlier unanimously passed a resolution condemning Rushdie’s knighthood, which it said would encourage “contempt” for the Prophet Muhammad.

And who could possibly feel contempt for a known murderer, thief, liar, and schizophrenic child-rapist?

Rushdie was forced to go into hiding for almost a decade after the Ayatollah Khomeini issued the death sentence over The Satanic Verses.

On Valentine’s Day in 1989 the spiritual figurehead of the Iranian revolution pronounced on Teheran radio that: “The author of The Satanic Verses, which is against Islam, the Prophet, the Koran, and all those involved in its publication who were aware of its content, are sentenced to death.”

In Britain, the subsequent hate campaign helped to politicise and radicalise a generation of young British Muslims. The taxpayer is believed to have spent more than £10 million protecting Rushdie.

How horrid. The Crown should have handed over the filthy bugger to the Iranians instead, right, Times? Imagine that: Frivolously wasting taxpayer funds on standing up for freedom of speech and safety from terrorism when it would’ve been so much easier to just hand over the bloody wog to his executioners instead. You must have had a conservative government back then or something.

Only Khomeini had the power officially to lift the fatwa and he died without doing so, but in 1998, the Iranian Foreign Minister promised his British counterpart, Robin Cook, that Iran would not implement it.

Which, of course, means absolutely nothing to the ululating goat buggerers, since fartwaaaaahs aren’t annulled by secular foreign ministers, but it sure makes for a good soundbite, doesn’t it?

Gradually, Rushdie emerged back into the literary spotlight and in recent years has appeared at events in London and New York, where he now lives.

It is understood that when he is in this country, Rushdie continues to receive round-the-clock police protection.

Muhammad Ali Hosseini, Iran’s foreign affairs spokesman, said on Sunday that the knighthood “will definitely put the British officials in confrontation with Islamic societies. This act shows that insulting Islamic sacred values is not accidental. It is planned, organised, guided and supported by some Western countries.”

Kudos to Britain for not caving to the Neanderthals on this issue.

Oh, and Muhammad? Try this for “insulting:”

We always find it amusing how the swirlies of allah’s name caress the dangling testicles of that filthy hog so perfectly.

25 Responses to “When You’re a pusslim, ANY “Root Cause” Will Do”
  1. hitnrun Comment by hitnrun

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    It’s amazing. No matter how many press releases circulate, like this one, where the followers of Mohammed use quotes such as these…

    How can we fight terrorism when those who commit blasphemy are rewarded by the West?

    It will be interpreted as an action calculated to goad Muslims.

    Pakistan’s national assembly earlier unanimously passed a resolution condemning Rushdie’s knighthood, which it said would encourage “contempt” for the Prophet Muhammad.

    “This act shows that insulting Islamic sacred values is not accidental”

    …to justify this…

    Rushdie’s recent knighthood justified suicide bombing…Hardliners in Iran revived calls for his murder yesterday. “Rushdie died the moment the late Imam [Ayatollah Khomeini] issued the fatwa.”
    …“The author of The Satanic Verses…are sentenced to death.”…Hundreds of protesters in Multan, Karachi and Lahore set fire to British flags and chanted “Death to Britain, death to Rushdie.”…we will bestow kisses on the hands of whomsoever is able to execute this apostate.”

    …liberals still consider FEMA’s response time, talk radio, Gitmo, and SCOTUS ruling against Affirmative Action to be the real assaults on our freedoms and way of life.

  2. MegaTroopX Comment by MegaTroopX

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    Nothing like the scent of inflated pisslamic egos barbecued Misha Style.

  3. Unregistered Comment by jonthum

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    Have Muslims ever done anything positive? All I see is hatred and butt-hurt.

  4. Unregistered Comment by Infidel River Rat

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    Muzzies, the sodomizing, any-animal humping, inbred dregs of the third world using a death cult as an excuse for a religion, demanding that WE tolerate them!

  5. Unregistered Comment by aries37

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    If I was born with “The Anchor of Islam” around my neck, I would be pissed at everything too!

  6. LC Beaker Comment by LC Beaker

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    Can we just start nuking them now? Or do we still believe that Islam is a religion that is mostly peaceful and tolerant?

  7. Redeard Comment by Redeard

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    With the “protestors” burning an effigy of the queen, does that give every Brit the right to burn down a Pakistani embassy?
    And will the MSM refuse to carry pictures of this, as it might offend a British citizen?
    Just askin.

  8. Unregistered Comment by Tyris

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    Holy shiiiiit that was funny. It’s a good thing I had drained my tea mug beforehand, or I’d be cleaning my screen. It’s good ol’ Salman can get go out and about in public spaces without some mentally molested moron actually managing to kill him. Too bad similar mindless munchkins have to try and raise a stink about it.

    I also fail to see how someone who turns himself into chunky salsa can feel justified at all. I mean, all the parts that do the thinking and feeling just became a new layer of paint on the terrain, right? And what’s up with the 1.5 billion number? A few months ago it was always referred to as ‘over a billion’. Can’t tell me they reproduce THAT fast.

    I had forgotten about that picture… I’m sorry, I loved the verbal smackdown greatly, but the sight of that beautiful piece of art again after so long still sends me into body-wracking chuckles. Mostly because I can imagine those guys marching around with their “Behead those who insult our religion” signs soiling themselves and frothing at the mouth from the mere sight of it. I would honestly pay good money to see their reaction and consider every penny well spent. How come Rushdie gets a fatwas against his life but you don’t? That’d be something to be proud of. Ah well. Oh, and it’s a WANTED poster, right? Shouldn’t there be a ‘dead or alive’ at the bottom?

  9. purple raider Comment by purple raider

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    To paraphrase Loonie Louie Farrakhan:

    Islam is a gutter religion.

    Piss on them and their offspring.

    May the fleas of a thousand camels infest their armpits.

    Wait, that’s already happened.

  10. Spartan24 Comment by Spartan24

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    Islam is not only a death cult it is also a good shakedown organization. From CAIR coercing businesses to allow Muslims to take prayer breaks and wear Islamic dress to Mosques sending thugs to threaten former Muslims, Islam is doing well in the fear business.

  11. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    jonthum
    well, he’s atheist now, but they did produce Salman Rushdie (and tried to kill him)

    Actually, two British Islamic clerics were murdered for saying on tv that they didn’t think he should be killed.

    I was really surprised to read that major bookchains in the US pulled “The Satanic Verses” off their shelves for safety reasons.

  12. L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter Comment by L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter

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    Sheesh…All the pissing and moaning…You’d think they were democrats or something…

  13. Unregistered Comment by mindy1

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    What does not piss off radical muslims anymore?

  14. Unregistered Comment by leoni2

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    Gee, and he’s still alive. What the matter, boyos, can’t you find him? Whine, you monkeys, whine.

  15. ACLPoo Comment by ACLPoo

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    Savages in Iranian gov’t take pleasure in sending him a promise of his execution, every year like clockwork on Valentines Day. He gets a letter Feb 14 every year confirming their promise to kill him.
    Amazing what a country like that can get away with for so long. We as Westerners are GODS among insects, it’s time we started acting like it and not only invade Iran, but totally take over, rename it, and instead of gently coaxing them to be nice to one another whilst we get slaughtered, we should surgically and without any restraint, impose our way of life on them, as they would with us.
    100 years later as they water their lawns and take their kids to CHURCH on Sundays, they’ll wonder what the hell they were thinking….and all the while as they watch Spike on a 52″ LCD TV in each of their homes, they’ll thank the US for dragging them into civilization.

  16. terry smyth Comment by terry smyth

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    actually aclpoo they will be thanking us(the west) in the next 5 years if somebody gets their bums into gear and gets something done about the quods and the republican guard that have slaughterd half of all the US casualties by their use of ieds etc in Iraq. What are you guys waiting for, the writing is on the wall….iran is involved in the war on terror biff them one and biff them a really good one.
    Sorry nancy is convinced that they are good guys, she knows as she sucked off the second in cokmand in syria so she KNOWS.
    Give it to the buggers, from an aussie

  17. BauerPower Comment by BauerPower

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    Religion of Tolerance and Peace wants a writer dead, what a shock. These are the same degenerates pissed off at Danish op-ed cartoons lampooning Muhammad The Pedophile. Who is shocked at this hateful whining piss-ants anymore? I am not……

    FYI, the last time Muslims or anyone issued a death threat on the Queen or any sitting British Monarch, their happy ass got invaded and BLOWN UP. See Sepoy Mutiny, see Sudan War, see Egypt, see fuckin Afghanistan…… The Brits could always revert to their old lionish ways, instead of being a bunch of pussies. Strike that, the leaders can revert to bravery, and not hold back the idignance and growing wrath of the British populace.

  18. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    We always find it amusing how the swirlies of allah’s name caress the dangling testicles of that filthy hog so perfectly.

    You just can’t make it up now can you. What a pisser…uh ohh…I suppose I shouldn’t mention the Piss and the Mutt-Fuck Mo’ in the same sentence. They might line up for a mickey or two of Utopian Urine™ somewhere.

    Fanusi-

    I’ll note also that the “Sir” (Hey, remember when Knights were supposed to _defend_ the realm?) Iqbal Sacraine still supports the death fatwa.

    The Hell with them.

    Excellent point, I forgot about that and agreed…Fuck ‘Em All, Repeatedly

  19. TheCount Comment by TheCount

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    Eighteen years after the Ayatollah Khomeini issued a fatwa calling on Muslims to kill him, a government minister in Pakistan said yesterday that Rushdie’s recent knighthood justified suicide bombing.

    A government minister in Pakistan, our “loyal and valuable allies”, no less. You know, the same “loyal and valuable allies and eternal friends” that are currently serving as the R&R headquarters for half of al-Qaeda and assorted other mooselimb terrorist assholes for allah.

    Hot Air Link

    Apparently, the ministers in Pakistan are wanting the Queen to Knight Osama Bin Laden. So, in the minds of the followers of the pedophile prophet (may hog piss be upon him), in order to rectify the knighting of Rushdie, the queen needs to knight a mass murderer and terrorist to “equate” things.

    The Emperor is correct to point out that our pansy ass gub’ment calls them ALLIES! What a disgrace! However, I think the queen needs to call their bluff. Have Pakistan round up ol’OBL and get him to Britain to be knighted. When the day comes for the ceremony, as the queen begins to Dub him Sir Osama, she takes that sword and lobs his head clean off. Then rolls him over on his back right there on BBC, and buries the Union Jack right in his ass. Then gives the finger to all the rioting Muzzies in the street.

    That would be great. But, with the rampant PC going on in Britain, she would be charged with murder and fed to the fatwa brigades by the MPs to get votes in their districts.

  20. LittleRott84 Comment by LittleRott84

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    With the “protestors” burning an effigy of the queen, does that give every Brit the right to burn down a Pakistani embassy?

    Hand me that Molotov, would you?

  21. ACLPoo Comment by ACLPoo

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    We should send them that british navy man…was it georgie or something…who cried like a baby upon return and complained about his iPod being stolen.
    Maybe they’ll leave Rushdie alone in trade?

  22. ACLPoo Comment by ACLPoo

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    Operator Mechanic Arthur Batchelor! This time, though, send him with a hole box of iPods.

  23. Xystus Comment by Xystus

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    As someone’s said here before, insulted/offended seems to be the default setting for these people. They evidently go about with a big block of wood–or is it black stone?–on their shoulder. Time to trot out Islamic Rage Boy (he of the head-mounted fisted arms) again. “Death to Mickey Mouse! Death to Donald Duck!”

    Can y’all believe the mobs used to chant “Death to Karter” some 27 years ago? Nowadays , of course, they’d never think of it.

  24. DJM Comment by DJM

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    The funny thing about Rushdie’s fictional book, “The Satanic Verses,” is that it is based on one chapter from the Qur’an called ‘The Star.’

    Chapter 53, verse 21 states: “These are the exalted cranes (goddesses), Whose intercession is to be hoped for.” In others words, Muhammad praises three pagan deities in order to placate the Meccans. (Note: This verse has since been alter or removed in most modern Qur’ans.)

    The verse caused outrage, even in Muhammad’s time, and followers began to question the ‘prophet’. So, old Mo came up with this gem: “Every Messenger or Prophet before you recited the message Satan cast into his recitation. Allah abrogates what Satan casts. Then Allah established his verses. Allah is Knower, Wise.” (22:52)

    Further, chapter 53 reveals some interesting facts about Muhammad. Read about it here:

    http://www.prophetofdoom.net/Prophet_of_Doom_11_Satans_Bargain.Islam