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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » To YouTube Or Not To YouTube
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His Imperial Majesty is well aware of the ongoing raging debate about whether or not the Republican candidates should appear for a re-run of CNN’s newly patented “let’s ask the candidates a bunch of questions made mainly by loony nutroots with an IQ slightly below rutabaga” format. It looks like the GOP hopefuls are bowing out, and the resulting debate among political junkies (of which His Majesty is one when he’s not busy oppressing brown-skinned people and planning punitive expeditions to the far reaches of space) has been — interesting.

Depending on how you define interesting, of course.

Obviously, His Rottieness has the perfect and ultimate answer to the question, as is always the case. We wouldn’t be Emperor if it were otherwise, and it seems so obvious that we’ve refrained from providing the masses with it, hoping against hope that they’d eventually come around to the only way of seeing things on an issue that is an absolute no-brainer.

But seeing as how the debate is still ongoing, we’ve finally decided that enough’s enough, so here’s the answer. You may now stop debating amongst yourselves, because the truth hath been spoken and the debate is over:

Of COURSE they should participate. Why not? Because the questions are all going to be industrial grade nutrooty insanity? As opposed to what, people? This is CNN we’re talking about, after all, and it’s not like any of those clowns have had a thought in the last decade or two that wasn’t helpfully printed out for them in 36pt, boldface, scarlet red Arial on a fax straight from the DNC. With illustrations.

The only difference is that, for once, the retarded questions will be coming straight from the fever swamps of Marxist delusions as opposed to being read aloud by a numbskulled drone with perfect hair and a pay grade three orders of magnitude above any actual qualifications that he might, at some point in his life, have aspired to. Hey, anything that shuts those airheads up, even if it is only for a few precious minutes, is one of G-d’s many gifts to man.

On the other hand, if they DON’T participate they’ll be forever branded as a bunch of sniveling nitwits afraid to make fun of mentally disabled people in public, something that should be a mandatory civic duty if you ask us, but we digress sadistically… Afraid of the nutroots? Are you sure that’s a label you’d like to carry around until November ‘08, GOP candidates? Because if it is, then we can only say that our expectations about you bland, equivocating, droning panel of nobodies have been fully justified. You can’t find it in yourselves to offer a chuckle and roll your eyes as a response to some of the most pathologically daft individuals in the Empire airing their insane conspiracy theories, yet you want us to believe that you can stare down, say, Mahmoud Ahmadinnerjacket?

Right. Release the tigers and bring on the next candidate, if you please.

So here’s the quick and dirty analysis from the Smartest Individual in the Universe, The Defender of the Clue and Wielder of the ClueHammer of Doom, His Majesty Misha I:

If you do participate, you’ll be faced with retarded questions bearing no resemblance to reality. In other words, no difference whatsoever from a standard CNN sponsored “debate.”

If you don’t participate, you’ll not only come off as nadless cowards, you’ll be sending an open invite to every tough guy and gal in the universe to come give you a wedgie and watch you cry.

Simple enough for you, or do we have to drag out the A/V aids?

Should the format be changed to make it at least slightly less idiotic? Why, what a splendid idea, and there have been a few suggestions, the only one of which worth considering comes from LC & IB Patterico:

I have an idea of my own. Do the debate, and then set up a new round for each party under these rules:

Each set of candidates answers questions picked by the candidates for the other party.

Democrats pick questions for Republicans, and vice versa.

The potential for interesting questions is limitless.

Brilliantly simple, eminently workable and, on top of everything else, the entertainment potential is positively enormous! Which, when you think about it, might actually make those clown shows worth tuning in to in the first place.

Serious? Worthy of our political system?

Frankly, our political system isn’t worthy of appearing in a whorehouse vaudeville act, so spare us that bit and, as far as “serious” goes, we repeat:

As opposed to what, exactly?

At least we’d get to laugh at the moronic convergence that we refer to as “election politics” in this country which, at least to some extent, would alleviate the pain when one of the worthless empty suits ends up in the White House and proceeds to forget every single promise he ever made while screwing us over royally.

Works for us.

16 Responses to “To YouTube Or Not To YouTube”
  1. DJ Allyn,  ITW Comment by DJ Allyn, ITW

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    What is stopping YOU from asking a YouTube question? Isn’t there some pressing question you’d like to roast the nuts of a presidential candidate with?

  2. WayneB Comment by WayneB

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    What is stopping YOU from asking a YouTube question?

    Um, because CNN is picking which questions they will actually be presenting? There are lots more enjoyable ways to waste time than making a video that will barely be looked at before being sent to oblivion.

    Now, if we could get a hookup like Misha quoted from Patterico, on the other hand…

  3. ScottG Comment by ScottG

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    I would prefer that the candidates not entangle themselves in nutroots, but if they do decide to wade in they must utterly destroy anyone who asks a foolish, demeaning, or baiting speech masquerading as a question.

    After a lecture by either a Truther, a Paulite, or a Mooreon, or Pinko, the candidate should say “that’s a completely ridiculous assertion (question) and I refuse to respond to such drivel.”

    Don’t think it’ll happen though….

  4. Spartan24 Comment by Spartan24

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    I would pay to see some of what the idiots would come up with to ask Republican candidates. Pretty scary stuff.

  5. Unregistered Comment by Eric35

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    CNN was way too easy on the Demi-wits with their selection of questions. The only right winger you-tuber was dismissed as a nut case when he refered to his rifle as a baby…I can imagine what they will do with the repubs…

  6. LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR Comment by LC JackBoot IC/A-OBR

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    Brilliantly simple, eminently workable and, on top of everything else, the entertainment potential is positively enormous!

    Well, I see an opportunity for enriching the Empire’s coffers immensely with such entertainment. Let’s make a move for Pay-Per-View rights.

  7. jaybear Comment by jaybear

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    What is stopping YOU from asking a YouTube question? Isn’t there some pressing question you’d like to roast the nuts of a presidential candidate with?

    well….because our questions about the porous border and fighting to win in Iraq and energy independence and supporting our troops would never make it on the air. It’s a CNN debate Dave, our questions would be issue oriented…not designed to slam the GOP candidates, hence they would be of no use to CNN.

    look at some of the questions asked during the first GOP debate. “Would you hire Karl Rove in your administration?” What do you dislike most about America?” “Is Karl Rove your friend?” “Would it be good for America to have Bill Clinton living in the White House again?”…….Now, have a giant snowman ask the question and you can see how ridiculous this would be.

    This will not be a straight debate, it will be a kangaroo court intended to discredit the Republicans and further smooth the road to the White House for the newly feminine shrillery. If I were a GOP candidate, I’d insist on the same rules that the demorats had….pre-screen the questions, approve of them, and have the answers scripted in advance…..all designed to dupe the useful idiots they call voters into thinking they matter in this whole process.

  8. Vergeltung Comment by Vergeltung

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    the whole debate format, as it stands now, is ridiculous. 30-second sound bite answers, dumb questions slanted by liberal moonbats. it’s just garbage in its present form.

    I think Cuomo (Mario) and Newt actually put together a few cogent paragraphs suggesting a complete do-over of the debate format, such as to actually encourage the discussion of ideas and SOLUTIONS to problems we all face. Jeebus, what a concept! :em69:

  9. maxxdog Comment by maxxdog

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    Any Repubs that don’t show up are no longer on my list to be considered. Won’t vote for a known chickenshit!

  10. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    What is stopping YOU from asking a YouTube question? Isn’t there some pressing question you’d like to roast the nuts of a presidential candidate with?

    If there were a snowball’s chance in Hell of them getting through, perhaps.

    Then again, with the kind of questions I’d like to ask the RINO fuckwits, even a panel of CNN liberal screeners might approve :em12:

  11. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    I have no intentions of wasting my time watching those retarded You Tube Debates. It’s a complete waste of time and it’s sole purpose is to give the Kos Kids something to watch before it’s time to change their diapers and put them to bed.

    I have already made up my mind who I am voting for, and that’s that. The rest of the pack can just go chase a Merry-Go-Round horse.

  12. maxxdog Comment by maxxdog

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    I’m with his Imperial All-Knowing Sithiness here. If you ain’t got the balls to deal with the Kos Kool-Aid drinkers you ain’t getting my vote. Doesn’t matter who you are, where you were on 9-11 or even if people spell your name with an exclamation point at the end of it!!!

  13. Unregistered Comment by LC Elchonon, Imperial Chief of Civil Disobedience

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    Any comments on fred’s hiring of spencer abrahams? i’m very upset at this.. he then backtracked..

  14. LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech Comment by LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    What is stopping YOU from asking a YouTube question? Isn’t there some pressing question you’d like to roast the nuts of a presidential candidate with?

    Forget it, just forget it. No way they’ll touch mine.

    “What kind of exit plans did the permanent residents of Arlington march off to war with?”

    No point in asking anyone for specifics of any freakin’ kind.

    What’s the point of even asking any this crap anyway? I don’t owe their channel ratings any favors.

    The fact is, we already know much more about them than they want us to.
    Anyone who’s relying on things heard in speeches, likes today’s posturing is at this point, very lost anyhoo.

    There’s plenty of recorded history on all the candidates, their votes,speeches,actions,contradictions,arrests,, to make astute decisions about each them already.

    Everydangthing that come’s out of their yaps these days on the tubes is just pap. Useless in determining what their real goals, real capabilities, intentions are.
    That stuff has been up on the big screen every day for years, today’s stump speech contradictions of what went before don’t mean nuthin’.
    But I do sooo enjoy the screamin’.

    Well, that’s the way Americans like it:
    SELL me that bitch, ‘can’t be bothered with tedious research, a couple of snappy sappy slogan’s will do just fine…

    Warning,,cheap meta-fer alert;

    Some folks want a car tricked out with certain colors/styles. Some folks want to know how well it works and holds up.

    I can figure all that much of it out myself,, just tell me how much gas is left in it.

    barack obama needs to grow some sideburns.

  15. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

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    To the republicans…”Why haven’t you sealed the border? What business interests are you protecting? For the demos…”Why do your portray yourself as supporting the troops yet stab them in the back at everr opportunity?”

  16. franksalterego Comment by franksalterego

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    Some days, Misha, you really do, make life worth living.

    :em99: