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Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler » Scott Boochamp: “Hey, I Was Only Kidding, You Guys!” (UPDATED Twice)
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Via Sir Christopher, the latest in the Boochamp & The New People’s Republic saga:

THE WEEKLY STANDARD has learned from a military source close to the investigation that Pvt. Scott Thomas Beauchamp–author of the much-disputed “Shock Troops” article in the New Republic’s July 23 issue as well as two previous “Baghdad Diarist” columns–signed a sworn statement admitting that all three articles he published in the New Republic were exaggerations and falsehoods–fabrications containing only “a smidgen of truth,” in the words of our source.

That’s a bit far from his previous July 26 statement: “I’m willing to stand by the entirety of my articles for the New Republic using my real name.”

Stand by them unless it’s under oath, it would appear.

The New People’s Socialist Republic, predictably, has no comment.

So which is it, Franklin FUBAR? Either your golden boy whom you stood by unquestioningly because he happened to be the one boning one of your staffers was lying to you, or he’s been lying under oath.

If the former, then you’re exposed (again) as a dumb, gullible oaf with not the merest hint of an understanding of the basics of reporting who shouldn’t be working at a media outlet, much less managing it. If you go with the latter and insist that your story is true no matter what Boochamp says, then you’re looking at sending your staffer Elspeth’s bun stuffer upriver for quite a while for perjury. Oh what a tangled web we weave, Franklin. Isn’t it fun being a full-time propagandist for al-Qaeda?

That whole post-Stephen Glass era of renewed credibility at the New Bullshit Republic, Franklin, how’s that working out for you, stunad?

UPDATE: And it gets better (thanks for LC Crunchie for pointing this one out to us):

According to the military source, Beauchamp’s recantation was volunteered on the first day of the military’s investigation. So as Beauchamp was in Iraq signing an affidavit denying the truth of his stories, the New Republic was publishing a statement from him on its website on July 26, in which Beauchamp said, “I’m willing to stand by the entirety of my articles for the New Republic using my real name.” [Emphasis added — Emp. M.]

Is your arse hurting yet, Franklin? Do you want some of Boudreaux’s Butt Paste™ with that?

Ya schmekel.

UPDATE the 2nd: Allahpundit plays the devil’s advocate, suggesting that Boochamp might have told the Army whatever they wanted to hear because it was his best hope of getting leniency.

Well, that theory might hold water if you were a blithering nutroot thinking that the Army can do whatever they want, the truth be damned, and I’m pretty much 100% certain that Allahpundit doesn’t fall into that category, hence the “devil’s advocate” comment.

The thing is: If Boochamp had been telling the truth, there’s not a damn thing the Army could’ve done to hurt him. The truth is an absolute defense, and any attempt by the Army to bludgeon somebody telling the truth just to “get back at him” would lead to a PR nightmare for the Army, with national headlines 24/7 AND Lil’ Boochamp becoming a national hero and martyr to everybody who ever questioned the Army’s authoritah. Which, coincidentally, is exactly the impression that Boochamp’s writings leave you with regarding his real motives for his bullshit extravaganza.

To put it less delicately: That martyr’s crown, those endless speaking engagements and books about “the price of speaking truth to power™” were EXACTLY what Boochamp had been hoping for. And now you’re telling me that he gave all of that up because they were about to give it to him?

Right. Pull the other one.

52 Responses to “Scott Boochamp: “Hey, I Was Only Kidding, You Guys!” (UPDATED Twice)”
  1. LC Mrs. M-ITT™ Comment by LC Mrs. M-ITT™

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    BWAAHAHAHAHA! Looks like someone’s Dogma got run over by their Karma. :em99: :em99:

  2. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    My understanding is that he was telling The New Repuke that he would stand by his story on the same day he was signing an affidavit recanting his “stories”. :em99:

    Faggot (I still have offsets, Mopes volume sales are a real deal).

  3. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

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    Oh Mrs. M, that was so bad it’s good. :em34:

    But didn’t you mean someones Dogma got run over by his Bradley?

  4. DдrтH бдкфи Comment by DдrтH бдкфи

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    Emp, I fixed this for ya!

    who shouldn’t be working at a media Cinnnabon outlet, much less managing it.

  5. Unregistered Comment by Marvin2

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    I wish I could have a chat with this Pvt.

    A one-sided talk that begins “You are accused of violating Article ## of the Uniformed Code of Military Justice. You have right to ……”

  6. LC Gunsniper Comment by LC Gunsniper

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    There aren’t enough towels and soap bars to give this idiot shitbird a proper “blanket party”.

  7. Beth* A. Comment by Beth* A.

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    Burn! BUUUURRRRRRNNNNNNNNN! Wicked, smokin’ hot, BURRRNNNNNNNNN! :em71:

    Couldn’t have happened to a nicer :em95: fellow.

    And you know what really‘ll burn his arse, standing all alone all by his widdle self at the end of this short limb of his own making 294 feet off terra firma? A Flame (of his own farkin’ making) about 300 glorious feet high! There goes ol’ Scott T. Buh bye, we have some lovely parting gifts for ya. :em99: Whoops, sorry, no. That’d be the JAG! Buwahahahahahahah!

    I’ve gotta say this again, this time for NR - BUUUURRRNNNNNN! :em69:

  8. LittleRott84 Comment by LittleRott84

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    I wish I could have a chat with this Pvt.

    A one-sided talk that begins “You are accused of violating Article ## of the Uniformed Code of Military Justice. You have right to ……”

    I do too, but alas, I am not JAG.

  9. LC & IB Kat, GLOR Comment by LC & IB Kat, GLOR

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    You know, I was just telling the Darling Munchkin last night (after watching Mr. Smith goes to Washington, that the Truth will always come out. It may take a lot of pain and travail, and we MAY have to wait until that Day, but the Truth will always triumph.

    Having expressed that sober, yet confident conviction, I now find that I must echo Beth A’s sentiments:

    BUURRRRRRRN, BABY! BUURRRRRN!

    :em95: :em95: :em95: :em95:

  10. Beth* A. Comment by Beth* A.

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    But didn’t you mean someones Dogma got run over by his Bradley?

    Crunchie, that is…words don’t…ah hell, ‘priceless’ is as close as it gets.

    Mope, more offsets over this way, please!

  11. Beth* A. Comment by Beth* A.

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    To put it less delicately: That martyr’s crown, those endless speaking engagements and books about “the price of speaking truth to power™” were EXACTLY what Boochamp had been hoping for. And now you’re telling me that he gave all of that up because they were about to give it to him?

    Right. Pull the other one.

    *Andy Rooney’s voice, just for the hey of it:* (can’t use any harsher language till Mope comes thru for me on those offsets :em99: )

    “You know how sometimes you know something feels wrong in an argument, but you (or at least, I) can’t quite put your finger on where the logic breaks down?”/Rooney off

    This answered it for me, Sire. Big thanks for the ’splainin’.

    Back to celebrating! :em94:

  12. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

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    “You know how sometimes you know something feels wrong in an argument, but you (or at least, I) can’t quite put your finger on where the logic breaks down?”/Rooney off

    This answered it for me, Sire. Big thanks for the ’splainin’.

    You’re entirely too kind, Milady Beth. It’s what I do: Sit around and mull endlessly (much to the irritation of my poor, suffering family) over something that doesn’t make sense to me either, trying to distill the essence out of it and come up with something that does make sense.

    Sometimes I even land in the same ZIP code as the truth ;)

  13. Unregistered Comment by leoni2

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    Beth,

    My my, and how much time have you been spending with Kelso to say Burn in such a fine tone?

    As for Pvt. Beauchump, Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Liar, liar, pants on fire!!! Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! :em95: And the beauty of all this is is that if he leaves the service and claimed that he lied to the army during an investigation, he’ll be having a visit from JAG for signing that paper under false pretenses.

    I’m just waiting for him to actually do it. I fact I’m helping he does. I need to see his stupid ass twisting in the wind. :em99:

    So I can be cold hearted when I want to be. Bite me! :em95:

  14. LC Scott Comment by LC Scott

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    Humm- If this commenter at Ace’s place is right then beachcramp didn’t even come up with his own story line.

  15. Unregistered Comment by thefrollickingmole

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    Beu-Chumps future looks more like “you want fries with that” than “I proudly accept my Pulitzer prize for….”

    How many GI’s did you get killed with your stories of brutal Yanks you shitbird. Was your story the one that encourages the next splodydope attack? Or was it just “harmless invention”?
    Why hasnt he been charged?
    And pray tell what was the “smidgen of truth”, is that some fancy name for the cheese under the foreskin of the nearest jihadi wannabe?
    Sickening scum. :em96:

  16. Unregistered Comment by leoni2, LC

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    Scott,

    Humm- If this commenter at Ace’s place is right then beachcramp didn’t even come up with his own story line.

    Oh god, if that is true, not only is Beauchump a liar, but he’s a plagarist to boot. It just keep getting better and better. Except for Beauchamp. He’s looking dumber and dumber. Oh, TNR, start praying!!!! :em99:

  17. Unregistered Comment by mindy1

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    To this day I STILL don’t get why he did that. What pleasure could he have gotten by making his fellow soldiers look like barbarians. Like I said, he should have to live in Walter Reed for 2 months, give the nurses aids a vacation, and have to do everything, and I mean EVERYTHING they do, including “cleaning up” after patients :em99:

  18. DJM Comment by DJM

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    The New Republic Has issued a statement:

    Although we place great weight on the corroborations we have received, we wished to know more. But, late last week, the Army began its own investigation, short-circuiting our efforts. Beauchamp had his cell-phone and computer taken away and is currently unable to speak to even his family. His fellow soldiers no longer feel comfortable communicating with reporters. If further substantive information comes to light, TNR will, of course, share it with you.

    Yeah, right. I won’t hold my breath waiting for the New Republic to admit they screwed up big time. They are still standing behind Beauchamp.

    For added amusement, check out some of the comments. All are in favor of that liar.

  19. Unregistered Comment by daveinboca

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    Let’s remember that the new Managing Editor of TNR, Franklin Foer, is the degenerate spawn of one of the farthest left “historians” on the fake-history bash-the-USA academicide front. Papa Foer has won many historical prizes for consistently unmaksing the evils in America, especially during the Reconstruction, and still presides at Columbia U., where “left” means “centrist” and “centrists” don’t exist. Foer hates America as much as his Daddy did. Peretz should fire Franklin Foer’s ass, before more hate-America spew stains TNR.

    Evil Poppa begets evil son who enables evil chronicler. Just connect the dots. No fault on the left, as Mark Rudd told me decades ago when I was a deluded SDS volunteer. He smoked my dope & left me with the advice, “Dare to cheat, dare to win.” Could be Columbia U’s motto! At least when CSJ hands out Pulitzers!

  20. Unregistered Comment by ErikZ

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    It’s great that this has finally gotten cleared up, but why does it feel like a hollow victory?

    Has New Republic made an official statement yet?

  21. DaToad Comment by DaToad

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    One discredited POS down. But I doubt that it will have much impact on Freelyin Foer and New repulsive.

  22. Vergeltung Comment by Vergeltung

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    always the same from the left; intentions more important than results, form over substance, etc. they sucked the lie up with a straw, because it is what they want to hear; what they want to believe…

    TNR is getting in line behind the NYT, watching their reputations for veracity spin down the toilet.

  23. DJM Comment by DJM

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    #20 ErikZ - Yes. Please refer to my comment, two above yours.

    :em94:

  24. Vergeltung Comment by Vergeltung

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    Mark Steyn summed up the impact to TNR, and its internal causes nicely:

    […..] if that Weekly Standard story is correct, it moves Private Beauchamp into full-blown Stephen Glass territory. In essence, they made the same mistakes all over again - falling for pat cinematic vividness, pseudo-novelistic dialogue, all designed to confirm prejudices so ingrained the editors didn’t even recognize they were being pandered to. But this time they did it in war, which is worse.

    it’s an insidious attack on the moral character of the troops.

  25. Unregistered Comment by GUYK

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    The boy was just following the left wing tactics..lie if it fits the agenda and blame the right wing if the lie gets exposed.

  26. Unregistered Pingback by Neocon News » Scott Thomas Beauchamp back to school?

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    […] Middling Ground: more on the semiotics of Scott Thomas Beauchamp | The Leftist Confederacy | … tells Army he made it all up | Beauchamp admits to bullsh*t | Beauchamp: No! I was lying to TNR, not to the U.S. Army, really! | Why is there a market for lies? | Beauchamp comes clean | Beauchamp recants entire work to Army Investigators | The latest on Scott Beauchamp, part 2 | Beauchamp Recants [Updated] | Beauchamp admits his stories were “Exaggerations” and “Falsehoods” | Breaking: Beauchamp signs military statement recanting TNR pieces; Update: “armylawyer” comments | Let Beauchamp get back to the war | The DVD is already out. | “Hey, I was only kidding!” […]

  27. Unregistered Comment by LC Wes, Imperial Mohel

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    To put it less delicately: That martyr’s crown, those endless speaking engagements and books about “the price of speaking truth to power™” were EXACTLY what Boochamp had been hoping for.

    Beauchamp isn’t the only one. Why else does the media go out of its way to promote such losers and poseurs as Beauchamp and Jesse Macbeth? If Beauchamp and his ilk are going to be “martyrs,” then the media wants credit for breaking the story and saying “See, we were right about the war, the military and the Bushies all along!”

    That is, when the political hacks that comprise American journalism aren’t trying to claim that martyr’s crown for themselves, as Dan Rather has done ever since the Memogate scandal blew up in his face…

  28. Unregistered Comment by leoni2, LC

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    DJM,

    Yeah, right. I won’t hold my breath waiting for the New Republic to admit they screwed up big time. They are still standing behind Beauchamp.

    For added amusement, check out some of the comments. All are in favor of that liar.

    Oh, you think that’s something. Those morons at TNR appear to be starting a smear campaign on General Petreaus. Ladies and Gentlemen, unless I’m wrong, I’m guessing the surge is actually doing the job and these bozos are trying to shoot the messenger of good news before he can give his report to the Congress next month. It’s suppose to be in the 8-6-07 issue, under the title, Army of One by Andrew Bacevich. Anyone want to take a look to see what that guy wrote?

  29. Vergeltung Comment by Vergeltung

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    TNR now has a statement out saying they contacted Commander Lamb (I think that was his name), and they were told he was not aware of any retraction by Scottie.

    Something is very odd.

  30. Vergeltung Comment by Vergeltung

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    here’s TNRs response (sorry for the double post. wish there was an edit function :) )

    We’ve talked to military personnel directly involved in the events that Scott Thomas Beauchamp described, and they corroborated his account as detailed in our statement. When we called Army spokesman Major Steven F. Lamb and asked about an anonymously sourced allegation that Beauchamp had recanted his articles in a sworn statement, he told us, “I have no knowledge of that.” He added, “If someone is speaking anonymously [to The Weekly Standard], they are on their own.” When we pressed Lamb for details on the Army investigation, he told us, “We don’t go into the details of how we conduct our investigations.”

    :em38:

  31. Unregistered Comment by TJ's Anti-contrarian blog

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    I see a bigger conspiracy. Perhaps BeauCHUMP and Joey Soltz (of y2Kos-tard fame) are positioning themselves for future political office.

  32. Unregistered Comment by leoni2, LC

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    Vergeltung,

    Man, did you really think that TNR was going to surrender to reality that easily? Those morons are going to just keep denying the truth until someone from the army goes on the record that Beauchamp has recanted, and maybe not even then.

  33. Vergeltung Comment by Vergeltung

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    leoni2, LC
    Vergeltung,

    Man, did you really think that TNR was going to surrender to reality that easily? Those morons are going to just keep denying the truth until someone from the army goes on the record that Beauchamp has recanted, and maybe not even then.

    yeah, that does appear to be their direction at this time; to just keep digging the hole deeper! :em72:

  34. maxxdog Comment by maxxdog

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    One of our state legislators has stated that global wormening contributed to the bridge collapse. I’ll find a link and post it.

  35. Unregistered Comment by leoni2, LC

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    maxxdog,

    One of our state legislators has stated that global wormening contributed to the bridge collapse. I’ll find a link and post it.

    What the? Let me translate.. I’m trying to find some way so that my constitutents won’t come after me with the flames and pitchfork for my little involvement in the national infrastration being as poor as it is right now. Shall I start laughing now? :em99:

  36. Unregistered Comment by leoni2, LC

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I meant infrastruction.

  37. Unregistered Comment by leoni2, LC

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Infrastructure. Drat it all.

  38. maxxdog Comment by maxxdog

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1877464/posts
    Here’s a Clintonista saying it

  39. Radical Redneck Comment by Radical Redneck

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    Ex KBG Operative: “Left using KGB style disinformation to weaken America” :em72: :em96:

  40. maxxdog Comment by maxxdog

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    I’m sorry. I had the wrong post. D’oh!
    :em98:

  41. LC HJ Caveman82952 Comment by LC HJ Caveman82952

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    They could execute this dirtbag for all I feel. Actually it may make me feel better. But to meet his fate beaten to death by soldiers strikes me as quite fitting. Funny how these leftist roaches scurry for their holes once the light hits them……

  42. Emperor Misha I Comment by Emperor Misha I

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    They could execute this dirtbag for all I feel. Actually it may make me feel better. But to meet his fate beaten to death by soldiers strikes me as quite fitting.

    You know what? The more I think about it, the more I realize that Blackfive is right about the punishment in this case: Busting his ass so low that he has to salute a trash can and then force him to serve out his time among people who hate and despise his gut and wouldn’t piss on his hair if it were on fire is so much more satisfying than the transient satisfaction of learning about his sudden and well-deserved demise.

    But then again, I am evil.

  43. Unregistered Comment by leoni2, LC

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    RR,

    Thanks for link to the WSJ article. A lot of food for thought there. Just surprised that someone with his background hasn’t said it sooner.

    Caveman and Misha,

    I agree. Letting him stay after being busted so low he would need a ladder to look up would be the best thing to do to his sorry ass. If anything, it’ll make him see how much damage he’d caused, and will at least keep him quiet for a while.

  44. LCBrendan Comment by LCBrendan

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Beauchamp had his cell-phone and computer taken away and is currently unable to speak to even his family.

    That is a LIE. The Army would NEVER do that…they’d have a panicked family on their hands.

  45. B.C., Imperial Torturer™ Comment by B.C., Imperial Torturer™

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Quoth’d The Imperator™:

    You know what? The more I think about it, the more I realize that Blackfive is right about the punishment in this case: Busting his ass so low that he has to salute a trash can and then force him to serve out his time among people who hate and despise his gut and wouldn’t piss on his hair if it were on fire is so much more satisfying than the transient satisfaction of learning about his sudden and well-deserved demise.

    Bust him to E- -1 (That’s “Enlisted- Negative 1“. HE pays the Army every two weeks.) Then make him walk, with fully-loaded pack, in front of convoys moving around Iraq whacking the ground, on both sides of the road, with a New & Improved! IED DetectoClub™ by Ronco®. (It’s really just a heavy stick about 4 feet long, but hey, we won’t tell HIM.)

  46. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Unroll his guts and drop fire ants on them.

    One at a time.

  47. LC Wil Comment by LC Wil

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Tatto a Cross of David on his chest. Put him in full uniform. Parachute his ass into Mecca. During Hadj.

  48. LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech Comment by LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Busting his ass so low that he has to salute a trash can and then force him to serve out his time among people who hate and despise his gut and wouldn’t piss on his hair if it were on fire is so much more satisfying than the transient satisfaction of learning about his sudden and well-deserved demise.

    Investing long in justice,, grind em’ slow.
    As a bonus,,’make’s a fine, ready-to-point-at object lesson.

    But then again, I am evil.


    “Read dozens of books
    About heroes and crooks
    And I learned a lot From both of their styles..”

    Umm, would somebody look out in the hall and see if there’s an open thread hangin’ around?
    ‘Takes some pressure offa’ the migrating Authors.

  49. LC Gunsniper Comment by LC Gunsniper

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Tatto a Cross of David on his chest. Put him in full uniform. Parachute his ass into Mecca. During Hadj.

    …with a pink dildo in each hand.

  50. HarleyRace Comment by HarleyRace

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    Beauchamp put himself in great danger to expose The Truth!

    That makes him a hero in my book!

  51. LC Gunsniper Comment by LC Gunsniper

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    Heh. I say “pink dildo” and Tardley comes a’runnin’.

    :em99:

  52. LC 0311 crunchie Comment by LC 0311 crunchie

    Strict Standards: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, non-static method emotions::filter_text() should not be called statically in /home/misha/public_html/2007/wp-includes/plugin.php on line 59

    Gunsniper found the Libtard mating call! :em99: