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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » In the Presence of Greatness
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(Thanks to the indispensable Sir Christopher)

A “journalist”, for lack of a more accurate and descriptive word, dons his kneepads, drops and reaches out for the Great One’s zipper with trembling hands:

Al Gore’s image as a rock-star eco-warrior gets another high-voltage jolt of celebrity endorsement Saturday when the music world gathers to raise awareness for global warming at Live Earth.

And, according to our sources, the music world will be gathering to play for each other mainly, considering the less that enthusiastic response at the ticket booths.

But despite a growing clamour for the beaten 2000 presidential election candidate to enter next year’s race for the White House, the chances of Gore running for office again remain remote, analysts say.

Bugger all! We’d love to watch him get beaten like a red-headed, morbidly obese stepchild again.

Breathlessly described by admirers as “the coolest ex-US vice-president ever”,

They do have a point, you know. Just look at the rather fascinating effect upon local climes whenever the Goreacle approaches. Maybe we could talk him into traveling to global wormening hot spots to alleviate the effect?

Gore has consistently stated he has no interest in launching a 2008 election bid, while stopping short of unequivocally ruling himself out.

He leaves that part to the voters. Nothing new there either.

“I haven’t ruled it out, but I don’t think it’s likely to happen,” Gore said in a recent interview with Time Magazine.

Yet Gore’s prominent involvement in events like Live Earth — which will see over 150 stars perform in eight concerts around the world to urge governments to set climate change targets — will inevitably breathe new life into calls for a 2008 White House bid.

Or seven. Or six. Well, maybe four. OK, dammit, TWO concerts. The penguins in Antarctica will be thrilled.

However, Sherry Bebitch Jeffe, a political scientist at the University of Southern California, said she doubted Gore would enter the running.

“I don’t think at this point he’s thinking about it,” Jeffe said. “He’s having so much fun where he is,” she added, referring to Gore’s new-found status as crusading environmental campaigner,

“Crusading” being the operative word here, although it’s doubtful that he’ll ever reach the Holy Land. Which is good. They wouldn’t much like the blizzards, we’re sure.

as evidenced in his involvement with the Oscar-winning documentary “An Inconvenient Truth.”

Which covered new ground in the “documentary” category by not being documented very well at all. Actually, it didn’t. Michael Moore, another well-known land whale with a quite tenuous grasp on reality beat him to it.

“His image problems have been waylaid by ‘An Inconvenient Truth’,” Jeffe said. “What you see in the film is what you get when you meet him — an Al Gore who is charming, witty and does have some personality.”

If you consider a pontificating, overweight, mumbling old codger in earth tones blabbing on about a slide show “charming, witty and having some personality”, in which case you’d positively love my old organic chemistry professor. I’d put you in touch with him if only I could remember his name, but that is yet another one of the things I don’t remember about him. That and everything past the first five minutes of any given one of his lectures, since that was the exact moment when the auditorium would erupt in snores.

Bruce Buchanan, a professor of government at the University of Texas, said the challenge for a Gore presidential campaign would be maintaining his new image.

Or, more importantly, maintaining vital signs among his audience past the first three slides.

“He feels freer to speak his mind now, no question,” Buchanan said.

Yes, but once he has unloaded that minuscule vessel, what is he supposed to do with the remaining 59 minutes of a one hour appearance?

“If he became a candidate I think he’d be wise to stay in that vein.

There’ll be a lot of people desperately searching for a vein in the audience, that’s for sure.

“He was over-managed and over-cautious before and never seemed entirely comfortable in his own skin.

And now there’s even less room inside of it than there were before.

That’s the difference between the Al Gore you see today and Al Gore the 2000 presidential candidate.”

80 lbs?

The question of Gore’s possible candidacy would remain open as long as he failed to decisively close the door on an election bid, analysts said.

“Gore can still enter the race as long as he hasn’t conclusively decided not to.”

Whatever would we do without analysts?

“I think the possibility does remain,” Buchanan said. “He’s not made a definitive statement. However he’s said he isn’t really that interested and I believe that.

“I believe it’s a possibility, but I don’t.”

Forget about teaching, professor, you’re clearly destined for D.C.

“On the other hand he won’t pull out completely and there is a sentiment in the party which is concerned about the electability of the two leading candidates.”

That would be the third hand, wouldn’t it professor? Heaven have mercy upon the poor youngsters attending your classes, thinking that they’re about to learn something.

The chances of Gore running may hinge on the fortunes of the two Democratic front-runners, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama.

“I think the one thing that would move him to consider is if Hillary falters,” said Jeffe. “If she begins to implode he might think about it.”

If she begins to implode, I’m headed for the Kennedy Space Center to hitch a ride, because an ego of that magnitude doing that is bound to create a singularity.

Winning the Nobel Peace Prize — Gore is among 181 nominees for the prestigious honor which is announced in October — may also persuade him to enter the running, Jeffe said.

“He can probably afford to delay any decision until after the Nobel is announced,” she said. “If it doesn’t, it doesn’t happen. But there may be some cachet in a Nobel Peace Prize winner running for president.”

Because nothing says “Presidential material” louder than a Nobel Prize. Just ask Jimmeh “Sturmer” Cahd’uh. Or Yasser Arafat, but he can’t run. Not only is he not a natural born citizen, he’s also, unlike Cahd’uh, very satisfyingly dead.

Come to think of it: If the Goreacle were to die, would that preclude him from running? Would anybody even notice?

Jeffe said becoming US president would also put Gore in the perfect position to positively influence the issue closest to his heart — climate change.

The issue closest to the Goreacle’s heart is — the Goreacle.

“I’ve never really bought this suggestion that Mr Gore can be more effective for the environment from outside the political sphere,” Jeffe told AFP.

Tell that to all of the poor sods freezing their bollocks off whenever he’s sighted in the neighborhood.

“If you want to impact the environment or tackle global warming, there is no better place from which to do it than the Oval office.”

We’re not so sure about that. He seems to be impacting the environment quite effectively from his Tennessee mansion. 20 times more effectively than the average energy consumer, to be exact.

Idiots.

64 Responses to “In the Presence of Greatness”
  1. L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter Comment by L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter

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    Winning the Nobel Peace Prize — Gore is among 181 nominees for the prestigious honor which is announced in October — may also persuade him to enter the running, Jeffe said.

    So is Rush Limbaugh.

  2. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    there is a sentiment in the party which is concerned about the electability of the two leading candidates.”

    And they think the Gorebicle is the answer? That he’s more electable?! Bwuhaha! Damn, they’re smokin’ some strong stuff.

  3. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    So is Rush Limbaugh.

    Rush for Peace baby!

  4. Unregistered Comment by tweell

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    We need him to come back to Phoenix. It was looking like a very hot spring until he showed up in April. The Gorecicle saved me a good chunk on my electric bill.
    He’s in London right now, thus the freak hailstorm. I finally understand why his gas and electric bill is so high - if he has such an effect just visiting, it has to be much worse at his home.

    “Governor, the heat wave is making the utilities impose rolling blackouts, and has people in the hospital. Can we declare a state of emergency?” “No, we need more than that.” Dials. “Mr. Gore, would you be available for a speech on global warming?”

  5. Naviguesser Comment by Naviguesser

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    Just up on DrudgeReport, a judge in Brazil suspended the Live Earth concert because there aren’t enough police tasked to secure the concert. Suck it, Al!

  6. Unregistered Comment by leoni2

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    Gee, anyone in the mood for a good laugh?

    Pakistani cleric captured under burqa

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070705/ap_on_re_as/pakistan_radical_mosque

  7. LC Beaker Comment by LC Beaker

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    80 lbs?

    There’s a reason why I put down my drink when I read the Rott. Classic.

  8. Xystus Comment by Xystus

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    Again: All hail (& sleet & snow) the Goracle!

  9. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    influence the issue closest to his heart

    More like his bank account.

    He was over-managed and over-cautious

    and over fed, over the edge, over and under…..

  10. Unregistered Comment by blacktygrrrr

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    Al Gore has bigger worries now. Besides, what was his son doing in Orange County to begin with? That would make as much sense as me going to a NOW meeting and asking them to cook me dinner.

    The reason why people live in Orange County and San Diego is to get away from the Al Gores of the world.

    eric

    P.S. Happy 4th, your doggliness.

  11. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    blacktygrrrr
    I don’t know what direction he was going, but maybe he was going 100 MPH to get OUT of Orange County.

    On the other hand, isn’t the coast full of rich people surfing, or am I stereotyping?

  12. The Major Comment by The Major

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    The Goracle’s son was BUSTED early Wednesday morning for doing 100+mph in a… Corvette? No… Maserati? No… ‘62 Falcon Pick-up? No… it was a TOYOTA PRIUS!!! I didn’t know a Prius would break 100mph! He must of had those hybrid gerbils on crystal meth. Junior also had pot, narcotics, and hypnotics in his possession.

    I’ll give the boy some credit, at least he is a lot less of a hypocrite than Al Senior. He’s a dedicated leftist doper, dabbling in assorted mind-altering drugs and drives a “green” car! His Dad, by comparison, is a just phony poser who exploits the gullibility of mentally fogged hippies, neo-hippies, and clueless moonbats.

  13. rightismight Comment by rightismight

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    I think that Al Bore III has inadvertantly uncovered the reason why some people still think his dad is so cool; ganja and mind-altering drugs.

  14. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    The Major
    I have an older and less vigorous Prius (with no bumperstickers), and I do 80 all the time. Never wanted to go higher and risk a ticket.

    What are hypnotics? Xanax and Valium are tranquilizers, and Aderall is for ADD.

    “exploits the gullibility of mentally fogged hippies, neo-hippies, and clueless moonbats.”
    —-This model has the support of the world’s leading climatologists and the National Academy of Sciences. (I have to check for sure, but I would think that the cycles of natural heating and cooling would be incorporated into the model.) Disagreement is part and parcel of science, but these people are not idiots.
    —-every theory gets questioned. It’s part of the process, and those that can’t survive get discarded.
    —-The “mentally fogged” comments are at least inaccurate for the scientists supporting this model–can’t speak for the general population. (Although I will admit to occasional mental fogginess, particularly at 3 AM.)
    —-this isn’t a talking point issue–I’m a scientist

    I guess I wouldn’t be disagreeing with you if you just went “This model sucks; Al Gore is evil,” but you are insulting everyone who might support it. And I’m a crabby old beast this time of the morning. And I have been called a moderate (really), so no testing to see if I taste like chicken!

  15. hOOt Gibson Comment by hOOt Gibson

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    The fat bastard can’t even control his and fat assed T(r)ipper’s out-of-control drug induced son, let alone the earth’s temperature.

    What a useless fuck he was and is.

    hOOt

  16. lc_corey Comment by lc_corey

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    Really, though, he should tell his son to slow down. The faster you drive, the less efficient your vehicle is at displacing useless emissions such as Carbon Dioxide.

  17. Unregistered Pingback by Inoperable Terran » Breathless drooling update

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    […] Gore is a rock star! No, really… Posted by Ian S. […]

  18. Unregistered Comment by LC TGregg

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    There’ll be a lot of people desperately searching for a vein in the audience, that’s for sure.

    LOL, that’s a well written line Emperor.

  19. Sir Christopher Comment by Sir Christopher

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    he was headed south, Psychochick, probably headed to a party at San Diego State University, or thereabouts. Great parties in S.D. The byline of the story was in Laguna Niguel which is a stunning stretch of beach. I’ve lived in CA all my life, and i never felt more comfortable and amongst friends than my cousin’s wedding in Newport Beach a few years ago. I sat with a Vietnam chopper pilot and spoke with him the whole time.

    Instead of being the only conservative in the room, the tables were turned.

    influence the issue closest to his heart

    More like his bank account.

    just like the Klinton’s, particularly Bill, who never fails to mention in speeches how rich he is now and how he doesn’t need tax cuts….blah blah blah

  20. Sir Christopher Comment by Sir Christopher

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    “I don’t expect to be a candidate again ever.”

    “I’ve kind of fallen out of love with politics,” Gore said. He said the best use of his experience is to bring awareness and a sense of urgency to the issue of climate change.

    Gore laughed when asked if he was ready to endorse a candidate for president. He said his evaluation would be based on what each decides to do about climate change.

    Al Gore III, the youngest of Gore’s four children, was previously arrested in 2003 for marijuana possession while a student at Harvard University. He completed substance abuse counseling as part of a program to settle the charge and now lives in Los Angeles where he is an associate publisher of GOOD, a philanthropy magazine aimed at young people.

  21. Unregistered Comment by associatecontributor

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    Breathlessly described by admirers as “the coolest ex-US vice-president ever”,

    I dunno Elbridge Gerry has always been tops in my book.

  22. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    he was headed south, Psychochick,

    He still is, Sir Chris, with a big-ass cinder block firmly lodged against the gas pedal.

    Poor kid. But, really, can you blame him? With a father like that???

  23. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    Well I do hate to alarm everyone here…especially Mope, but there seems to be a problem occurring with respects to our development of Ethanol.

  24. MegaTroopX Comment by MegaTroopX

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    To be fair, my folks have a hybrid (Pure economics. 42 mpg in $3/gallon territory). It performs equal to its non-hybrid equivalent, maybe a little better.

  25. Ten-Ten Comment by Ten-Ten

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    On the other hand, isn’t the coast full of rich people surfing, or am I stereotyping?

    PsychoChick, stereotypes are usually fact based.

    Plus they’re a whole lot of fun!

  26. Blackiswhite, Imperial Agent Provocateur Comment by Blackiswhite, Imperial Agent Provocateur

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    Damn, they’re smokin’ some strong stuff.

    Crunchie, I’m sorry to say that they come by it naturally. The drugs only act like alcohol in an asshole—it accentuates what is already there.

  27. The Major Comment by The Major

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    Yo Psychochick,

    1) Valium IS a hypnotic. All benzodiazepines are. They are also known as sedative-hypnotics.

    2) I own a 2007 Blue Prius as well, not because it is “Green,” but because the technology is freakin’ COOL (and gas in Hawaii is $3.50+ a gallon regular unleaded). I have never tried to get it above 70. Sort of defeats the purpose. Still, the thought of my “Electric Flea” being able to top a hundred is… well, invigorating! Time to sell my 2007 Corvette Z06!

    3) The man-caused global-warming model is correct because… what? The National Academy of Sciences and grant-grubbing climatologists have proclaimed it so? Need I remind you of the great scientific certainties of the past that were universally endorsed by leading scientists of the time and soundly proven wrong? Flat world, earth-centric view of the universe, tomatoes were poisonous, GLOBAL COOLING… There are countless others. The truth is that “Gaia” is a dynamic entity, with cycles that span months (seasons) to eons, eras, periods and epochs. There have been times when the earth has been much colder and much warmer than it is now. It is the utmost in arrogance to assume that man’s pollution, which pales in comparison to a healthy and quite natural Plinian volcanic eruption, is the culprit for the supposed warming. When politics and money pollute the equation, the scientific method suffers and the resulting outcomes suspect.

    4) No talking points - I, too, am a scientist.

    5) I am also generous: “This model sucks; Al Gore is evil.”

    6) Insulting? Perhaps. Those that refer to themselves as “scientists” who bastardize the scientific method to shape outcomes are worthy of much insult. The truth IS the truth no matter what political party or special interest group is insulted by it. I will gladly replace a current belief with unadulterated scientific TRUTH anytime. Only a fool would do otherwise. I am nowhere near convinced of the science behind the THEORY of human-induced global warming.

    In my nearly 50 years on this planet, I have watched science become increasingly political and politically correct. That seriously disturbs me. Painting a Great White Shark to make it look like a goldfish might make one feel safe, maybe even more appealing to the eye… until it bites your ass off. The opposite, painting a goldfish to look like a Great White is, at the very least, clueless catastrophizing. At worst, it is intentional intellectual terrorism.

    PS: It is a well known fact that Liberals do taste like chicken, best served with a full-bodied Chardonnay. Fava beans and a nice Chianti go best with their livers.

  28. sig94 Comment by sig94

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    I really, really hope Al Bore runs, errrrrrrr, lumbers for President next year.

    Only this time at the Democratic convention when he slides his tongue down Tipper’s throat, we’ll all be treated to the sight of ice cubes and sleet exploding out her ass as he freezes everything between her tits and her giblets.

  29. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    Psycochick:

    —-This model has the support of the world’s leading climatologists and the National Academy of Sciences. (I have to check for sure, but I would think that the cycles of natural heating and cooling would be incorporated into the model.) Disagreement is part and parcel of science, but these people are not idiots.

    It doesn’t count a science if you wait until the check clears before publishing the result. Always, ALWAYS, ALWAYS look to see who benefits.

  30. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    Only this time at the Democratic convention when he slides his tongue down Tipper’s throat, we’ll all be treated to the sight of ice cubes and sleet exploding out her ass as he freezes everything between her tits and her giblets.

    ROFLMAO! Sig shoots, he scores!

  31. sig94 Comment by sig94

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    AL “TASTIFREEZE” GORE

  32. sig94 Comment by sig94

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    I give up

    [Photobucket is “funny” that way. To use the “img” tag with those (and any other image, for that matter), right-click on the image itself and copy image location (or get it from “properties” if you’re using Internet Exploder) instead of using the URL on the address bar. — Emp. M.]

  33. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    He didn’t invent the internet - he invented the ICEE!

  34. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    It’s not too late to get JEB Bush into the race.

    Wouldn’t THAT frost his balls?

  35. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    The Major
    I’ll stop arguing with you about hypnotic–didn’t realize it was a synonym for sedative. Although I must say Xanax relieves anxiety and leaves you with a clear mind, so I don’t think it’s a typical sedative (unlike Valium).

    I did say that theories don’t always stand the test of time. I hope this one is wrong, actually. My comment was more that not everyone who believes it’s valid is a total idiot (including many in the scientific community who will derive no financial benefit from the theory). And as far as bastardizing the scientific method, there is a lot of data in papers that passed peer review. That doesn’t automatically mean the conclusions are correct, but it’s hardly a dog and pony show. I guess you would argue that the peers are biased.

    And I don’t think we are anywhere near a consensus for the TRUTH in climatology. It takes a number of years for things to be worked out and become the truth. If you’ve noticed, I keep referring to “the model” and “theory,” not to “truth.” Maybe other people aren’t so circumspect, and you certainly are not with “the truth IS the truth no matter what political party or special interest group is insulted by it.” It must be nice to be the purveyor of the truth.

    What’s your field? I’m curious, because I’m close to your age and haven’t noticed a PC politicization of science. If anything, I’ve noticed the other direction. All the microbial research funding going for WMD research (a valuable thing, unquestionably), but almost no research funds remaining for normal microbial research, for instance. However, I’m not saying you are wrong. I am just curious about your opinions. Except for stem cell research, most of the research I’m around is PC neutral. Maybe we should go private and not bore everybody: tetrodotoxin2 yahoo (if you want). Note: you are not allowed to hunt me down and harvest my liver! I forbid it.

    ” fava beans and a nice Chianti go best with their livers.”
    —-sounds strangely familiar :)

  36. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

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    psychochick

    My sister, who is currently doing recombinant DNA work with plants, has informed me of recent “political correctness” in that field. She used to do a lot of work with tobacco plants, (e.g. building in a salt tolerance, or resistance to herbicides), since (for whatever reason), they were easy to work with, and procedures procedures created on them were transferrable to other species with minimal adjustment. (From my understanding, the variety she was working with were one of the “white mice” of the plant world.)

    However, in the last few years, there have been complaints made about “working for companies that cause lung cancer” and so forth.

    Would you call this “politicization”?

    I would.

  37. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    Guido
    Thank you for reminding me of that situation. Tobacco has been an excellent model system for genetic engineering work, which then gets applied to other plants! I thought those complaints were really stupid and yes that is clearly politicization.

    I actually wasn’t arguing that there weren’t PC issues–I was just looking for examples.

    DUH! I forgot the main example: genetic engineering of food crops. When you breed a plant, you shuffle thousands of genes. With genetic engineering, you change one gene. It’s really much safer, depending on what you want the plant to do. Plants with built in insect resistance need fewer insecticides, which would generally be viewed as a good thing.

    There is a lot of vitamin A deficiency blindness in children in the third world, and scientists want to genetically engineer rice to make more vitamin A, so kids wouldn’t go blind. There’s a huge uproar about it!

  38. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Dear Major,

    ’…Flat world, earth-centric view of the universe…’

    I hate to nit pick here…

    Being a man of science, I thought I would correct a couple of “typo’s” you made if you do not mind…

    “Science” never claimed the earth was flat (only a handful of loonies). Christianity (Catholic Church FYI, not the same thing) never claimed the earth was flat (again, only a handful of loonies).
    This is like the American Christian Witch burning stories from Salem, Mass… Minimal research shows:
    a) This happened in “Britain” since America was 158.6 years later… and
    b) It was a lone lunatic MAYOR that was not a “Christian” but a cultist.

    There are only 9 semi-famous Al Gore Pseudo-Science types over a 900 year period that wrote books and made noise claiming flat-earth blah blah, but even people THEN knew they were nuts…

    The Greeks pegged the earth’s diameter within 1% of actual in 340 sumthin’ B.C. (sphere also) since at least 4003 b.c. Not only did they see a round, sphere of a moon every night, they witnessed the earth’s shadow on the moon from time to time. A nice fat spherical shadow at that…

    Everything you’ve “heard” about flat earth syndrome (Columbus, Spain, Catholics – not to be confused with CHRISTIANS, et al) is a product of Darwinism Propaganda. Don’t fall for the pseudo-science friend.

    ===================================================

    I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but, the earth just happens to be the exact center of the known universe.

    I am well aware of the “prove it pal” response this gets, so, without further ado…

    Feel free (to prove me wrong)
    I have over 9,000 Hubble pictures and a plethora of microwave data that says I am dead on (in the middle no less) on this.

    What You Got?

    And Major, I’ll pay good money for a bumper sticker (classy) that reads “Liberals… taste like CHICKEN” if you know where I can get one :)

    -Soldier

  39. hOOt Gibson Comment by hOOt Gibson

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    Psychochick=DJ Allyn in Drag.

    hOOt

  40. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    hOOT
    Hi. I was hoping to stay under your radar.

    He’s got more guts than I do. He posts on threads that scare me off.

  41. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    SIGA
    Since you are a man of science (snort), I have some info on your quest for a cannabilistic bumper sticker.

    This is more than you want, but I’m sure you could sell them. 250 for $40. You can have whatever you like printed.

    http://www.psprint.com/printing_products/custom_vinyl_stickers.asp

  42. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Miss Psycho,

    Dare I ask why you snorted?

  43. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Miss Psycho,

    Forgive my manners. Thank you for the link :)

  44. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    SIGA
    I thought you were being sarcastic and am terribly, terribly sorry if you were not.

  45. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Miss Psycho,

    I have this black t-shirt with big red letters that states…

    “TACT… for people not witty enough to be sarcastic”

    I wear it proudly.

    Humor, sarcasm and wit keep us sane in an insane world. But as far as science goes, I am afraid that I did waste spend the better part of 40,000 hours in the hard sciences.

    I have however moved on, and am now penning a thesis based in “sissy science” (Psychology, Sociology and Philosophy) reflecting back on my many years as a hard science atheist. Basically it is a refutation of Dr. Ed Wilsons thesis (Consilience: The Unity of Knowledge) he wrote while still teaching at Harvard.

    My last hard science research was dabbling in molecular biology just as Bob Cook was taking over the Human Genome project, the Nazi that he is… so I left.

    As for the possibility of my taking “offence” at your comments, fret not. My research in Sociology has confirmed my long-lasting suspicion that “being offended” is a tactic of “victimlogy”, a power play to silence ones opposition.

    I like to hear people type, thus, I am unoffendable.

  46. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    SIGA
    You’re such a tease. Can you say what your molecular biology research project was? Combining Soc, Psych, and Phil sounds pretty hardcore to me. Plus they require constant thought, as compared to pipetting into Eppendorf tubes over and over.

    It’s hard to interpret jokes and sarcasm over the internet if you don’t know the person. I was just joking about keeping an axe by the front door to weird out my friends and neighbors, but I got analyses about it as a self-defense strategy.

    This is pissing me off, and I’ll go look it up after I’m done. I associate Wilson with insects for some reason. Maybe it’s a different Wilson.

  47. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Psycho,

    I had a personal interest in why it was possible (but rare) for DNA polymerases to incorporate an incorrect base during replication. These mismatched bases are recognized by the polymerase immediately due to the lack of Watson-Crick base-pairing. The mismatched base is then removed by the 3′ ——> 5′ exonuclease activity and the correct base inserted prior to progression of replication.

    You see, Mendels Law has been broken, a few times to my knowledge, and I wanted to know why plants such an Arabidopsis thaliana eradicated copies of the hothead gene when both parents and grandparents passed this along. This run OPPOSITE to ALL of Evolutionary biology as even a remote possibility.

    Not that I care to criticize Austrian monks, but I knew the jig was up on evolution, and it was time to prove it, to myself anyway.

    That combination of study is a homogenous reality (Consilience if you will) if one is to understand the “human condition” for lack of a better term.

    I agree with Edwards core tenant of Consilience, but that is where the agreement ends. I did received a first-class vocabulary education during my research of his work, but, big words do not impress me, nor most people that seek truth.

    In the end, he is just a Myrmecologist (fucking ant farmer) disguised as an open minded academic, albeit his ridiculously high IQ. But never confuse knowledge with wisdom.

    Einstein did not make this mistake. Wilson is no Einstein.

    By the way, I bought that shirt at Hot Topic, go fucking figure….

    Goodnight

    -Soldier

  48. The Major Comment by The Major

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    Where do I start?

    1) Field - Medicine
    2) Love the “tetrodotoxin2″ email address! Froze me in my tracks!
    3) Liberals Taste Like Chicken - Original idea, only doesn’t everything taste like chicken? Except, of course, chicken. They taste like frog legs.
    4) Benzodiazepines have a wide variety of effects with anxiolysis being pretty much universal. Some, like midazolam and flunitrazepam (Rohypnol - date rape drug) have amnestic effects, others can be used as muscle relaxants. Xanax is a fairly mild hypnotic.
    5) Peer review… Works in medicine (most of the time). A published, peer-reviewed research article is scrutinized by thousands upon thousands of practicing and research-oriented physicians. If it is flawed, it is quickly pointed out as so. I have seen many such articles that should have never seen the light of day, yet they passed enough “peer review” to be published. What such “checks and balances” system exists for climatologists? The majority of climatologists (and exactly how many are there?) have signed off on the theory and appear to be actively silencing those who oppose it. With the assistance of powerful, non-scientist allies such as the Goracle simply proclaiming that human-caused global warming is “fact” creates a climate (pun intended) that buries opposing research results.
    6) I never claimed to be the “purveyor of truth.” My point was that the truth, whatever it ends up being, is the truth. Period. One can choose to believe whatever he/she wants, but truth spares no feelings and will gnaw your tookus off if you choose to ignore it by believing in partial truths, fantasies or damn lies.
    7) PC articles/research… Read a peer-reviewed article in a medical journal about the existence of guns posing a “health threat” to children. Hmmm… using that logic, I could publish an article that the existence of automobiles pose an even greater health threat to children since far more children are killed and injured in automobile accidents. Come to think of it, I could publish an article claiming that irresponsible gun owners pose a health threat to children. The article was a pure hit piece with no real purpose than to support a political view.
    8) Earth-centric view of the universe. Probably would have been better stated as “universe physically revolving around the earth.” I could argue that, prior to the 15th century, the “church” spoke for science as a whole by squelching opposing views. Is that any different (at least for this issue) than non-scientist Al Gore proclaiming that global warming is fact and that all opposing views are nonsensical? Ptolomy vs the ancient Greeks? With the help of the church, Ptolomy’s bogus view held fast for 1400 years. I concede the flat-earth theory was not a good example, though the pseudoscientific nut jobs did have their followers and influence, much like the Goracle.
    9) SIGA - the human known universe does indeed center on earth, but only from our observation point on earth. I could argue that the human known universe centers on the Hubble, or any other remote sensing space probe that can peer or sense farther than earth-based telescopes or sensors. Or perhaps the calculated center of the earth and all of our space probes. What about the gravitational center of the universe, or at least our particular dimension of it? Just some thoughts…

  49. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Dear Dr. Major Sir,

    Indeed a pleasure to make your aquaintance.

    2) I also like to watch people I do not particularly care for eat large quantities of puffer fish just for fun :)

    8) Between the 6th and 15th centuries, while Europe was basting in/clawing their way out of the dark ages, yes, the Catholic Church was the “government” in so many words. I agree totally that your connection of Ptolomy and Gore is well founded.

    9) Being that mathematics is my oldest and dearest friend, I could bore you with numbers that have no meaning. I shall instead just pound my fist on the desktop making both my rat and keyboard jump screaming “dammit, I know I am right!!!” :) :O

    By the way, everyone knows the gravitational center of the universe is Michael Moore (where did YOU go to school? sheesh)

  50. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    SIGA
    I would ask if you were being witty, but you have made it clear that you prefer to be known as sarcastic. Is the pufferfish comment a joke about people poisoning themselves? Or have you actually been in one of those restaurants where they remove the gland and serve the fish as a delicacy? (except when they screw up and the meal is fatal)

    You have a rat? Aren’t they wonderful pets? My husband developed an allergy to them, so no more rats.

    You have a really awesome historical knowledge of science (and so does The Major)

  51. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Dear Miss Psycho,

    The pufferfish comment is a dig at people that think they know something that others do not. “I can do those cuz I know what I am doing…” (yes, not removing the gland first)

    I believe it was Sir Jeffrey M. Foxworthy who said “What’s the last thing a redneck says before he dies?”… “Hey Y’all, watch this!”

    That and your email addy, of course…

    I hate to sound like the old coot Strother Martin from Cool Hand Luke in stating “What we have here, is a failure to communicate…”

    But we do

    Rat and keyboard refer to the thingy with a tail and a click button (or 2 or 3 if you are not Mac tolerant).

    Of course, if you are a wireless babe, the whole rat/mouse visual gets thrown out the window since without tail, life is utterly hopeless..

    I am sure it’s my fault, it is cryptic references that got me to this website in the first place…

    Thank you for your kind words, keep in mind, most of what I have stored in the dark recesses of my head is completely useless nonsense. Here is one you may have heard of… Abiogenesis…

    Life is short, go run naked in the street, really. 

  52. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    SIGA
    rat/mouse–I am just too literal sometimes–it’s a problem of mine. Although I have never thught of the mouse as a rat; it’s a logical extension.

    I thought more people might get the tetrodotoxin reference, since there is a connection to food. I wonder if aflatoxin has been taken. Honestly, I was rather shocked the name had been already taken (T).

    You probably know that the Borgias used to practice their poisoning technique by giving poisoned baskets of food to the poor.

  53. The Major Comment by The Major

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    Dear SIGA,

    The pleasure is all mine, sir!

    Mathematics and I are long-time adversaries. I submit that calculus nearly claimed my life!! Blood-stained and battered, I was never so happy to see the end of a final exam in all my life! I cannot hope to ever mathematically prove or disprove that the earth is or is not at the center of the known universe, but I can offer to you mathematical observations on human knowledge.

    At any given point in time, the sum total of human knowledge, though continually growing, is finite, as illustrated below:

    o———o

    Now, we have all said or heard the following: That is the dumbest damn thing I have ever seen!” only to be witness to a never-ending parade of acts that negate the previous observation on the “dumbest damn thing” ever seen. Human stupidity, therefore, can be illustrated this way:

    < --------->

    Now, I had completely forgotten about Michael Moore being the gravitational center of the universe. My bad! You can illustrate Moore’s place in the stupidity infinity this way:

    < -----(( O ))----->

    The O represents Michael Moore, the black hole at the center of the stupidity infinity. The (( )) represents Moore’s stupidity “event horizon” where no force of logic, reason or intelligence can possibly escape.

  54. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Though my lovely wife is of mixed decent, Spanish and Italian (Sicily), I was not aware of the Borgias/Aadams family connection till you mentioned it.

    I was thinking of Haiti and Voodoo where they were 1st class connoisseurs of TTX with all their stupid zombie cult fascinations…

    And then there is Samuel Jackson screaming about poisoning his brothers in a most memorable scene just before shooting those young guys for possessing the “briefcase” with the “light”.

    It is indeed a slow day at the Empire isn’t it? Is the Emperor vacationing on a white sandy beach somewhere nice?

  55. The Major Comment by The Major

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    Ooops! The upload I sent to the image server didn’t take! Here’s one last try:

    Al Gore is best illustrated this way:

    The Grand Ass

  56. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Major = FF (Fucking Funny)

    Nice lesson professor, I did indeed enjoy it <2 thumbs up>

  57. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    All,

    Well, I must go to bed. I have a big day tomorrow.

    Major

    I am sure it was just a Freudian slip the horse being Islamic Muslim Arabian…

    Had to be…

    And since we are posting pictures of the Goracle, I leave you with this…

    Numbers 22:27-29

    And when the ass saw the angel of the LORD, she fell down under Balaam: and Balaam’s anger was kindled, and he smote the ass with a staff.

    And the LORD opened the mouth of the ass, and she said unto Balaam, What have I done unto thee, that thou hast smitten me these three times?

    And Balaam said unto the ass, Because thou hast mocked me: I would there were a sword in mine hand, for now would I kill thee.

    Good thing for Big Al, I left all my swords in Los Angeles…

  58. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

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    psychochick

    There is a lot of vitamin A deficiency blindness in children in the third world, and scientists want to genetically engineer rice to make more vitamin A, so kids wouldn’t go blind. There’s a huge uproar about it!

    Yeah, I have been tracking that sort of thing. You can imagine what my sister’s reaction is to it.
    (Anything involving aluminum baseball bats and deadblow hammers applied to selected body parts is getting close…)

  59. WayneB Comment by WayneB

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    SIGA - I know you said you were going to bed, but perhaps you’ll return to this thread tomorrow:

    Don’t forget that mahematically speaking, if you subscribe to the notion that space is curved in the fourth dimension, and if the Universe is a closed one, then the center of the Universe may not contained be within observable space (even after accounting for Michael Moore). However, since all of expanding space appears to be retreating from you, you appear to be the center point, no matter where you are located (surface of the balloon and all that).

    Now, I believe that if you were able to find 4 points far enough apart, and measure their distances from each other accurately, then you could show whether or not space was wrapped around a 4D shape, but I don’t know if other factors in space would come together to thwart that or not.

  60. The Major Comment by The Major

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    I thought there were 11 dimensions? Comprised of 2.5 Fifth Dimensions, I believe. Who would have thunk it? Rhythm & Blues/Soul/Fundamental Physics…

  61. SoldierInGodsArmy Comment by SoldierInGodsArmy

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    Good morning Wayne,

    I used to think like that. And at more than one point in time, I would have wholeheartedly agreed that this was a reasonable assertion to make. I have however, had a change of heart.

    It is kind of like a good Asminov story, where the coolest shit really does happen, and the universe proves to behold complex comprehensible mathematical truths that us mere mortals can wrap our brain around.

    I am firm in the saddle on the Einsteinian horse. I believe that the universe is homogeneous and isotropic. 3 spatial and 1 temporal is all the dimensions that fit in my head. With that said, using E3 geometry, I conclude as I mentioned, that the Earth is at the exact center of the universe.

    If one is to venture into the deep dark waters of Global Geometery and Superstring Theory, you find sharks everywhere you turn. This holds the most truth when clowns start changing known observable physics into Fantasy Physics™, for example, claiming the speed of light is not constant when it clearly the fuck is, or better yet, the nutjobs that have transformed institutions like MIT from “respectable frontiers of science” to something that resemble the inside of a chimpanzee exhibit with mathematical shit being thrown into fast rotating metal blades.

    Prime example, π (Pi if the font fails in here)

    Whether you prefer E3 H3 or S3 creamer in your geometrical coffee, π is π and throwing your feces at your keepers will not change that.

    If you measure the circumferences of circles of steadily larger diameters and divide the former by the latter, all three geometries give the value π for small enough diameters but claiming the ratio departs from π for larger diameters ( H3 or S3 ) and claiming that Ω does not equal 1 is just retarded.

    Look, Ω = 1. Otherwise, I would have to believe that π is going to change at some point. The problem with the expanding balloon theory ( Ω > 1 ) is that it predicts that due to a great circle on a sphere π is reduced to a circumference only twice its diameter (π = 2 ) How retarded liberal does one have to be to believe Pi can equal 2?

    Or

    We drift off into superstring theorems that kill all your remaining brain cells (the ones that pot, and LSD did not already claim) arguing about how many dimensions exist in the space-time continuum.

    Then

    We end up with nonsense such as Modal Realism that produces Level IV Multiverse solutions that simply propose that all things math equal all things in reality, ie; Mathematical universe hypothesis (back to the retards at MIT, sorry). How lost can one be?

    At this point, it is safe to say a person that seriously ponders this shit, does not get laid often, if ever.

    Thus the moral of the story is, the Earth is the exact center of the Universe, and sex is great.

    I apologize, but having to think like this before my first cup of coffee is finished makes me, um, testy.

    Have a great weekend, my sorry ass has to “work” 

  62. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    If you measure the circumferences of circles of steadily larger diameters and divide the former by the latter, all three geometries give the value π for small enough diameters but claiming the ratio departs from π for larger diameters ( H3 or S3 ) and claiming that Ω does not equal 1 is just retarded.

    Look, Ω = 1. Otherwise, I would have to believe that π is going to change at some point. The problem with the expanding balloon theory ( Ω > 1 ) is that it predicts that due to a great circle on a sphere π is reduced to a circumference only twice its diameter (π = 2 ) How retarded liberal does one have to be to believe Pi can equal 2?

    Damn…and here I was feeling good to know I could shoot straight, use PSP 8 and 3DS Max, defrag my own computer, crochet, and make a kick ass pot roast.

    *shuffles off to get her Dunce Hat*

  63. Sir Christopher Comment by Sir Christopher

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Which Island, Major, my wife is from Hilo?

  64. The Major Comment by The Major

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    63. Comment by Sir Christopher

    Which Island, Major, my wife is from Hilo?

    Oahu, but not for long. I’m a movin’ to thuh Great Southwest, where men are men, sheep are nervous, and spacetime really does have just 4 dimensions. Well, five if you count great barbecue.

    I will miss the incredible seafood here in the People’s Socialist Republic of Hawaii. Had a wonderful Ono/Swordfish combo plate last night at Duke’s Grill in Waikiki. In a couple of weeks, fresh fish will mean farm-raised catfish. A small sacrifice, really. I’ve lived here for several years and I’m ready to return to my old redneck ways of huntin’, shootin’ and raisin’ hell. Stretch out a little… you know, like drive more than 20 miles in any given direction without a blue water roadblock.

    By the way, I LOVE the Big Island! Plenty of open space there. I’ve hiked to the base of the actively erupting Pu`u` O`o`cinder cone on Kilauea four times. No small feat negotiating 8.5 miles of volcanic deserts and thick jungle - one way. The experience, however, is well worth the suffering! I could easily see myself living on the Big Island, if it weren’t for the outrageous cost of living and the commie State gubmint.