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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Keep Off The Grass!
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You are viewing the Archives for 2007.......If you want the current page, CLICK HERE.......

Thanks to Sir Christopher, we learn that the bean sprouts of New Zealand have discovered the Greek classics. Or, at the very least, one Greek classic:

A new phenomenon in New Zealand is taking the idea of you are what you eat to the extreme.

Vegansexuals are people who do not eat any meat or animal products, and who choose not to be sexually intimate with non-vegan partners whose bodies, they say, are made up of dead animals.

So much for our life-long fantasy of being vigorously abused by a bony vegan of indeterminate secondary sexual characteristics. (In case you clicked on the link above, the Imperial Department of Xenobiology informs us that they have a 79% confidence that the specimen on the left is the female of the two in the picture. Then again, they do have access to some seriously high tech equipment and the largest database in the known universe).

The co-director of the New Zealand Centre for Human and Animal Studies at Canterbury University, Annie Potts, said she coined the term after doing research on the lives of “cruelty-free consumers”.

Personally, we can’t think of anything more cruel than constantly being a pain in the arse when eating out, forcing everybody else to choose between either eating at the “Tofu Turducken” or listening to a stick insect whine, piss and moan for the entire meal about how there’s never anything on the menu for a poor vegan to eat. Here, eat one of the potted plants, you freak.

Actually, the sadistic pleasure they take in ruining everybody else’s perfectly good time with their endless sermonizing, histrionics and general lack of congeniality is one of the few things that His Majesty finds endearing about vegans but, then again, we are a sadist.

Where were we? Oh yes, “vegansexuals”, defined by the old Imperial Encyclopedia Galactica as “somebody who likes to have wild, reckless sex with cacti.” We guess we’ll have to submit an update for that entry now.

Cruelty-Free Consumption in New Zealand: A National Report on the Perspectives and Experiences of Vegetarians and other Ethical Consumers asked 157 people nationwide about everything from battery chickens to sexual preferences.

Sex with battery-operated chickens? So, tell us, which planet is this “New Zealand” on anyways? We may have to set up a planetary quarantine.

Many female respondents described being attracted to people who ate meat, but said they did not want to have sex with meat-eaters because their bodies were made up of animal carcasses.

Quick, who’ll be the first to inform those cerebrally deficient life forms that their entire bodies are, in fact, “animal carcasses?” More importantly, who’ll be the first to record the slackjawed expression on their faces and the vacant gaze from their eyes? Now there’s something we don’t want to miss.

“It’s a whole new thing – I have not come across it before,” said Potts.

And, if it weren’t for you, nobody else would’ve either. We’ll have to think up a suitable — reward for that.

One vegan respondent from Christchurch said: “I believe we are what we consume, so I really struggle with bodily fluids, especially sexually.”

Alright already… That is quite enough! Hellooooo lunch! And that was the best damn baby seal filet that we’d had in weeks too!

We’ll just stick with Lysistrate, thank you very much.

102 Responses to “Keep Off The Grass!”
  1. kwongdzu Comment by kwongdzu

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    I have a bag of fertilizer in the garage that says it contains fish bits. I’m pretty sure fish are animals, so I am feeding my plants animal products. If a vegetarian consumes a plant which consumed an animal, does that make the vegetarian a carnivore once removed? What about that steer manure the organic ones throw on the compost pile. Moo poo is the by product of an animal, isn’t it? No matter what, it’s all BS.

  2. Unregistered Comment by fanbladesaresharp

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    “One vegan respondent from Christchurch said: “I believe we are what we consume, so I really struggle with bodily fluids, especially sexually.”

    Maybe you should remove that carrot from your ass buddy. Seriously, there’s enough people that claim they can never get a date or laid, these freaks go out of their way to keep it that way.

    I wonder if anyone will lie to them in order to get into their pants?….hmm……

  3. Unregistered Comment by Lord Daealdric

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    I wonder if anyone will lie to them in order to get into their pants?….hmm……

    When I first read that, I thought you said “get into their pLants”. Interestingly enough, that may actually make more sense, at least for these people.

  4. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    Hey now, don’t you be using logic on the poor retards, kwong.

    Next, you’ll be explaining the basics of the digestive system to them and, before you know it, you’ll be telling them that we don’t absorb cells but rather components of cells through it.

    Are you listening, vegan freaks? Here goes:

    Amino acids, for instance. Some of which we call “essential” because they are, well, essential, in the sense that we cannot synthesize them ourselves so we have to get them from our diet. Take tryptophan, for instance.

    Here’s an image of tryptophan from a turkey:

    Here’s an image of tryptophan from a banana:

    Look familiar? Why, that’s because they’re the same fucking thing, you hideously daft “vegansexual” abominations.

    You may proceed to let your heads explode at your convenience.

  5. Unregistered Comment by fanbladesaresharp

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    Begs another question, do they apply Miracle-Gro before sex instead of a little purple pill?

  6. Unregistered Comment by anomdragon

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    I have a question, how do they handle oral sex? Do they not do that as it involves eating meat? Sorry about that ladies, just my mind wandering in the gutter.

  7. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    choose not to be sexually intimate with non-vegan partners whose bodies, they say, are made up of dead animals.

    And Vegans are made up of dead mulch. And smell like it too.

    Do horny Vegans ever beat their meat? :em99:

    :em99:

  8. kwongdzu Comment by kwongdzu

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    Mrs. M: Yes, but I think they use “jerkin the gherkin” instead.

  9. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    Christ on a popsicle stick. Doesn’t surprise me, but I really hope these ignorami just fuckoff and die out soon.

    Politics do not dictate to biology, end of story. We have those pointy teeth for ripping flesh, end of story. We need animal products (not necessarily meat, but animal aminos to survive. These folks are ignorant and ridiculous, like people who think organic means ‘fertilized with hippy-shit’, not ‘containing a carbon atom’.

    Reminds me of a bi friend I had a few years back. I was ranting about a political dyke at school, and how odious she was (really, really offensively militant, face like a toad, liked to piss people off so she could rant about their intolerance and homophobia), and my friend said:

    ‘oh yeah, I dated her about 10 years ago. It’s when I was more dykey and trying not to be lookist.’

    Lookist. Vegansexual. Ridiculous. The biological imperative wins, regardless- at least on the macro if not micro scale.

    Let’s just hope that Darwin gets his revenge on such sickly, unnatural beasts. Survival of the fittest and all that, and frankly, how fit can you be living on plants only?

    Now I need a steak.

  10. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    Misha
    The banana never went wandering the earth like an animal. Of course, we are going to have a lot of the same chemicals as plants–we do many of the same processes, except that plants do all sorts of extra cool things. I think bananas have an exceptional amount of tryptophan; it’s interesting that you picked them, unless it was mentioned in an article on tryp.

    Actually, when people are having trouble going to sleep and heat milk, I think it’s to release tryp. Maybe they should just eat bananas? Personally, I prefer tranquilizers.

    Vegans have substantially lower cancer rates that people who eat meat

    I will have to run that by my vegan friend–she will probably find it hilarious.

    I did get asked one time to please stop saying “Please pass the dead animal” at dinner parties (I still ate meat then and still eat fish). I just quiety eat veggies, salad, and rolls at dinner parties. I don’t loudly complain that I would love to eat the meatballs. (if you’re diabetic, your heart attack risk is lowered 50% by not eating red meat)

  11. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    Let me repeat:
    —Vegans have substantially lower cancer rates that people who eat meat

    The vegans that I know go mountain climbing! These are not frail people.

    What is really, really bad is to be vegan when you are pregnant. When it’s born, your baby will die in a few months if you feed it a vegan diet. That just happpened a few months ago. They were feeding it soy milk.

  12. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    And please don’t get pedantic on me about organic chem- I’m aware of the niceties of definition I ignored, but my definition is still more accurate than a hippy one, yes?

  13. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    I’m sorry. i definitely didn’t mean to be pedantic on you. Your definition of organic is precise. I don’t see how it’s an issue, though. You were saying they were sickly; I was saying the ones I knew climbed mountains (which worries me). The baby thing has no relevance to anything you said, and you didn’t say anything about cancer rates. I honestly can’t figure out where I was offensive, but I didn’t mean to be.

  14. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    PC, vegans kill babies all the time- and to remain healthy, they require synthetic supplements.

    I’m all in favor of vegetarian diets in the classic sense- ovo/lacto - if I could eat good Indian food for the rest of my natural, or even Chinese Buddhist temple food.

    But veganism is profoundly unnatural, and requires far more synthetic additive than any other diet, including the McDonald’s Diet!

    (OK, I concede to hyperbole in that, but it’s close- I’ve never known a vegan who doesn’t take megadoses of supplements to stay healthy, and they’re all thin, pasty and weak- generally prone to ‘environmental intolerances’, too- but I’m not sure how much of that is fashion and affectation)

  15. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    advice on the SPAM thread
    —before I crash and/or freak out, could someone computer-minded answer a couple questions on the SPAM thread?

  16. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    PC that was a prophylactic pedantry comment- you hadn’t commented when I started it, I just wanted to head off any objections to the definition.

    Your cancer comments are fair enough, but I’d like to get into the sample sizes and demographics- there are populations with ridiculously high life expectancies and low cancer rates that do eat flesh (traditional Japanese diets, Sicilian grandmothers, and the central Asian lot who live to absurd ages on a diet of barbecued mutton and yoghurt.)

    If you’re discussing a Western diet, then I’d argue that vegetarians eat more healthy in general than the bulk of the population, which will skew the sample.

  17. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    I didn’t know vegan baby death was that common. I knew of people putting their babies on a low-fat diet, which is just utterly depressing.

    I’ll ask my friend how many supplements she takes. She looks very healthy and is very strong. She says she doesn’t feel deprived. I’ve mostly managed to do without meat, but to do without dairy and egg would be intolerable.

    I’ll have to tease her about her husband being an animal carcass.

  18. Unregistered Comment by DukeFenton

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    Aren’t sheep and goats technically vegan? Now we know what Osama’s excuse is.

  19. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    I remember a few similar cases, leading to death or removal of the child due to extreme malnutrition.

    It’s again politics versus biology- veganism is biologically unnatural, and if you impose it on a growing child, the child will suffer.

    Just as an overview:

    google

  20. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    Read this

    link

  21. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    From the article:

    The fact remains, though, that humans prefer animal proteins and fats to cereals and tubers, because they contain all the essential amino acids needed for life in the right ratio. This is not true of plant proteins, which are inferior in quantity and quality — even soy.

    A vegan diet may lack vitamin B12, found only in animal foods; usable vitamins A and D, found in meat, fish, eggs and butter; and necessary minerals like calcium and zinc. When babies are deprived of all these nutrients, they will suffer from retarded growth, rickets and nerve damage.

  22. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    I swear I’m going to fly to China, track you down, and kick your ass! I was all stressed out about offending you, and it hadn’t happened! i don’t remember enough of the vegan to study to remember details. I think it was vegan and not vegetarian, but there can’t be that many vegans in the US.

    Actually, I do remember a summary of 6 studies–death rates of

    0.8 for fish eaters
    0.82 for vegetarians and occasional meat eaters
    1.0 for carnivores

    I’m super high risk for heart attack, though, so cutting out meat is a good idea. I’ll swear he does it on purpose. Whenever my husband makes a pasta or rice dish, he puts a can of ham in it. Bastard.

    You seem like you would be knowledgable about these things. Could you go to the SPAM thread and answer my questions, and I will be very grateful and not hunt you down? Actually, I would be super grateful and do any sort of favor for you I could.

  23. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    The comments are a doozie, too- a bunch of vegans with their knickers in a twist.

    Simple fact. Supplements are not natural. They are a stop-gap to cover the deficiencies in the diet. There are no, and never have been to my knowledge, and human populations with a traditional diet that excluded all animal products.

    Even Jains eat milk and cheese.

  24. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    I read the article when it came out! It’s the one I was referring to.

  25. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    I’ve lived in India and now in China, where many people are vegetarian. I have respect for that, and I acknowledge that it can be very healthy.

    However, most of the vegan platform is political in nature- and when they say ignorant platitudes like ‘milk is just for baby cows and it’s unnatural for us’, I question their worldview.

    Cows were bred by humans. We have evolved a relationship over tens of thousands of years. There’s a fair argument that we as a specie were pastoralists before we developed agriculture (probably simultaneous development in different places depending on environment if you ask me, but I’m sure you see what I’m getting at)

    Veganism is simply artificial, unnatural, and in my opinion, either unhealthy or extremely dependent on supplements.

    Ask a vegan where they get their calcium from. If they say broccoli or other dark green leafy veg, they are a. lying, or b. osteoporotic.

    Nobody can eat that much broccoli, they require supplements.

    (dead shellfish supplements! oh my)

    You haven’t answered my statements about vegetarianism, health, and sample demographics. I’m interested to know.

  26. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    Is there anything I can do for you? (within limits, of course!) Do you need anything mailed from the States?

  27. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    I see you found my answer…. no, thanks, I’m pretty well sorted here.

    I’m interested in the demographic detail, though- because generally vegetarians are more dietarily mindful, and thus more healthy. I’ll have more respect for those stats if they stand in a traditional healthy diet culture, like Japan, or any of the other long-lived low cancer low heart disease cultures that do eat meat.

    I kind of doubt it will.

    But the current Western diet is a nasty, unhealthy thing itself… only marginally more natural than veganism. Everything processed to death and full of crap additives.

  28. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    I’m sorry. I thought comment 22 addressed most of them. Death rates for veg vs carnivore. I said I didn’t know what the sample size was for the vegan study, but there can’t be that many of them in the US. can’t find the original article–it’s buried in a pile. I couldn’t find anything on the web that looked that reliable for vegan cancer rates.

    It looks like vegetarians have much lower cancer rates.

    I don’t feel anywhere near as strongly about veganism as you do. The ones that you know must be really annoying. Off the cuff, it seems like an unhealthy diet. However, there are people that argue that dairy is an unnatural dietary choice, since man was not eating dairy for much of our evolutionary history. I think there is a reason for lactose intolerance. Theory or not, I am going to go drink some milk.

    Now I’m quite curious, but too tired to pursue it. Before we domesticated cows, we must have been getting our calcium from some source. Did they grind up bones? I wish I remembered that talk on the evolution of humans better. It was millions of years before tools were used, so there was a very long period with no dairy. This has become an intellectual curiousity for me, not a debate on the merits of veganism. I don’t want to keep you waiting for an answer, but I may look into this a little.

    The dog is losing patience and requires a walk. If I find anything relevant, I’ll post back.

  29. jmaimarc Comment by jmaimarc

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  30. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    I’m more interested in the sample demographics- no worries about not finding them, it’s just an illustration of how statistics are evil and easily manipulated.

    Without sample and demographic info, the numbers are meaningless at best or misleading at worst.

    As for calcium, fishbones are a good source, easily accessible and digestible- and there are more sources, too. Calcium just isn’t one of those terribly plant-y minerals….

    The Chinese (genetically predisposed to lactose intolerance and geographically unsuited to growing cows- take your pick which is the root cause) cook most of their fowl so that the bones are easily eaten. Most of their calcium comes from eating chicken and fish with the bones in, and through the calcium salts used in curdling tofu.

    still, they traditionally only got 40% of their RDI, leading to generally short people and a lot of dowager’s hump.

    Now, as diets improve, average height is shooting up- though with the KFC McD’s thing, childhood obesity is shooting up, too.

    Too much of a good think makes anyone unhealthy.

  31. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    jmaimarc
    These are wonderful! really loved the longer piece with the potato (my living hell, since I despise them)

  32. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    In case you clicked on the link above, the Imperial Department of Xenobiology informs us that they have a 79% confidence that the specimen on the left is the female of the two in the picture.

    Why do I have this strange idea that either of those two would be . . er . . how do I put this . . “Off the menu” as it were?

  33. Unregistered Comment by mindy1

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    I have seen vegetarians who seemed healthy, and some who seemed so weak you could push them over-it depends on suppliments and proper nutrition. This article is one of the dumbest things I have heard of in a while-true life is stranger than fiction. Being a vegan puts you at risk for pernicious anemia if you are not careful :em41:

  34. Gribbit Comment by Gribbit

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    Vegans kill me. I mean, have you ever taken a good look at Dennis Kucinich? He’s a vegan and he looks more dead than the Crypt Keeper.

    Oh, in the event you didn’t get this bit of information, according to Ohio.com (That’s the official website for the Akron Beacon Journal)Dennis had to be hospitalized at the Cleveland Clinic because he got a case - of all things - food poisoning. Nothing like making the sickly sicker huh.

  35. Unregistered Comment by aries37

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    The only good Vegan will be the one who can breath in carbon dioxide and exhale oxygen.

    Till then they can quit wasting my air!

  36. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    mindy1
    god–you had me paranoid there for a bit. I’m not vegan–I eat fish and seafood, but gave up meat and was recently in the hospital with critical anemia. I read your comment and went “aack!” But it doesn’t seem like it’s a B12 issue–more of an ulcer type thing.

  37. Unregistered Comment by LC + IB Gutshot

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    YES! Misha hits organic chemistry!

    What I wouldn’t give to hear about some dude who lied to the chick and told her that he was clean, when he really like to eat everything from a hamburger to rotten deer carcasses. That would be awesome, especially when he broke her the news. “Baby, you’re infected!!!” :em41:

  38. Unregistered Comment by LC + IB Gutshot

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    And Psychochick, you need to go grab a nice strip steak and treat yourself to the luxuries of this world. God didn’t put fine-tasting cows on this earth to stare at fenceposts their whole lives.

  39. Cannon Fodder Comment by Cannon Fodder

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    Cruelty free consumers? I think someone should show those people how they harvest the VEGGIES that they eat. That is very cruel to the plants! And someone said they struggle with bodily fluids? I guess that person doesn’t drink milk either. I is a bodily fluid after all.

  40. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    Gutshot
    Don’t tempt me–I do love meat. It was hard to give it up. And I would be way more likely to eat a cow hanging out by a fencepost than one from a factory. But with my heart risk, it’s best to forego the tasty cow, made into juicy meatballs. Yum. I will admit the gruesome truth: I broke down and ate 3 meatballs last week. I hadn’t thought of this, but maybe I should treat myself on special occasions.

    About a year ago, I was driving home on the highway, and traffic was backed up. There was a police car, so I assumed accident. I finally got to the front, and there was a goddamn cow on the other side of the freeway. I stopped, and it trotted across and over onto the shoulder, so I took off. It was really odd (there are ranches around here).

    And our dog from the pound has the perfect markings to be an Australian kelpie. They herd sheep, cattle, and poultry and are used in this area for cattle herding. And the cow skull on the living room wall. I didn’t realize how many cow connections we had. (don’t mind me–I’ve been up all night) :em95:

  41. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    Cannon Fodder
    I understand that you are being satirical, but thought it was worth mentioning something that will not come as a surprise: those studies that showed that plants had feelings were very poorly done.

    Milk production isn’t at all cruel, is it? But if they are vegans, they wouldn’t touch it. You couldn’t pay me to be vegan, but my friend says she doesn’t feel at all deprived.

  42. Unregistered Comment by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant

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    Vegans have substantially lower cancer rates that people who eat meat

    They also have substantially less fun & joy in their lives as well, PC.

    Primarily because they’re constantly wringing their hands in angst and wagging their fingers at those of us who enjoy a damn fine steak.  (With a loaded baked potato, I might add.    )

    Just sayin’.

  43. Sir Christopher Comment by Sir Christopher

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    Don’t those folks have an ACLU down there?!?! How long can a city named “ChristChurch” remain in today’s intolerant world? I’m still waiting for them to get to “Sacramento” as that has an odious air of religion about it.

    As far as the couple, it the yeast they can do…

  44. Sir Christopher Comment by Sir Christopher

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    anybody see the “Opinion Poll” down there on the lower right side. It appears to be a father spanking somebody, and the poll is frantically asking readers if the nanny government should get involved. I hope they’re talking about more than spanking..

    Are you disgusted by the latest child abuse cases and do you think something should be done about it urgently?
    See story
    Yes. The Government needs to show some leadership.
    No. It is just the same old problem

    if they were talking about paedophiles, i could understand, but i get the feeling they’re more talking about parents,their children and rearing them.

    WOah, check out THIS lady….the “Lady” not the ancient Machine Gun… (I BET SHE’S A VEGAN and does not have sex with non-vegans, or anyone for that matter)

    All women will be questioned about family violence whenever they go to a public hospital, the Government said today.

    just as i suspected, they’re not talking about child predators….they’re probably protected down there, it’s the PARENTS we need to worry about…

  45. L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter Comment by L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter

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    Beer is a vegetable, ain’t it? All I need now is a tattoo of a pickle, and I’m in like Flynn!

  46. jaybear Comment by jaybear

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    Spats sez:

    They also have substantially less fun & joy in their lives as well, PC.

    roger that Spats, I know a couple of vegans up here in Wa. state….they are constantly in a hand wringing state of anxiety about something, that and they are the frailest and most pallid looking people I’ve ever seen.

    I had to restrict my beef consumption a few years back due to a colonic condition. I still have the occasional burger and steak etc, but limit it to about once a week, I eat lots of fish…salmon being a favorite if I can catch it….but I’ll tell ya’ I look forward to that big juicy steak or deluxe grilled burger, especially when they are smothered in sauteed Walla Walla sweet onions :em93: :em95: :em69:

  47. mile66 Comment by mile66

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    Don’t tell them, but I think they’re eating dead plants.
    “But plants don’t suffer when they’re killed!” Really? How do you know?
    Well, at least it makes it easier to determine where are this guys in modern society (Sheep, Wolves and Shepherd Dogs)

  48. BITOA Comment by BITOA

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    TELL MS VEGAN-
    I’LL STOP EATING MEAT
    WHEN YOU STOP LICKIN PUSSY !

  49. Unregistered Comment by jewells52

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    This out to make anyones blood boil: link

  50. Unregistered Comment by jewells52

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  51. Unregistered Comment by jewells52

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  52. Unregistered Comment by jewells52

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    I’m sorry, I am trying to post a link, obviously not working.

    [Fixed it. Select text, click button, paste link, click OK. You forgot the first step :-) — Emp.M.]

  53. SoCalOilMan, LC Comment by SoCalOilMan, LC

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    Beer is a vegetable, ain’t it?

    I saw a show on the History Channel where they refered to beer as liquid bread, and said it was major factor in people getting enough carbohydrates to survive during the Medieval Period. :em94:

  54. Unregistered Comment by mousseman

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    The main problem I see is about sexual practices, especially when the woman starts to swallow, she’s also eating proteins from an animal source. :em99:

    Holy crap! Too bad they’re not bound so much by principles else they’d die out withhin one generation.

  55. L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter Comment by L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter

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    Enough of this PC crap!

    The main problem I see is about sexual practices, especially when the woman starts to swallow, she’s also eating proteins from an animal source.

    Stop calling them vegans! They’re spitters!

  56. kwongdzu Comment by kwongdzu

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    Mousseman: A Swiss flag? Whereabouts are you? Say “hi” to the people in Cham for me!

  57. Vergeltung Comment by Vergeltung

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    Damn, guess I will now have to turn away the FedEx man when he delivers my order from the Tallgrass Beef Company on Friday ( http://www.tallgrassbeef.com ). :em99:

    I think these people are really strange. bordering on a psychological disorder. wierdos.

  58. Spartan24 Comment by Spartan24

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    Vegans border on psychotic to me too. I have had horrible reflux since I got pregnant so just about every vegitable makes it worse. I have almost lived off of milk, yogurt, frozen yogurt and cheese, but will take tums and eat other things and pay the consequences. As far as cancer goes, Linda McCartney was vegan and died of cancer at 53 if I remember right. I knew one vegan who had such poor bones that she often broke bones walking across the floor. I am deathly allergic to most shellfish and fish in general make me sick so that does not help me.

  59. LC Gunsniper Comment by LC Gunsniper

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    Not only do I support militant vegans shunning non-vegans, I support them moving to another planet preferably ruled by sentient plant life.

  60. LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech Comment by LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech

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    If we’re not supposed to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?

    “But plants don’t suffer when they’re killed!” Really? How do you know?

    If they don’t suffer, how come bananas get bruised?

  61. L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter Comment by L.C. Mope, Imperial Offsetter

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    If we’re not supposed to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?

    :em99:

  62. Unregistered Comment by LC EFA

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    I’m a very active member of PETA

    People Eating Tasty Animals.

  63. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    I knew one vegan who had such poor bones that she often broke bones walking across the floor.

    I have a nephew that as a baby refused any and all dairy products. Can you imagine a child that didn’t even like cheese?? They had to pull his BABY TEETH and give him false teeth until his regular teeth grew in because his baby teeth grew out so fragile and were actually black from lack of calcium and Vitamin D.
    Fortunately he got over that and began eating dairy. He just graduated High School in May with a scholarship to study Mechanical Drafting and has already been approached by NASA to join their apprenticeship program.

  64. ohio right wing nut Comment by ohio right wing nut

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    Definition of “countryside”

    The place where un-cooked animals live.

  65. B.C., Imperial Torturer™ Comment by B.C., Imperial Torturer™

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    Vegansexuals: The Early Years

    The really sick thing is, Dr. Zira actually looks more attractive than the haggis-faced veggiedyke in the article. You know these chicks just use the “vegansexual” silliness to excuse them always having HUGE zucchinis & cukes in their fridges as stand-ins for their asparagus-dicked partners.

  66. Unregistered Pingback by Inoperable Terran » Uhh, yeah

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    […] and gentlemen, vegansexuals. Posted by Ian S. […]

  67. LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech Comment by LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech

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    LC Mrs. M-ITT™
    Pooor Babe.

    Y’know, teeth can tell a lot about a critter’s health, and what it should be eatin’.
    Most of us are issued a half-dozen or so that just ain’t for nuts and berrys.

  68. SoCalOilMan, LC Comment by SoCalOilMan, LC

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    Most of us are issued a half-dozen or so that just ain’t for nuts and berrys.

    And all this time I thought they were just for getting the damn shrink wrap off a new CD.

  69. LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech Comment by LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech

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    ..cork wrappers on spirits bottles,, that’s my guess..

  70. B.C., Imperial Torturer™ Comment by B.C., Imperial Torturer™

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    Damn, Cheapshot, at first glance I thought you’d typed
    “…cock wrappers…”. :em99:

  71. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

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    It’s all a cheap trick.
    Give up Beer.
    Give up Meat.
    Give up Cigarettes.
    Give up Loud Music.
    Give up Liquid Corn.
    Give up Honkey Tonkin’.
    Give up Wild Wimmin’.
    Give up Hunting.
    Give up Fishing.
    Give up Fighting.
    Give up Fast Cars.
    Give up ALL THE THINGS THAT MAKE LIFE FUN.

    You don’t live any longer. It just feels like it.

    Fuckin’ libruls

  72. LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech Comment by LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech

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    BC
    Well, ‘reckon them sharp un’s would work there too, just be dang carefull ’round them nuts n berries!

  73. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    Damn, Cheapshot, at first glance I thought you’d typed
    “…cock wrappers…”. :em99:

    You would, BeeCee, you would ;)

  74. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    Wil
    We aren’t all trying to take your freedoms away. The only thing I would question on your list is fighting (and I wish my spouse would quit smoking so Ii would have him around longer to torment)

    ———————-
    If the people aren’t militant and annoying, who gives a fuck what people eat? Enjoy your juicy steak. I’ll enjoy my salmon. The vegans can enjoy their restrictive diet–I don’t care (except for baby/child issues).

    Their loss to the body as graveyard people. You would think you would want to expand your pool of potential sex partners, not limit them.

    With the vegan cancer thing, I didn’t mean that anyone should become vegan, just that it was interesting. I could never be vegan.

    I can’t stand PETA, and there is this Christian satirist who might be offensive to some. He rants like a fundamentalist. It’s over the top, and some people think he’s really preaching, but he’s being satirical. He does a short piece on vegans and PETA and how God wants us to eat animals. (He’s a different SIGA than ours. I wrote and asked). POSSIBLE OFFENSE WARNING for Christians:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8e1yPjN03Wo

    I seem to be incapable of figuring out the link thing, and Misha just explained it.

  75. B.C., Imperial Torturer™ Comment by B.C., Imperial Torturer™

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    Meat Is Murder!

  76. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    :em99: :em99: :em99: :em99: :em99:

    And you’re killing ME, Brother!

  77. Spartan24 Comment by Spartan24

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    Islamic rage boy, that is a good one. Enjoy your salmon pc, I am trying to learn to eat fish but right now it is hard to try new stuff.

  78. Deathknyte Comment by Deathknyte

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    That “woman” looks more like a monkey. Or an ape-woman. She must have shaved off her extra hair for the picture.

  79. Robohobo Comment by Robohobo

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    psychochick-

    the death rate on this planet is 100% for any flavor of -ism, guaranteed. does not matter.

    the goal in life is to slide into the pearly gates, broke, body and mind worn out, saying: “Whew! What a ride!”

    all the rest is idiotic distraction

    my rules to live by:

    be nice, you never know who is armed or not
    eat what tastes good
    love fully. don’t be scared, anything else is just chicken.
    if i have to run to get there, it ain’t worth goin’
    if i can’t have fun, it ain’t worth doin’
    smile a lot, it keeps the worried ones worried and wondering what i am up to now.
    if your political philosophy can be summed up on a bumper sticker it is probably pretty shallow.
    same for your thoughts on a greater being.

    i am sure there is more, but is late. you get the idea.

    the hobo

  80. Robohobo Comment by Robohobo

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    PETA = People Eating Tasty Animals

  81. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    robohobo
    liked your list–except I would shorten the “be nice” to that alone.
    saved your post. you are saved for posterity under Guido’s instructions on how to knife fight.

    I’m not the food police. I think people should eat what they want. (except it bothers me that people eat dogs and cats in some parts of the world, and the monkey brain thing is really gross) Some isms live longer. It depends on your priorities. If living life to the fullest means steak, well go for it.

    I am diabetic–75% die of heart attacks. A diabetic’s risk for getting a heart attack is reduced 50% if you don’t eat a lot of red meat. Also, I’m really overweight, and my doctor thinks I might lose weight by cutting out meat. On the negative side, it probably didn’t help with the critical anemia.

    I wish I could master the live life to the fullest thing. I have the perfect life, but I fret about everything. For instance, I’m fretting about posting this. But it’s midnight, and I’m going to go walk the dog in perfect safety. The dangerous part is when he realizes he is getting a walk and starts leaping on me.

  82. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    Why do dogs and cats get special treatment? If it’s food, I eat it. Pigs are as intelligent and can be as friendly as dogs- if domesticated as pets. Otherwise, they’re farm animals raised for eating- as are food dogs.

    Mmm…. Korean food.

    I don’t particularly like insect, though. Nasty chitinous aftertaste.

  83. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    Actually, of the meat animals in the US, it would disturb me the most to eat pigs. They are supposed to be bright and have individual personalities like dogs. Winston Churchill said something like dogs look up to you; cats look down on you; but a pig looks you in the eye and treats you like an equal.

    I didn’t go into that, because I tend to come off as a fruitcake, and I’ve been accused of being an animal rights activist (think they are needed in med research!)

    Dogs and cats are meant to be worshipped! and sleep on their master’s beds (depending on the number of animals) It’s generally a totally emotional issue with dogs and cats. California euthanizes 450,000 dogs and cats a year, so it’s not like they don’t get killed in the US. What freaked me is that 500,000 dogs and cats a year nationally are killed because their owner died. We have someone lined up to take our dog if we both die. And there are evil people that take the money their relative left for the care of the animal and then put the animal in a shelter. Our person refused money, but I should leave her some in the will anyway. He might need medical care when he gets older.

    I would love to buy a champion Doberman as our next dog, but with all those dogs needing homes at the pound, I think we will do an adoption again when the horrible time comes. In our old house, my husband used to have the container of ashes of our old Doberman on his desk with her picture on top of it.

    This is a true story! This guy had the ashes of his dog Charlie on a vase on the mantel. His house got robbed, and they found lines on a table. Someone had been snorting the ashes! (I assume they thought they were drugs)

  84. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    The story was an indeterminate snopes, actually…. probably happened once in Britain, if I recall correctly.

    Dogs and cats are meant to be worshipped! and sleep on their master’s beds

    I have 2 cats and 2 iguanas, all rescued. One was destined to become a fur coat- he’s got very soft, low-shed fur and an extremely loose skin- product of fur trade breeding.

    But if someone wants to eat them, so be it- same as horses, cows, snakes, deer, whatever. Equal footing- one person’s pet is another’s entree.

    Just look at the West’s attitudes toward dogs vs. the Hindu attitude toward cattle.

  85. Unregistered Comment by seagoon

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    link apparently snorting dog yes, people no….

  86. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    seagoon
    That’s great that you rescued so many animals. I’ve always been intrigued by iguanas, but I’ve heard that they get huge. Another animal to obsess about! My tarantula and the rats died. Spousal allergy to rats ruins that for me.

    Intellectually, you are of course correct about eating animals. Every culture has their preferred beasts.

    However, when it becomes an emotional issue, the intellectual perspective goes out the window. People that eat dogs are evil! That’s all there is to it. That is really intolerant of me, and I should have respect for differing cultures. And I can bring myself to think they are just eating a food source, rather than being evil, but it’s hard. I worship dogs. (Not like I pray to them or anything–you know what I mean) I would go into a burning house to rescue my dog. I don’t have any children–I love the dog dearly. Some days, the dog is my favorite male of the household (I’ve been told never, ever say that).

  87. WayneB Comment by WayneB

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    Spartan24 - Try smoked Salmon. Seriously, it tastes like ham. When I mentioned that at a Jewish friend’s house, my wife hit me for some reason… :em93:

    Fortunately, for me, there aren’t many militant anythings around where I live. There was one militant feminist I knew in college who got so pissed when I brought up an article about disparities in Math skills between boys and girls that she wouldn’t even let me get to the point of the article, which indicated that the games and sports more often played by boys may influence Math aptitude more than those mostly played by girls. Most of the vegetarians I have met have been of the live and let live variety. So was the ONE vegan I know. However, he was decidedly unhealthy looking - way too skinny, and his skin had an unhealthy sheen that made him look like he was always sweating.

  88. LittleRott84 Comment by LittleRott84

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    PC-

    Ever thought about using ground turkey instead of beef?
    My mom uses that to replace ground beef for tacos and other things. It’s very good.

  89. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    Thanks guys for the advice. Wayne–haven’t had smoked salmon in years. had forgotten about it–time to change that!

    LittleRott
    I think ground turkey is a great alternative, but spouse despises it. I don’t think it tastes that different.

  90. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

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    LittleRott84

    Ever thought about using ground turkey instead of beef?
    My mom uses that to replace ground beef for tacos and other things. It’s very good.

    I still remember the time that the g/f and I decided to cook some ground turkey as patties.

    Even *I*, (whom has been known to eat just about anything under the sun, once), couldn’t stand it.

    Might be better as taco meat, but I don’t know that I will ever be able to knowingly eat it again…

  91. SoCalOilMan, LC Comment by SoCalOilMan, LC

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    Ever thought about using ground turkey instead of beef?

    My doctor got on my ass about my cholesterol level, so my wife switched to ground turkey rather than ground beef. Why? I don’t know, I always figured she rather I drop off early so she could travel.

    At first, I ate the turkey to spite her, then actually got to like the taste. It’s like venison, if you’re not use to it it tastes real funny. In tacos and burritos, I use so much hot sauce, the meat could be turkey, cow or armadillo and it wouldn’t matter. :em95:

  92. Sir Christopher Comment by Sir Christopher

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    Oilman, you and i are pretty fucking lucky to live in California… do they still have Gelsons and Bristol Farms gourmet supermarkets down there… I love going to Whole Foods but the people who work there look like Err America employees.

    Hot Sauce Good. Try HOT LIME

    And i fondly remember Muther Fuddruckers from my college days.

  93. psychochick Comment by psychochick

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    Christopher
    They have a Gelsons in Santa Barbara, where I used to live. I’m a little stingy about food, although I buy a lot of frozen entrees. And spend a fortune on almonds (good for the blood sugar)–they kept telling me that raisins were evil. (Speaking of the food police.)

  94. SoCalOilMan, LC Comment by SoCalOilMan, LC

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    I tend to stick with the classics. I love Tapatio, just good on everything, and Cholula, V-8 with a kick.

    As far as Tabasoco, which is a Cajun concoction where the maker liked the name of the river he relocated on after getting his ass kicked out of Louisiana, if I wanted to drink vinegar, I gotta half gallon in the pantry.

  95. Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P. Comment by Sir Guido Cabrone, LC, M.o.P.

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    Psychochick

    And spend a fortune on almonds (good for the blood sugar)–

    Try cinnamon capsules. They were good for about ten points on my 12hour checks. (two 500mg caps in morning.)

    (just do NOT try to dry swallow them. I made that mistake. Once.)

  96. LC Gunsniper Comment by LC Gunsniper

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    and Cholula, V-8 with a kick.

    A-freakin’-men! Nothing else comes close.

  97. SoCalOilMan, LC Comment by SoCalOilMan, LC

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    PC

    They have a Gelsons in Santa Barbara, where I used to live.

    Gelson’s is gone here, it’s a BBQ place now. Course I should mention that our’s was the original Gelson’s Meat Market here in Montrose Ca (circa 1954).

  98. SoCalOilMan, LC Comment by SoCalOilMan, LC

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    And if BC ’s hanging around, Montrose is a fine upstanding :em93: religious community. So any spurious comments about having a meat market here since 1954 is just plain wrong. :em93:

  99. Spartan24 Comment by Spartan24

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    Fish in general makes me sick. We dont eat pork but it is mostly a health thing, the stuff is really gross though. I use ground turkey in a meatball recipe that we have in place of ground pork and it works pretty well. There is also ground meat and cracker crumbs in it so you dont taste the turkey. I am pretty picky about meat, I have to get the leanest stuff I can find, it is really expensive so we usually cook meat Chinese style with a bunch of veggies and rice.

  100. Wild-Eyed Charlie Comment by Wild-Eyed Charlie

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    It’s all a cheap trick.
    Give up Beer.
    Give up Meat.
    Give up Cigarettes.
    Give up Loud Music.
    Give up Liquid Corn.
    Give up Honkey Tonkin’.
    Give up Wild Wimmin’.
    Give up Hunting.
    Give up Fishing.
    Give up Fighting.
    Give up Fast Cars.
    Give up ALL THE THINGS THAT MAKE LIFE FUN.

    You don’t live any longer. It just feels like it.

    Fuckin’ libruls

    I really pissed off the one cardiologist I’ve seen in this life. The GP found something called a “T-wave abnormality” or some such; nothing serious, he was just playing it safe.

    Anyway, the cardiologist was one of those “I can eat three pizzas a day for a week and STILL lose 1/2 a pound” pricks. Looked like a chicken that wasn’t even fit to make soup out of. He tells me that the T-wave thing is “nothing for a typically obese American male to worry about.” I reminded him: Eat healthy, exercise…DIE ANYWAY. He sure didn’t like that, but fuck him; I have re-instituted a policy of not giving money to “professional” people who insult me.

    Those who are afraid of death, are afraid of life as well.

  101. MasterGuns, Imperial Marine Comment by MasterGuns, Imperial Marine

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    Animals are made of meat.

    I like meat.

    I eat animals.

    Semper Fi

  102. MasterGuns, Imperial Marine Comment by MasterGuns, Imperial Marine

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    I also smoke, drink, spit, swear, chase women, drive fast, hunt, fish, make my own booze, play golf, and do damn near anything I want to. I’m 56(57 soon) going on 22 and loving life.

    Semper Fi from a happy man.